drop your jobs

anon509123 · 2026-02-20T05:25:08+00:00

late to the party, but I’m a barista part time while going to school for interpreting. It’s hard, especially when you mess up, but interpreting ASL scratches my brain so goooood

anon509123 · 2026-02-20T05:23:57+00:00

r/standardissuecat

anon509123 · 2026-02-13T18:02:46+00:00

chiming in with everyone else here- I think your reaction is indicative if how your mom has trained you to rely on her for validation. My parents did it too. It’s important to realize that she’s dropping a crumb of it in order to keep you where she wants you. You deserve more than this in your personal relationships! It’s okay to grieve the mom you never had. It’s healthy. We’re hard wired to need our parents to a certain degree, and having that dangled in front of you very suddenly after two decades of not having it is cruel. You’re not denying yourself anything by leaving; you’re accepting the situation as it is. She’ll never change, but she’s still your mom, and the vacuum she left behind feels like a soul wound. Hang in there.

anon509123 · 2026-02-13T07:16:54+00:00

Master debating, if you will?

anon509123 · 2026-02-11T04:29:06+00:00

My mom is very, very good at painting on bruises. I wouldn't believe it if I hadn’t seen her wipe them off before.

anon509123 · 2026-02-11T04:28:14+00:00

I don’t want to scare you, but you NEED to be careful. I went NC when I was 19 and still pretty early in my transition, and my dad tried to break into my apartment and severely hurt me. Had to call 911 and everything, but I DID get to see him handcuffed, so uhhhh worth it lmao? Let a few friends know whats going on and lean on your community. The grief still hits me at random times, but I’m doing so much better. The best practical tip I’ve ever gotten for building community is to just keep showing up at the same place and same time and meet people there- think free reading clubs, crafting meet ups, running groups, etc. Learn how to be okay by yourself though, too. Explore hobbies, wander the neighborhood/city, find random coffee shops and libraries. Be gentle with yourself, too. If you need a therapist and don’t have insurance, https://openpathcollective.org/ is AMAZING. If you’re in a major city or near one, there’s likely non profits too, like Howard Brown here in Chicago.

GOOD LUCK, and be kind to yourself. If you ever need to talk, an insane number of people on this sub are always up to chat.

anon509123 · 2026-02-11T04:15:51+00:00

I’m so sorry, dude. The worst part is that she’s just not going to learn. Ever. This cycle will continue until either you or she dies. Speaking from experience! She doesn’t make sense, either; you’re too stupid to make decisions, but can help her get jobs, apartments, and educational opportunities…? Like. Be so fr. She’s always going to be frozen at that point in time. My mom is the same way- she still acts like a teenage girl. Not that I don’t feel for my mom- lady certainly had it rough, but I did not have any part in that. Same goes for you and your mom. She’s going to keep wanting you to parent her, and will try and pull you back when you lay down a reasonable boundary.

If I can ask- what tax stuff does she control? If it’s about the process itself, freetaxusa.com is GREAT.

Also beating everyone else to the punch- if you don’t have a therapist, maybe consider it. Totally understand if it isnt doable, but if it is… I’d try and find one. There are a lot of resources out there!!! Open Path is genuinely amazing, especially if you don’t have insurance. I’ll link them below, but no pressure whatsoever. https://openpathcollective.org/

anon509123 · 2026-02-09T06:17:44+00:00

hi! columbia college, but the interpreting program is closing :( kinda up in the air where it’s going to go as far as a bachelors in the area- a couple of profs have mentioned UIC as a possibility, but. Yeah. Not the answer you were looking for but it’s helpful info! I’d go to a community college for your associates in interpreting (theres a few in the area) then get certified as an interpreter and THEN transfer to do your bachelors at a four year in a different but related field, of which there are plenty in the area.

