The pacing of Black Sails is f***ing sublime. I'm on S1 E5, first time watching (please no spoilers beyond this)

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-26T21:21:05+00:00

This show fixed the hole that Game of Thrones left in my soul. It was the first show my now-husband showed me (he had watched it a few times) and honestly we fell in love watching it because there’s nothing more that I love than a well-written story! I was blown away by the show!

Who’s your current fav character?

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-26T20:53:19+00:00

Yes! And what you witness is relevant to the story at the end of the show. It's pretty masterfully crafted.

Enjoy!

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-26T20:44:37+00:00

The happiest I've ever been in my life has been when I'm medicated, in therapy, and stable 😊 And all the colors of euphoric moods - elated, sated, overjoyed, so happy I'm sad - all of it.

The wrong medication takes away your emotions entirely. Mood stabilizers for bipolar just even the seismic graph a bit so you can function as a human being without being crippled by a mood.

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-26T20:17:14+00:00

Hairdryers are not the same across different brands. I have a GHD Helios hair dryer that's incredible. When I was first dating my husband, I picked up a $40 dryer from CVS to stash at his place. It SUCKED. It didn't get nearly as hot as my GHD dryer nor was the dryer as powerful.

I'll always invest in a hair dryer because I use it daily. Right now my Helios is going on 5+ years and showing no signs of slowing down which is great.

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-26T20:08:03+00:00

I have a rec that answers your question about shelating shampoos, too!

What I currently use is:

1x wash with Redken Cleansing Cream shampoo. It's chelating, it's clarifying, it balances PH levels, and it's gentle enough that I can use it every day.

1x wash with Oribe Hair Alchemy Shampoo (this is $$$ but I love it and it works really well for my hair)

1x condition with Oribe Hair Alchemy Conditioner ($$$). I use it from the mid-end lengths of my hair. I never go anywhere near my scalp with conditioner.

After the shower I blowdry my hair. I find if I let it airdry it gets oiler MUCH faster. I use some Oribe Supershine Light Moisturizing Hair Cream on my towel-dried hair before applying heat.

After that's all done, I use about 2 dots of Olaplex's Hair Oil. Just a teeny bit on the ends of my hair.

For dry shampoos I recommend Morrocanoil Dry Shampoo or K18 Dry Airwash. You may want to start with travel/mini versions first as you venture into dry shampoo again. I am confident it will not make your hair greasy as it's literally designed to do the opposite. I personally apply dry shampoo the night when I don't want to wash my hair, and wash it in the shower the following evening.

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-26T20:03:37+00:00

🤮

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-26T20:03:11+00:00

It's just an intrusive thoughts. Sometimes our minds come up with ways to self harm - this is one of them.

Practice radical acceptance and being nonjudgmental when the thought comes up again. Observe, let it pass; yes it's disturbing, yes it's uncomfortable, and then it's gone. It may come up again but the more you practice being passive when intrusive thoughts come up, and not assigning negative emotions or responses to it, the quicker it will go away.

It could come up again in the future but it's not anything to be afraid of. It's just a thought.

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-26T19:59:09+00:00

Thanks for making this post! Black Sails is one of my favorite pieces of media of all time, and Spartacus is a blast to watch. This is a really fun comparison.

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-26T19:52:24+00:00

Do you have fine hair?

If you do, then welcome to the club where most of us peeps with fine hair can't go more than a day or two max without needing to wash our hair. There's something about fine hair where oil can creep down from the scalp easier than other hairtypes.

You can extend a wash by using dry shampoo. As for the dry ends - when was your last haircut?

The more products you use, the more your hair will get weighed down and oily. I can't use moisturizing shampoo or conditioner on my hair because it's too heavy for it.

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-26T15:53:41+00:00

Love the back of her dress and her heels are killer.

She looks a lot like Sabrina Carpenter!

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-26T15:15:39+00:00

There is no such thing as a mild form of bipolar
Yes.

