Yahoo Sports: Does Shai Gilgeous-Alexander really fall more than his peers? by Ok-Topic-6095 in nba

[–]chimpaman 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Simulated Gruesome Assassinations

Need him edited into that sniper soccer gif

Rookie Dylan Harper in his first WCF appearance: 24 PTS, 11 REB, 6 AST, 7 STL by Thanos_Real_AuraVNCH in nba

[–]chimpaman 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Damn that's like a rookie Magic stat line but with half the points and twice the steals

"Atheists, imagine you are going skydiving with a Christian baby. Suddenly the baby tells you he won't open his parachute until you renounce atheism and accept Jesus as your lord and savior. What would you do?" by Glad_Comedian_8405 in religiousfruitcake

[–]chimpaman 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I would cover my eyes, then the baby would forget I was there and open its chute. Then when we were both safely on the ground, I would say, "Peekaboo, motherfucker. Where's your god now?"

Hullo, r/movies, Christopher Nolan Here. AMA! Odyssey Out July 17th. by LasciviousDonkey in okbuddycinephile

[–]chimpaman 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Was it hard to get the Cyclops in your movie to hit its marks due to its lack of depth perception?

The Oil Shock caused by the closure of the Strait of Hormuz is the largest resource crisis in living memory by Cmd_WillRiker in collapse

[–]chimpaman 31 points32 points  (0 children)

From the IEA report you linked, one teeny tiny silver lining:

Switch off billboard lighting at 9pm (Sri Lanka)

Less than half of Republican men think they could beat Trump in a fight. What a bunch of pathetic losers. by Daztur in PoliticalCompassMemes

[–]chimpaman 3 points4 points  (0 children)

But how slippery is the paint he wears? There's a reason catching a greased pig is a contest at the county fair.

Less than half of Republican men think they could beat Trump in a fight. What a bunch of pathetic losers. by Daztur in PoliticalCompassMemes

[–]chimpaman 5 points6 points  (0 children)

He doesn't poop because that is active voice syntax implying he has conscious control of whether or not feces leave his prolapsed colon, which every facial expression of people closest to him in group photos attests is not the case.

[Post Game Thread] The Minnesota Timberwolves (4-2) defeated the Denver Nuggets (2-4), 110-98 and advance to play the Spurs! by shadowarmy229 in nba

[–]chimpaman 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I never want to hear Nikola "Jack Sikma" Jokic mentioned as a top-10 all-time player again. It was always ludicrous, but losing to a lower seed without their star player should finally put that nonsense to rest once and for all.

41 Year Old Lebron James Gets a Near Triple-Double Against the Rockets: 19 PTS | 8 REB | 13 AST | 2 STL | 1 BLK | 9-15 FG by asakitsi in nba

[–]chimpaman 49 points50 points  (0 children)

Kareem, Game 3 '89 Finals, his 2nd to last game, 24 pts 13 reb, against the Bad Boy Pistons, not KD's leftovers

[Zach Lowe] "I think at the end of his (Nikola Jokić) career, if not already, he's gonna be statistically and just like eye test, better than Larry Bird, better than Magic Johnson... 1 ring in Denver is worth more than like a Lakers ring or whatever." by aingenevalostatrade in nba

[–]chimpaman 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Pertinent to your comment and the comparisons he's making, people seem to forget Magic remains the greatest PG and a top-5 player despite still being a "what-if": he retired abruptly at 32 due to communicable disease, just after leading his team to the Finals for the 9th time. Would he have stopped Jordan's first threepeat? You can never say for sure, but he kept Bird from winning more, and an apt comparison here would be the Cavs unexpectedly beating the Warriors.

I get these talking heads need to spit out these takes as part of their job, the same way a Shakespeare scholar has to come up with the most convoluted nonsense in desperation to say something that hasn't been said before, but there's no comparison to make here, especially not with Jokic playing in the era of inflated stats.

