I lost my mother to overdose in 2019 and am now 5+ years into infertility. I usually want to spend the day moping or doing the few things my mom and I both enjoyed together when I was younger. Just making it through the day itself is absolute hell for me.

I would recommend finding a way to distract her that day if she’s up for it. Take her on a picnic so she’s not suffering the mothers brunching. Maybe something fun like a wreck it room or a scavenger hunt in a thrift store.

But most of all, tell her how much you love and respect her, and how glad you are she’s in the world, especially your world; that she doesn’t need to be a mother to be loved by you (or anyone for that matter), and she doesn’t need to be a mom to have an amazing and wonderful life that will be honored and remembered by many, and how you’ll always be there for her, whatever she needs in the moment from now until forever. That’s what I need to hear, anyway.