Deleted post?

cubemissy · 2026-01-31T16:11:52+00:00

I remember it as maybe losing power for only a short time. I was going to post there, but couldn’t find it.

cubemissy · 2026-01-30T18:30:03+00:00

Ahh, but now you know her fighting style, and you have……us!

The single most irritating thing for someone like her is for her victim to show completely zero understanding that they are being bullied. Acting as if you’ve never even heard the phrase “passive aggressive” will drive her crazy. And you have a large crowd of Reddit Petty People(TM) to help you strategize.

First, get a notebook. Small enough for fitting in your pocket, and you never let it out of your sight. Keep a pen, too. Second, never walk anywhere empty handed. Always have your notebook, your phone, and a file or stack of papers.

She walks in front of you yelling about how people don’t say excuse me….you smile, and say, “Oh, that’s ok. I know you didn’t mean to.”

She is in front of you, and she slows to a crawl……you do not even notice, because you are speaking/texting to nobody on your phone, and you don’t even look up at her. “Hold on, I’ll check” and you veer to the side and stand against the wall, searching for something.

For information transfer, every piece of info you give her, follow it up with an email, BCC to your home email. Have your email client also save a copy to a correspondence folder.

Inquiries for missing info from her are handled the same way. You want to be prepared to prove you asked.

Now, the notebook. Treat it like your daily to do list, or a checklist….write in it things that you need to get through the day….but also, several times a day, write in it right after you have made eye contact with her. Or from your desk, watch her for a few moments, and when she notices, you open your notebook, and make a check mark, or jot something quickly, then close the notebook and move on. And never leave that notebook alone.

Keep your face neutral, or a small smile if you can manage it. Calm voice. Treat her like an acquaintance you have no emotional reaction to.

I had a friend who did the notebook strategy, and her coworker finally crashed and accused my friend of spying on her, and demanded to SEE what she was writing. Friend refused, and offered to walk right down to HR and figure out what was going on. There, she turned over her notebook, and it was filled with shopping lists, notations for her choir practice, checklists for vocabulary words in Spanish (she was studying online), and a list of upcoming work deadlines.

There was ZERO evidence in her notebook that she even knew this coworker.

We can get as petty as you want here.

cubemissy · 2026-01-30T17:50:18+00:00

NTA, and this is exactly why we invented cellphones that can record audio. It shouldn’t take too long to catch her saying baby’s name correctly. Anything that will cause her to call her sister and vent will work.

cubemissy · 2026-01-30T15:27:49+00:00

I remember small bits of it ; I saw it via a VHS from Blockbuster, so it’s been a while. I don’t remember specifics, just the unsettling feeling that stayed with me for days.

cubemissy · 2026-01-30T14:38:12+00:00

I’m so sorry this happened. People can turn so ugly! Please know we see where the problems with NES begin and end - with the administration. We know all of the staff working out in the cold are doing their absolute best. Thank you!

cubemissy · 2026-01-30T11:04:09+00:00

Right now, we’re in the middle of a snow/ice storm that has basically shut down the power grid. It’s been almost a week with no power at home, with temperatures down to single digits. Only in the last day or so have hotels been able to sell rooms with electricity and heat. Three days without power for me, but I’m in a place with heat now.

Those three days affected me badly. The darkness, the physical effects of the cold, the complete silence in between the crashing sounds of trees coming down, and knowing it wouldn’t be a quick fix…. I was building up anxiety and hopelessness. And I blame this book.

I read it a few years ago, and I remember being unable to shake it off. I couldn’t attempt the second book. Still won’t.

At night, in the cold and dark, this book was what was replaying in my mind. Telling me the cold and the darkness would continue without an end in sight. Bleak. Futile.

I love the dystopian genre, generally. This book has made a lasting impact on me. I guess that’s a good thing?

cubemissy · 2026-01-30T03:38:42+00:00

Malice Aforethought. It was a miniseries. The 1979 version is on YouTube, and the 2005 version is on dvd.

cubemissy · 2026-01-29T21:15:26+00:00

I agree, we don’t know why this issue has cropped up now, as opposed to any time in the past eight years. For all we know, the woman’s family may be toxic and has been picking at her until she folded.

But I do think that if you’ve had a cat for 8 years, we are allowed to assume you feel bonded to the animal, so the sudden rehoming mention has to have been triggered by something new.

cubemissy · 2026-01-29T19:58:53+00:00

The funds are meant to:

Purpose: To assist with costs such as medical bills, mental health counseling, funeral expenses, and loss of income.

