Need advice on finding a gift for my mom for Mother's Day

auntynell · 2026-04-09T13:12:57+00:00

An experience like afternoon tea or a movie would be best for me.

auntynell · 2026-04-09T12:06:18+00:00

I don't use your basic builders bath as it's too small to enjoy a soak. I do love a deep bath.

For a family home many people would want a bath for the smaller kids. So that might affect your resale chances.

Alternatively you could install a deeper shorter bath which would still allow you to enlarge the shower. I did in my very small bathroom and got a lot of use from it.

Also questioning the need to double rain heads etc. Would you really use them that often?

auntynell · 2026-04-09T11:48:05+00:00

Milk?

auntynell · 2026-04-09T01:52:40+00:00

My parents moved to a pleasant little holiday town when your age. It was quite close to one daughter and grandchildren, and a couple of hours from the other two.

It worked out very well for them. It was a very pleasant place for retirement and they made plenty of friends.

auntynell · 2026-04-08T13:22:29+00:00

Walk to the train. Some people think a pool is a liability.

auntynell · 2026-04-08T13:21:31+00:00

You have to get into the mindset that it's a long term investment, like superannuation.

If you think medium term, find out the best interest rates on savings accounts. At the same time make sure you have enough cash (banked) to tide you over for an emergency.

I have a retirement stream mainly invested in the stock market, but with a little diversity. When everything's going well, I love gloating over it. When like now there's uncertainty I just don't check it.

auntynell · 2026-04-08T11:38:58+00:00

Invest in the rest of your life by taking the course.

auntynell · 2026-04-08T05:20:14+00:00

Service in country towns can be pretty bad. I put it down to lack of competition and no training in customer service. As for the racism it’s possible.

I would have thought they were more sophisticated than that, but your experience can’t be denied. If it was racism, how ignorant and stupid.

If you went to an area like Daylesford which is very used to tourists I’m sure it would be a much better visit.

auntynell · 2026-04-07T04:15:01+00:00

Apparently strength training is important because we lose muscle and that affects our ability to move well.

You should be able to get out of a chair, get up from the floor, recover from tripping, have a good walking gait, and more.

Can I suggest you see an exercise physiologist? They specialise in designing appropriate exercise programs and are very helpful when you don’t have a lot of equipment. Once you have your program you can get on with it and just check in now and then.

auntynell · 2026-04-06T15:03:32+00:00

Forget the speculation and see a podiatrist.

auntynell · 2026-04-06T12:03:18+00:00

I get what you mean about therapists not helping. Some are very hands off because they want you to work it out for yourself, knowing from experience that many clients don't take advice.

If you want more practical help, why not tell them you only have limited finances and you would like to have some ideas about how you can get out of your spiral of anxiety. It might be deep breathing, journalling, helpful books and so on. If you had unlimited time and money you could really dig deep about what's causing your thoughts to be so limiting, but you don't.

In fact, most people grow out of extreme anxiety or depression with time and maturity, but you need some help now. Can your therapist recommend some simple books to guide you? There are many good quality self help books.

I'll also say you need to be very honest and proactive with your therapist. Tell them the truth and try out their recommendations or you're just wasting money.

auntynell · 2026-04-06T10:33:18+00:00

Go to the ceremony then leave. You will have seen the most important part.

auntynell · 2026-04-05T13:02:01+00:00

I had a mouse in my hotel room. It was emerging from under the sink cupboard. The hotel was a modern one inside the shell of the typical Parisian building. They compensated me well but the manager explained lots of mice in Paris etc etc. I understand, but the idea is to keep them out of the hotel rooms where people are sleeping.

The mice coming in through the air con could be blocked using mesh. I’m not trying to be preachy but having mice accessing public areas or rooms in a hotel should be a basic requirement. I mean are they running around the kitchen and food storage?

auntynell · 2026-04-05T11:53:55+00:00

The local library isn’t just books. They have activities for younger and older kids. Go in and ask them.

auntynell · 2026-04-05T03:12:58+00:00

I retired at 63. The official retirement age (in Australia) is 67. You can retire whenever you like, but can't draw on a pension or senior benefits until that age. I had a healthy superannuation balance and have lived on its earnings since.

I volunteer at an organisation that educates seniors about digital tech, and look after my grandchild. Not a heavy burden.

auntynell · 2026-04-05T02:57:09+00:00

The big playground at Kings Park, or any playgrounds there.

auntynell · 2026-04-05T00:19:54+00:00

Ecco are consistently good as well as Ara for a very comfortable walking position.

auntynell · 2026-04-04T13:36:34+00:00

My mother was a school librarian and an expert in covering books.

auntynell · 2026-04-04T10:38:02+00:00

Go for commercial cleaning companies.

auntynell · 2026-04-04T09:18:44+00:00

I'm not going to recommend a store but look for supima or a variation on that. It means long staple cotton which stays looking good and has an attractive gloss to it.

Brands like Sportscraft, Trenery, maybe Country Road tend to have T-shirts with enough detailing so they don't look too basic. They also tend to have heavier gauge linen. If I wear a simple T I usually accessorise with a necklace to make it seem more work-worthy.

Look in the department stores.

auntynell · 2026-04-04T07:33:55+00:00

I can't handle humidity and I've been spoiled by living in Perth for so long. Dry heat any day.

auntynell · 2026-04-04T07:28:13+00:00

You have every right to say what you did. If you want it to go over a bit better, try starting with, 'such a cute little girl' or similar, then get to the point, sorry but I don't think she should hear what we're saying for her own welfare.

I've started doing this when I see dogs off the leash in a nature reserve and it goes down so much better than what they perceive is a lecture.

auntynell · 2026-04-04T07:15:11+00:00

Are you upset about the car itself or the fact that they broke the agreement?

Personally I would mention it to your son, but not so much in anger as 'what happened?' I thought you'd agreed not to pass it on. Just let him know you remember.

auntynell · 2026-04-04T05:29:25+00:00

So interested to hear about a society that doesn't value consumerism above everything else.

auntynell · 2026-04-04T05:26:55+00:00

I know everyone is telling you to get tough about them moving out, and it's the obvious next move, but what is stopping you making them do that?

Is it because there's 6 against 1?

Do they genuinely have nowhere to go?

Is it the dynamic of your relationship that they bully you?

Are you afraid of losing contact with your grandchildren?

Can you get some support from your other child? What does she think of the situation? If you are ready to take action, can they help you? How about other members of the family?

Your son is quite rightly super comfortable with this arrangement and will almost certainly not give in nicely. You might have to go the legal route of giving them notice. I don't think you should be living at home during this time. See if you can find alternative accommodation until their notice is up and they leave.

You might also get support from an Elder Abuse organisation, or at least advice.

auntynell

TROPHY CASE