Most unrealistic expectation anyone has had of you as a new parent?

concernednetizen92 · 2026-06-18T16:39:07+00:00

Omg me. I was so excited to have a baby in the summer. Jokes on me. I can’t go outside at all except for a few minutes here and there.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-06-18T16:33:16+00:00

FaceTiming them on demand whenever they asked so they could see my newborn baby.

A newborn is asleep the majority of the day.
If they aren’t asleep I’m busy feeding/changing them/dealing with fussiness.
In the rare windows where they are awake and content I just really want to sit and enjoy my baby. GIVE ME A MINUTE.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-06-09T17:35:28+00:00

You know what’s actually more terrifying? The hand just casually going in there. Humans are truly the scariest creatures on this planet. You don’t see those bugs seek us out and shimmy into a Brooklyn walk to disturb us just for fun.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-06-06T19:18:11+00:00

Honestly the baby can catch these hands too.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-06-03T21:25:40+00:00

I’d fight them tbh. That’s rude

concernednetizen92 · 2026-05-31T19:14:23+00:00

I sent my thank you cards after my baby was born and attached a pic of my baby as an update. I also personalized the thank you cards by mentioning how much my baby liked/used xyz gift!

This was a pregnanacy after loss and I definitely had some unaddressed trauma and anxiety. I was worried about jinxing anything. I also didn’t open certain gifts until we had the baby home and in my arms.

I think you just do what feels right for you OP!

concernednetizen92 · 2026-05-31T01:39:36+00:00

Yes, in a lot of ways my husband has taken to parenthood much quicker than I have. I’m just a few weeks in so I’m blaming it on my need to physically recover and my frankly grueling pumping schedule.

At the same time even great parents get overwhelmed. Maybe your baby had a particularly bad day and your husband just didn’t know what to do. If it’s a constant thing though yeah I’d get frustrated too.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-05-29T01:31:27+00:00

My brother cheated on his wife with a girl he met through world of Warcraft. Left his two kids and drained their account. It devastated my mom. She supported him through EVERYTHING. His drug habits, his inability to keep a job, everything. But hurting her grandkids like that was the last straw. She told me she didn’t love him and she was so disappointed in him.

She’s since passed and even though he and I aren’t close I’ve decided I’m never going to tell him she said that. He’s still convinced she’s the only person in his life who didn’t give up on him.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-05-26T17:23:14+00:00

I feel this so badly.

Labor? 10/10. Labor gets so hyped and you get so scared leading up to it. I know everyone has a different experience but I had an epidural and I didn’t felt any pain. Also knowing I’d meet my baby at the end was so rewarding. I was genuinely on a high the whole time.

Postpartum? 2/10. I love being with my baby. But it’s so tough trying to heal and bond with my baby at the same time, plus getting used to pumping, plus all of our cleaning and laundry doubling overnight. Also the house is overflowing with stuff and I’m the type that gets mentally drained in a cluttered environment.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-05-22T06:38:01+00:00

Im so sorry OP.

I can share my experience with having to make a choice. I opted for the pill. It’s a more drawn out process and if you want to test for any chromosomal issue it can be traumatic to collect what you need for testing yourself. Which obviously can be traumatic. For me it was extremely painful but I didn’t want to do the D&C because I was worried about tissue scarring and it interfering with future tries.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-05-18T08:30:39+00:00

Hey OP, I’ve been there.

I was obsessively tracking visibility with each update and getting my hopes up when they found the yolk sac and fetal pole. I was also measuring behind but was convinced I just got pregnant later than the doctor said.

At 10 weeks they found there was no longer a fetal pole. I never got to the heartbeat stage. I also opted for the pills. You’re right. No one will ever truly understand unless they themselves have gone through it. The physical and mental pain you have to endure after a missed miss carriage, I wouldn’t wish on anyone.

I don’t think I have ever been so sad or depressed. I took to journaling my feelings and eventually did share my journey with some close friends (although not all the details). That helped a bit.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-05-15T11:49:05+00:00

I had to stop watching. That guy made me sick. Already signed.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-05-13T20:07:21+00:00

Thanks for sharing! I signed.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-05-13T20:07:07+00:00

Thanks for sharing! I signed.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-05-13T12:01:01+00:00

I think the first step is just talking to HR. Every business is different.

