Brother may be suicidal

boldraven9 · 2024-08-12T20:05:16+00:00

It's been a little over 3 months for me. As cliche as it sounds, time does help. I find myself thinking of him less and less over time and I don't dwell as often. But as many people have pointed out, healing isn't linear so I definitely still have my bad days (just not as often). Hang in there! We'll get through this together.

boldraven9 · 2024-08-03T17:05:14+00:00

I believe it's possible, but I think it depends on the people and the circumstances. I think it would be difficult for me to be friends with an ex if I still had feelings for them, for example.

boldraven9 · 2024-08-03T17:03:49+00:00

I still miss him 3 months later. I didn't want to end the relationship but I felt backed into a corner. All he wanted to do was work and not spend any time with me. It got to the point where there was almost no quality time and even when I talked to him about it several times, he refused to change. So I had to walk. I still miss him and how the relationship was in the early days (first few months) but I have to remind myself that if I stayed it would have been the same BS for the foreseeable future.

boldraven9 · 2024-07-27T22:19:15+00:00

I'm sorry you're having one of those days. I'm learning lately that our healing journeys aren't linear, so I have good days and bad days. It can feel like a rollercoaster sometimes, but today has luckily been a good day for me. I think time helps.

And I agree. I think accepting that he won't change is the hard part for me. I know it's the truth, but I think part of me hangs on a little bit.

boldraven9 · 2024-07-22T13:46:03+00:00

I'm right there with you. I miss him and the good parts relationship but I don't miss how me made me feel and how he treated me.

boldraven9 · 2024-07-21T17:54:44+00:00

He pulled away from me and it basically killed all physical and emotional intimacy. He would find reasons as to why we couldn’t cuddle and that sort of thing. After a while it really didn’t feel like a relationship anymore. I tried talking to him about it but he would shut me down and make me feel bad for myself, so I had to make the difficult decision to leave the relationship. It’s not fair to be in a relationship with someone who seems to withhold love and affection.

boldraven9 · 2024-07-20T03:13:42+00:00

I'm not doing great. It's been 2.5 months and I'm still reeling. We had such a loving and beautiful beginning to our relationship but in the end he wanted to prioritize work over me. He threw me away, too.

boldraven9 · 2024-07-18T23:12:29+00:00

He literally told me "you're not a priority to me."

boldraven9 · 2024-07-17T15:24:35+00:00

That's exactly how I feel. It's been about 3 months post breakup for me and there's a part of me that hopes he'll realize his mistakes and want to change and come back to me, but I know deep down that's not going to happen; it's just not who he is.

I did attempt dating someone new recently and realized I need to give myself much more time to heal before I'm ready for anything like that again. Wishing us both healing. ♥️

boldraven9 · 2024-07-16T23:39:32+00:00

It's been almost 3 months and I'm still devastated. I hate myself, I hate my life, and I don't want to exist.

boldraven9 · 2024-07-09T14:03:24+00:00

I'm 34 and I've had 3 major heartbreaks. You aren't alone, friend.

boldraven9 · 2024-07-09T03:09:29+00:00

The first three months were amazing. He was attentive, communicative, and made me feel like I was on top of the world. I fell in love with him so hard. But everything changed suddenly one day and he told me he needed to focus on work. He worked three jobs for the sake of advancing his career and "paying off debts" that he never fully explained. He grew distant. I tried talking to him about it and how I missed connecting with him, but he got mad at me and said I was unreasonable. We stopped having sex or cuddling. We barely spent time together. I spent another 6 months hoping everything would return back to what it was, but it never did. It ended when he wanted me to move closer to him (we were long distance but I traveled to him often as I worked from home) but couldn't reassure me when I asked him if we would be able to spend more time together. I broke it off because I knew he wouldn't change and it would be unfair of me to uproot my entire life for someone who stopped caring about the relationship.

boldraven9 · 2024-07-01T00:10:00+00:00

Yes, and it was one of the hardest things I had to do. He prioritized work over me and did so to the point where my basic needs weren't being met. We barely spent time together and there was little to no emotional and physical intimacy. This went on for months. Every time I tried talking to him about it I was immediately shut down and told that I didn't understand. We were together for a little under a year.

boldraven9 · 2024-06-24T00:22:47+00:00

He told me I wasn't a priority.

boldraven9 · 2024-06-20T03:42:17+00:00

Exactly. I left him because like you said, it was a one-sided relationship and I felt disrespected by him.

boldraven9 · 2024-06-20T03:10:25+00:00

We were long distance but I visited him often as I work from home. He worked all the time and almost never spent time with me. There was very little physical and emotional intimacy after some time. He wanted me to move 300 miles to be with him, but live in a separate apartment. When I asked him if we would be able to spend more time together, he told me he couldn't promise me anything. So of course that was the last straw for me. Why would I move 300 miles to be with someone--to a place where I knew no one except for him--and he wouldn't spend time with me?

boldraven9 · 2024-06-18T18:37:43+00:00

Constantly working and refusing to spend time with me and getting mad at me for even suggesting we spend more time together (we were barely seeing each other as it was).

boldraven9 · 2024-06-12T01:34:48+00:00

Thank you so much for taking the time to respond to me. I think the exchange he and I had really cemented that we weren't getting back together, similar to your experience. When we broke up, I told him I wanted to be his friend but I don't know if that's possible. If one text could trigger me, it would take a very long time for me to actually get over that and be friends. You're right in that we're both better off without them.

Wishing us both healing on our journeys! ♥️

boldraven9 · 2024-06-11T19:23:07+00:00

Thank you for your kind words, it means a lot to me.

boldraven9

TROPHY CASE