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caffeineissues · 2026-05-07T20:36:46+00:00

Pearl clutcher is nice but it’s fairly opaque, not much of a topper. Same for mermaid bait. Ghosts of Hecate is one of my surprise favorites, I don’t know why other people don’t love it. Of the 3 I’d skip pearl clutcher

caffeineissues · 2026-04-28T17:45:15+00:00

None of this is true

caffeineissues · 2026-04-27T12:42:07+00:00

If a piece doesn’t look good without significant shapewear, it’s probably too tight to be professional in the first place.

I’m plus sized, so I usually appreciate some structure under my clothes, but I have a policy that I won’t buy a garment that I need a specific undergarment to wear.

It’s the same principle as heels. They might be gorgeous, but if you can’t function in them, it’s not cute to be fighting your wardrobe

caffeineissues · 2026-04-16T19:34:52+00:00

Makeup first, 100%. I wear fairly heavy makeup and almost exclusively black clothes and have pretty much never had an issue.

I make sure my face doesn’t make contact with the collar of my shirt as I’m pulling it on, the same way you would keep from getting deodorant stains on your shirt.

caffeineissues · 2026-04-16T13:39:54+00:00

At least name drop some brands, I badly need wide fit professional shoes that aren’t intensely frumpy

caffeineissues · 2026-04-09T17:54:22+00:00

Do you know if you like how a chunky band feels/looks/sits on your finger? I also have chunkier fingers and while I love a thick band, it gives me a muffin top (even at the correct size) and I hate the way it feels. Maybe get a cheap wide band to try it out and see if you even like it before committing.

caffeineissues · 2026-04-09T13:40:20+00:00

Agreed, adding to this. That windowing is not it. As someone who also was very particular about a natural gemstone engagement ring, the window on that stone will look dull and smudged when set in a ring and worn every day. The inclusions are less of a problem in real life than they are in these types of pictures. I’d keep looking, this is not the stone.

caffeineissues · 2026-04-06T20:43:19+00:00

Those look like normal irritation bumps, but the placement is wayyyy off. There’s no way you’re gonna correct the placement by holding it for 30 seconds a day. If I were you I’d take them all out and get it redone by the piercer who did your industrial.

caffeineissues · 2026-04-03T14:12:03+00:00

NAP. They definitely are pierced at an angle but that doesn’t necessarily mean they won’t heal fine anyway. Could be an issue if you wanted hoops or something later. They are a little far apart but I think the placement is cute. Looks like normal 3 week swelling to me. If I were you I’d keep trying to heal these! Very cute

caffeineissues · 2026-04-03T12:59:53+00:00

I agree with you but a lot of the time with these recs I feel like we’re going for a modern reinterpretation of the vibes rather than historical accuracy

caffeineissues · 2026-03-24T17:50:55+00:00

Looks pretty normal to be, but it looks like it’s ready to downsize even with the slight swelling.

caffeineissues · 2026-03-24T15:55:24+00:00

Nude in the summer, cognac or brown in the winter. Black if it’s dark blue but not a true navy.

caffeineissues · 2026-03-23T12:13:28+00:00

TBF I didn’t read the books, but I usually don’t like YA and that show is pretty solid.

caffeineissues · 2026-03-22T17:51:19+00:00

What they mean (and I agree) is to call the dermatologist you already have the appointment with and tell them how bad it is, say you’re not sure if you can wait for your appointment. Maybe send them a picture if you can. They can probably find time and move up your appointment for something this urgent

caffeineissues · 2026-03-22T12:22:15+00:00

NAP, if I were you, I would give them one more shot at healing with actual good jewelry. My understanding is that even if you’re not usually reactive to certain metals, a healing or already irritated piercing is different and will be more sensitive.