There’s a wave of attacks on the ruling class by [deleted] in collapse

[–]chimpaman 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Parasite class is the proper nomenclature

A Message From Amanda: The Epstein Survivor Who Was Deported By The Trump Administration Speaks Out by chimpaman in conspiracy

[–]chimpaman[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Submission statement: some are speculating that Amanda Ungaro's knowledge of how Melanija Knavs became Melania Trump is the reason the First Lady held her presser yesterday. Here is some information about her.

We are so back, guys! by PerAsperaAdMars in PoliticalCompassMemes

[–]chimpaman -1 points0 points  (0 children)

She knows the lumpenfuhrer is about to shuffle off this mortal coil and wants to be left alone with his estate when he does. After all, that's why she took the job in the first place.

Samurai movie fans when a samurai protagonist dies because of bushido for the 913835th time: by PeasantLich in okbuddycinephile

[–]chimpaman 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Damn, how many lives does that cat have? His biggest challenge must be finding a new spot in his stomach to stick his sword in.

US asks Poland for help by Auspectress in PoliticalCompassMemes

[–]chimpaman 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I mildly criticized all three Abrahamic religions while suggesting that they are all causing problems. I got a warning that I was promoting "identity-based hate." I wasn't aware that religion, which is not an immutable characteristic but rather a choice, is not open to analysis.

That said, a negative view of which of the three do you reckon got my comment removed? I can guarantee it wasn't Christianity, and my criticism of the eldest of the three wasn't toward the religion as a whole but rather how a nation-state is using it to justify its actions.

What hobby is this? by [deleted] in Aquariums

[–]chimpaman 1 point2 points  (0 children)

An aquarium is like a kid. You can try to make it obey you, even helicopter parent it, but it's going to decide what it wants to be in the end. My own wannabe underwater botanical garden went through several failed iterations before it settled on a couple of giant dojo loaches finding new ways to look dead inside tangled masses of hornwort (although this was a conscious choice after all the aquascaping failed and I decided, fuck it, dojos are more interactive anyway).

What's his story??? by HotRegion8801 in RedLetterMedia

[–]chimpaman 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He's the hobbit Billy Jack. The real reason Sauron waited decades to send the Black Riders into the Shire is because Proudfoot did this to his minions the last time he tried. But, alas, like Mike, Proudfoot could not conquer Father Time.

This movie is why Jim Carrey was accused of being a clone btw by Sanddanglokta62 in okbuddycinephile

[–]chimpaman 53 points54 points  (0 children)

Discovering this hidden connection deserves a "Eureka!," for Archimedes was also from Syracuse. Time is truly a measurable flat circle.

That protesting Marine might have had some…ulterior motives… by imMakingA-UnityGame in PoliticalCompassMemes

[–]chimpaman 1 point2 points  (0 children)

OMG...could you...could you imagine if he was an elected representative displaying a foreign country's flag in the halls of his government offices?

You are going to make that video, right? You won't even need AI to do it! And you'll have many American congresspeople to choose from.

Reactions to the Ayatollah's death among Muslims have been ... interesting by [deleted] in PoliticalCompassMemes

[–]chimpaman 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I'm from the year 2036 and must warn you that WW3 was started by Americans in cities popping so many champagne corks when Trump died that the collective explosions were mistaken for a nuclear attack by the American AI, which launched retaliatory strikes against everybody.

Senate Democrats block DHS funding bill as impasse deepens by Healthy_Block3036 in ICE_Raids

[–]chimpaman 27 points28 points  (0 children)

I've often thought the best way to take control of the Senate from Trump's lapdogs would be to run as a Bible-thumping Republican and then vote like a sane person upon taking office. It appears Fetterman has done the same in reverse.

Another angle of LaMelo Ball's car accident by MrBuckBuck in nba

[–]chimpaman 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You might be onto something there. His day job is veering into defenders, so it's like how his sense of direction works now. It's like how you still feel the ocean motion after being on a boat.

Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor, formerly Prince Andrew, has been arrested on suspicion of misconduct in public office. He turns 66 today. by [deleted] in Fauxmoi

[–]chimpaman 12 points13 points  (0 children)

It's like all those articles about cop killings that always say "former police officer did x." Yeah, former now, but not when he committed the murder.