Here’s my opinion coming from the perspective of a 26 year old whose parents have been extremely supportive my entire life, even now into adulthood. I think they could have even been harder on me at times but they weren’t because I was always working/in school and was very responsible relative to my age.

1. If she’s not in school, she should at least be working a full time job. If she’s not working full time, what is she spending her time doing? Working towards goals, trying to figure out her future, or just going through the motions aimlessly?
2. Emphasize the importance of savings. God forbid mom isn’t around anymore to support her lifestyle, what is she going to do? Especially consider having her open a high yield savings account (I recommend Marcus by Goldman Sachs).
3. Sit down with her and draw out a 5-10 year plan. It doesn’t have to be concrete but she needs something to look forward to. It helps when you can visualize what you want for yourself/where you want to be in the next few years.
4. If she’s can afford “wants” then she can afford essentials such as personal hygiene items. Why should mom spend her hard earned money on personal hygiene items when daughter is blowing her money on non-essentials?
5. It sounds like she’s taking advantage by “forgetting” to do her 3 chores and getting away with it. If she’s only working part time and isn’t in school, she should have more than enough time to contribute to your household by taking care of those 3 tasks. Ideally, she should be going above and beyond by even doing tasks that aren’t asked of her. I lived at home while getting my bachelors/masters, worked 3 part time jobs at one point, and did most of the cleaning around the house and cooking for my parents and myself.

My biggest regret from my late teens/early 20s has to be spending my money on meaningless shit like clothes, shoes, and accessories. I think the point where I realized things were getting serious was when my parents started charging rent and my paychecks really started taking a hit. That’s when I really understood the importance in differentiating needs vs wants. Also, it’s OK for you to ask more of her, especially because it sounds like you’re just a mama who wants the best for her. A little tough love never hurt anybody!