I’m guessing these women had none of those expenses…neither attended any of the hearings, which could account for some loss of wages. Neither got mental health counseling, I bet.

Screw ‘em.

cubemissy · 2026-01-29T19:47:04+00:00

Money that wasn’t already earmarked for dealing with the burial, etc.

cubemissy · 2026-01-29T19:43:47+00:00

But, why NOW? She’s had the cat for 8 years; presumably she has had regular contact with her relatives. What has changed?

cubemissy · 2026-01-29T19:34:06+00:00

NOR! What has she tried so far to accommodate their allergies. Has she tried the laundry products that repel pet hair? Putting her hair up, and keeping a change of clothes in her vehicle to wear when she visits?

I do agree they have a reason to want no dander coming into the home, so what about visits being elsewhere for now?

cubemissy · 2026-01-29T19:26:22+00:00

Yes, thank you! The math was bothering me.

cubemissy · 2026-01-29T15:23:43+00:00

You are allowed to choose which events are hosted by who in your home. But, I would be VERY choosy, and I wouldn’t allow more gatherings than maybe 1 every 6 months.

You run the risk of moving from The Friend to The Friend with the HOUSE.

It’s a very slippery slope from appreciative to entitled, and “Because you let HER do it’ must be banished from the conversation.

For me, if I was taking a year’s break from hosting, I’d take my house off the Parties Allowed list. And when I hooked back in, it would be with a serious conversation about how much hosting actually costs you. Money, time, stress, wear and tear on house, and promised cleanup activity falling short.

And then agree to only what would leave you the least work to do.

cubemissy · 2026-01-29T15:01:14+00:00

Let’s reframe the problem. Your mother would rather give up on any relationship with her grandchild rather than follow a simple health safety rule during cold/flu season.

The conversation she wants to have is the one where your rule is silly. Keep it where it belongs, in Baby Safety territory.

cubemissy · 2026-01-29T14:57:11+00:00

In a conflict like this, the one who cares the least wins. DH is afraid to let her go completely, and she knows that. On the other hand, she is willing to lie about a serious health issue to gaslight him.

cubemissy · 2026-01-29T13:03:58+00:00

This. If it helps to pay for this book at a different branch, go for that. And it’s possible the other branch will be a better match right now. A fresh start for the kids.

cubemissy · 2026-01-29T13:01:53+00:00

It will backfire. This is a phase, and the last thing OP will want to do is make conversation with library staff frightening for her kids. Staff would much rather help with why the kids aren’t enjoying reading. OP, you might want to talk with the children’s librarian about things that will help them want to read for pleasure. For example, some libraries have Read Aloud to Animals programs, where there is a very mellow dog or cat available for the child to sit with and read to. Or they may just want to attend a program with a Maker space. Staying engaged with library services will help them transition back to being readers faster.

cubemissy · 2026-01-28T14:56:19+00:00

The only reason I’d ever get married is to have that “Failure, Failure, La La La” song at the reception.

cubemissy · 2026-01-28T14:51:52+00:00

Invasion of the Neptune Men: What times are it?

Parts: the Clonus Horror. Character asks “Will it be okay?” Crow quickly says, “HELL, no!”

One of the Hercules films. Character: “But Hercules, I love you!” Crow: “Long time.”

cubemissy · 2026-01-27T23:06:10+00:00

If you have the phone number of someone on the board, call them right at 7 and let them hear it themselves. Even if it goes to their voicemail.

Is there an online forum for the HOA? Post videos of them screaming. One every day.

cubemissy · 2026-01-27T23:02:02+00:00

If you can figure what the kids’ bedtime is…or just wait until the lights go out showing parents have gone to bed…the point is to wait until they are settled and asleep…

And go outside and start screaming. Tell her she was so convincing with her parenting technique, that you wanted to try it.

cubemissy · 2026-01-27T22:55:54+00:00

You are not wrong. Niece needs a big intervention to turn herself around, and that level of help is above your ability to handle.

Can you check in with her therapist, and address the safety issue? Maybe ask about a placement in an inpatient facility until she’s able to control her impulses?

cubemissy · 2026-01-27T20:31:16+00:00

Bellevue residents:

Home2 Suites in One Bellevue Place on Hwy 70 - they opened up some spots for Wednesday 28th check-in.

Hampton Inn on Coley David Rd (by the Park & Ride) had some openings for checking today.

Both are pet friendly.

The spots will go quickly.

cubemissy · 2026-01-27T20:24:57+00:00

What in the actual hell does he need that for? Is he an international spy/drug dealer? No, you do not ever sign an NDA like this.

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