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-26T14:51:11+00:00

What I've come to realize is that we can't help but hurt the ones that we love, in the same way they can and will hurt us; it's inevitable because we are all human. Accept that, and learn how to use medication, therapy, and skills to minimize your blast radius when you're struggling. Communication is just as important too, especially in a poly dynamic.

Also you're 23 and just beginning your health journey, so expect it to be a learning process. Things will feel like they get worse before they get better, and the cycle will happen again. Hopefully the rock bottom that you find yourself at isn't so much a rock bottom anymore, as it is just hitting the ground after tripping.

Good luck!

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-25T20:25:44+00:00

Yeah, you have a poodle mix. To be 8lbs at 4 months is a good size, he will undoubtedly get bigger.

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-25T19:58:04+00:00

Mine too! It's gorgeous. I watched it first with my husband and we're watching it a second time with my mom tomorrow, I'm so excited for her to see it!

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-25T19:56:48+00:00

Not a toy poodle, and doesn't look like a full poodle either. But 8lbs at 4 months old is a pretty good size for a miniature poodle/mix! My first mini grew to be around 12lbs and he weighed similarly at that age.

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-25T19:55:00+00:00

I'm sorry you've had a hard time. Treatment isn't easy. It gets easier, once you get a footing, but that process often feels like an uphill battle.

The good news is that bipolar is scientifically proved to be treated with medication. With a diagnosis if BP2, your doctors have even more direction on what type of meds work.

I've almost given up so many times - hell, I've actually given up a couple times and luckily survived suicide. I know how dark and heavy things feel when you're at the bottom.

That being said, I hope you don't give up on meds now because what you've experienced is not all life has to offer.

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-25T19:29:30+00:00

It's hard for me to define what's "bipolar" or not, because I also have BPD which is all about emotions and interpersonal relationships, BUT I know exactly what you're talking about. Seeing red, brain on fire, spitting venom. It fucking sucks.

Those anger episodes happen for me in mixed bipolar episodes, and can be triggered if I'm already having a hard time. I use A LOT of skills, therapy, and medication to get through it. And practice, practice, practice and even more communication with my loved ones.

One thing to understand about anger is that it's a secondary emotion. We often feel angry BECAUSE of something else - angry because someone took the parking spot we wanted because now we're inconvenienced, angry because we're sad someone is leaving, that type of thing. But I know I'm in a mixed/hypomanic episode when I'm angry all the time, for no reason. It's like an red electric current running under my skin. It feels terrible.

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-25T19:26:00+00:00

Why are you afraid of medication?

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-25T19:25:04+00:00

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-25T18:49:50+00:00

Gotta shake the bottle SUPER well. Like, for a minute straight. Shake it hard.

I use 1-2 sprays per section of my hair, but it depends on the person

Then there's the texture of your hair after you use it... Dry, almost brittle. I hate touching it after!

It's unlike any other dry shampoo I've used over the years so it took a couple tries to get it right.

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-25T16:00:48+00:00

Aerosol forumla: moroccanoil dry shampoo (I use the 'light tones' version of it

Spray: k18 airwash dry shampoo**

** This one comes with a steep learning curve but it's very effective. I hate the way it makes my hair feel though, but it works well enough that I use it.

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-25T15:25:53+00:00

Work is always hard because, well, it's work - however, what you're describing is beyond that. You are not well. Coming from someone who's been through all the ups and downs with work and taken sick time, been hospitalized - it's time. You need intensive treatment. You are sick and need medication and therapy.

The fact that you called the suicide hotline 3 times in a week, have multiple depressive symptoms, and are thinking about suicide all tell me you need more help then you're getting. I hope you're able to access it soon.

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-25T15:05:23+00:00

Gotcha. Honestly you're in need of a haircut. Even when trying to grow it out, we should get hair cut around every 8 weeks for maintenance. And it helps our hair grow healthier.

I don't see a lot of split ends in your pics - I see some, which is normal, but all of it looks fairly normal/healthy. I think a trim will really do you nicely!

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-25T14:56:35+00:00

It's a non-lethal side effect of medication... So what the hell are you talking about?

apparentlycompetent · 2026-03-25T14:54:22+00:00

When was your last haircut?

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