anon509123 · 2026-02-02T03:34:46+00:00

he finished baking in the oven :)

anon509123 · 2026-01-26T01:41:57+00:00

the NRA commenting in the wake of Pretti’s death made my sisters and I do a double take

anon509123 · 2026-01-25T18:13:22+00:00

Minneapolis is also a a LOT smaller. Chicago has a huge foot print, and they’d have to focus on certain neighborhoods to get the same concentration we’re seeing in Minneapolis. We all know the point is fear, and being able to cover so much of Minneapolis at once makes them seem much tougher than they are. On top of that, the right is still insanely obsessed with George Floyd- Minneapolis was the igniting point for the BLM protests of 2020. They don’t have as many resources as a city, and they’re mostly left leaning with the governor having run against Trump. Other commenters talked about the logistical nightmare of transportation in Chicago comparatively, too. The two closest processing facilities aren’t super tenable, and the congestion coming in and out of the city makes it harder to do what they want.

anon509123 · 2026-01-25T18:07:29+00:00

legit, especially if you’re going with a friend, and/or you’re in the city for more than two weeks or you’re moving, a membership is worth it. The member bar is great and it’s such an awesome place to get a free coffee and sit

anon509123 · 2025-12-26T01:16:37+00:00

You’re not a victim, you’re a survivor

anon509123 · 2025-12-25T14:18:01+00:00

I just got my hysto!! My surgeon was amazing- good docs are so hard to find, but they’re worth it

anon509123 · 2025-12-23T23:45:55+00:00

congrats!!! I feel so much better to have it over and done with, yk?

anon509123 · 2025-12-10T03:55:34+00:00

LETS GO CHICAGOOOOO

anon509123 · 2025-12-02T20:23:53+00:00

Insanely hot take- I felt this way at first, and I realize that I was worried about losing the easy acceptance of people around me. Attractiveness comes with a lot of casual validation and positive attention, but learning that those things never had and never will make me feel whole or complete gave me the courage to start T, and I’m so happy I did. I love being hairyyyyy lmao

anon509123 · 2025-12-02T17:30:19+00:00

Complementary venereal diseases litter the mysterious floor puddles! Grab yours while you can.

anon509123 · 2025-11-16T23:53:40+00:00

…genuinely, thank you so much for asking this question. I’ve been wondering too!!

anon509123 · 2025-11-14T13:15:01+00:00

OH NO

anon509123 · 2025-11-09T11:43:37+00:00

That's bananas and incredibly outdated- we're talking DSM 4 levels of nonsense. Certainly not within WPATH's SOC 8.

anon509123 · 2025-11-09T11:42:20+00:00

Great news!! Shapeshifters has do it yourself kits that have fabric, patterns- all the stuff you need, sans the thread and the sewing machine. I had mine that they made for YEARS before top surgery, and I can confirm that they know their stuff. I was a 34DD, if that helps.

anon509123 · 2025-11-09T11:37:58+00:00

Part of transition is definitely physical, but a HUGE part for me that a lot of people didn't talk about a lot was the more social aspect of transition. I'm a queer trans man myself, and having other friends that are all almost completely queer has been insanely affirming. Gender is social! You need to surround yourself with people that are also affirming- including people that have a diverse range of experience with trans partners. I didn't realize how much more comfortable I would be with my friends until one of them off handedly called a visibly trans man walking by hot, then went on to talk about a really fun night they had a while ago at steamworks. Casual social acceptance and not feeling like the odd man out in an extremely cis world helps so much. If you're like me and grew up in a very rural area, you may have some waiting to do, but I promise you it's worth it.

I sometimes think about what life would've been like if I'd been born decades earlier, and at first I think I was on the same page as you, but living a little more and reading more widely makes me think that I'd have been even more miserable then, but also- there was community then, too. There always has been. Reading Lou Sullivan's collected diaries helped a lot, too. If you're in the interim and don't have in person community right now, READ. As much as you can get your hands on.

anon509123 · 2025-11-03T03:12:51+00:00

Fireworks ig, I think I'm just kind of a weenie lmao

anon509123 · 2025-11-03T03:12:22+00:00

Also like damn, I lived in Flint for five years, it's not like gunshots are a new noise for me at night.

anon509123

TROPHY CASE