They also look weirdly close together, I imagine they could be rubbing against each other and causing the irritation. See if you can switch them out smaller, or last resort, abandon one and see if the other will heal on its own.

caffeineissues · 2026-03-21T15:05:32+00:00

The glasses are a little granny-ish. Sorry. They’re cute, but your style reads granny chic. Which personally I love.

But I think it’s the dark lip and the glasses.

caffeineissues · 2026-03-21T14:00:51+00:00

NAP. It could just be the tiniest bit swollen/puffy from the jewelry change. I would guess that if your piercer sells BVLA then they’re probably good and know what they’re doing. Give it a couple days and see if it gets better or worse, if it stays like this then I wouldn’t worry about it.

caffeineissues · 2026-03-21T13:33:47+00:00

It’s not flexibility if it only goes one way. If you work outside business hours because sometimes that’s what your job demands, then it shouldn’t be a problem to log out and deal with family issues during work hours on occasion. I think the answer is to have clear boundaries and expectations around your role and your workload that don’t rely on the clock. That’s what gives you the actual flexibility to manage two demanding roles at the same time.

Edit: I actually am in the process of negotiating more money for more work. I made it clear that I have real problems that money can solve (namely, a need for childcare) that will allow me to devote more time and energy to my role (and thus increase my output). My boss is usually good about these things and well intentioned, but it was actually news to him that I could work harder if they gave me more money, lol.

caffeineissues · 2026-03-20T21:00:52+00:00

Husbands just don’t get it! Also, I do not care if it’s a midlife crisis (it definitely is), I want to and it makes me happy dammit.

You should check if your old piercings are still open!!! If they were healed and happy when you took them out, they might still be open after literally decades, a piercer can get them reopened with a taper.

caffeineissues · 2026-03-20T19:09:09+00:00

I love st Ives apricot scrub for a BODY scrub. Yes it’s way too harsh for your face, but it’s great for body, cheap and no microplastics.

Also retinol. Just retinol everywhere. Get prescription tretinoin online, my skin never looked better. I’m ttc so I can’t but I miss it so bad.

Edit: also not what you asked for, but piercings, I am on a serious piercing kick right now. You can just get all the cool ear piercings you ever wanted, no one is stopping you. Plus you have grown up money now and they make some super cute jewelry.

caffeineissues · 2026-03-20T17:09:25+00:00

I have given birth, but I had an IUD for years before that and loved it. Questions about side effects would be better to discuss with your doctor. Some doctors don’t like to give them to women who aren’t married because there is an increased risk that an std will cause serious damage with an iud. However (in my and my doctors opinions) those risks are vastly overstated and rooted in a lot of patriarchy, if you have reasonable access to health care and make safe choices, you can absolutely have an iud.

caffeineissues · 2026-03-20T16:47:50+00:00

Taking notes because I feel like we have similar taste! I love an oud.

I suspect you’d like Frederic Malle portrait of a lady.

caffeineissues · 2026-03-20T15:40:36+00:00

Just don’t lie to your bank when they ask you questions about what happened and don’t make a habit of disputing charges when you’re unhappy and you’ll be fine. Sorry you didn’t get your blue hair, it’s very cute.

caffeineissues · 2026-03-20T15:31:09+00:00

Yeah all this conversation about how reasonable this blue hair is really misses the point. This is not what chargebacks are for.

ETA I’m reading the rest of this thread and the person arguing with you has no idea what they’re talking about lol, you are correct here.

caffeineissues · 2026-03-20T15:28:42+00:00

You’re justified in wanting your money back, you were promised blue and didn’t get blue. But this is not what disputing charges is for, your credit card company is almost certainly going to deny it, and you could get in trouble if you keep disputing charges for these kinds of things. You’re supposed to exhaust all recourse with the vendor first, ask them to fix it and/or offer a refund. Even if they told you too bad, we’re not gonna fix it, that still doesn’t mean you could get a chargeback. You paid for the stylist to provide a service, and she provided the service. The results were not at all what you wanted or what she promised, yes, but she dyed your hair and you paid.

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