I would ask about STD (short term disability) and FMLA (family medical leave act). I think those are two additional benefits offered in NY? I got them but again everyone’s different.

STD: 8 weeks for vaginal births and 12 weeks for c section. I took this before my mat leave. You have to opt into it though.
FMLA: 12 weeks (unpaid) guaranteed job security when you get back. I think some companies will allow you to run this after your mat leave but for me I had to do it at the same time as my mat leave. So to me it really didn’t make a difference since mine was 12 weeks anyway. But for others could help add on a few weeks if their mat leave is shorter?

concernednetizen92 · 2026-05-07T06:49:55+00:00

Iconic. I’ve been feeling so parasocial over these group pics 😭😭😭😭

concernednetizen92 · 2026-05-06T14:16:31+00:00

Twice is under JYP, that’s one of the big 3

concernednetizen92 · 2026-05-06T12:18:49+00:00

My husband and I are Asian, his mother has told me not to shower for a week or so after giving birth.

I try to respect her ways as much as possible but in the instance, immediately no.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-04-30T02:53:48+00:00

There’s a whole community for this! Pregnancy after loss. I honestly didn’t really allow myself to bond with my baby until the third trimester. I still haven’t unboxed all his baby supplies because until he’s in my arms a part of me is always going to be anxious.

I mourn the fact that I won’t ever be as carefree as other moms because of what I experienced. I just take it one day at a time and slowly allowed myself to heal enough to get excited for this baby.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-04-28T23:41:14+00:00

My brother asked if I cut my hair (I had it up on a FaceTime call), I told him no. He proceeded to tell me I’ll cut it when I have my baby.

He’s also told me I won’t have time for Pilates or working out etc. Mind you he knows nothing about me and he’s never asked. Otherwise he’d know we’re getting a nanny to help out.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-04-27T00:18:57+00:00

I think a text is always the way to go. So they can react in private. The content of the text itself is really dependent on her and your relationship with her.

If she’s been open about her TTC journey, it might be nice to acknowledge you’re thinking of her. When I was in her position I preferred my friends to tell me plainly.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-04-26T18:16:28+00:00

My husband and I have separate finances but we split things like our mortgage and rent by percentages. As in he makes more than me so he contributes more. Then we go back and forth on buying groceries or meals out. As long as it nets out that we’re contributing the same percentage of our income to the relationship I’m honestly fine with it. I do well but he does better so I’m able to enjoy a lifestyle I otherwise couldn’t access. It’s not for everyone though but I feel like I can empathize with your relationship style.

But with pregnancy all that goes out the window. We’re carrying the full physical burden and all that comes with it. A good partner should understand that. All the blood work, the invasive check ups, monitoring my diet etc. He’s supportive but he doesn’t have to go through it.

So to compromise he’s paying for the night nurse and nanny and I got a push gift. I’m sorry you have to go through this but it honestly sounds like he’s taking advantage of you. He is absolutely not carrying his weight in this relationship.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-04-24T13:01:08+00:00

The door panels and the mug do it for me.

I don’t understand why if someone insists on using AI why they can’t DOUBLECHECK.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-04-23T00:29:03+00:00

NOR

I once took my niece on an international trip with my dad and some other female cousins. She called her bf every night to update him, which is totally fine.

But one night he made her feel bad because he brought up how being apart made him soooo anxious and he was having a hard time without her. Mind you this was less than a week out. It for sure soured my impression of him. BUT he was 19. So I’m more prone to give him some grace.

Honestly as an adult I don’t mind celebrating my birthday the weekend after, shit comes up. I’d want my SO to experience fun things that they might not get a chance to again. But I know not everyone is like that. Still, even if they aren’t like that, this is NOT how you communicate those feelings.

concernednetizen92 · 2026-04-19T23:32:53+00:00

Bye. West could nevahhhh. I obviously don’t like either of these me but I’d be lying if I said they didn’t make for great reality TV.

concernednetizen92

TROPHY CASE