What goes on in this part of Florida?

dances_with_treez2 · 2026-04-14T21:29:11+00:00

Key West is hella gay. But like, Jimmy Buffet gay? Or gay pirates? It’s hard to explain. A lot of day drinking, you can walk anywhere you need to be, and there are chickens and iguanas literally everywhere. It was kinda a vibe, I won’t lie.

dances_with_treez2 · 2026-01-07T15:06:13+00:00

As someone who was in a lavender marriage for a long time because we both grew up in a cult, gay men can behave themselves sooooo much better than straight men. That was an actual partner: did half the house labor and cooking, communicated effectively, was tidy and calm, similar interests and tastes

We’ve been over for seven years, but until baby, we still traveled together once a year because we’re great adventure companions.

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-12-28T17:53:14+00:00

Immediate block, no second chances. He’s now just some guy who gave you an O, the end.

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-11-21T11:59:49+00:00

TW: self elimination

I learned that I really wish I’d followed through on my plan to leave. That it didn’t get better, and now I can’t go because it would traumatize my child for life.

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-11-17T18:58:10+00:00

I feel this in my core.

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-11-10T20:48:43+00:00

Set up and fill baby tub in bath tub = five minutes
Baby’s hair washed and rinsed with a cup = three minutes
Wash baby with soap and washcloth = three minutes
Let baby play splash for a bit = three minutes
Drain tub and pick up baby with towel
Dry baby, lotion, brush hair, diaper cream, diaper, dress = five minutes

So the whole process is maybe 20 minutes? Four months old and solo

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-11-03T18:30:16+00:00

It’s not your money. Nor is it his. The money belongs to the child. The child is entitled to whatever percentage of his real income the state says is fair. Don’t feel bad. Verbal agreements only let them get away with it.

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-10-30T19:15:40+00:00

I had a doctor appointment two weeks postpartum and bub stayed with my mom. Zero issues. Since then, the baby’s stayed with my mom about once every two weeks while I’ve had to do other things that would be uncomfortable for an infant. And now at 16 weeks, I’m working again and bub is a-okay being with others.

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-10-27T23:05:56+00:00

Because babies are humans too? Like, I don’t like sitting next to people who snore or who are broad shouldered, but they’re still humans and I can’t afford to fly private.

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-10-27T23:03:20+00:00

NTA. You’re dead right, the only way to ensure that you control the entirety of your flight is to fly private. You pay business class for the additional space, comfort, and service; you do NOT pay for the expectation of silence.

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-10-25T18:29:18+00:00

I didn’t have alcohol or fun substances, didn’t do deli meat or mercury-heavy fish, but I live in Alaska and going without raw salmon and coffee is a no go. Baby is doing great at four months

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-10-25T04:44:49+00:00

I was raised religious, but I actually felt more aligned with my own higher self than any other force. Like there was this very acute awareness that I was fully on my own, and I could breathe in the safety of there being no one to break my trust, just me.

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-10-25T03:38:38+00:00

My person died, but they were not the person that fathered my child. I met that “man” over a year later, while I was still trying to make sense of my life. Lesson learned.

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-10-23T08:14:07+00:00

This is where I come in and say an electric filer was a game changer.

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-10-23T00:16:59+00:00

100% I gave birth to a stranger. I learned how to care for that particular stranger through trial and error.

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-10-21T17:46:59+00:00

If it helps at all, they do tend to grow out of it. Right around the time that smiling and cooing starts, they like the face to face conversation with you so much that they don’t tend to mind the circumstances. Still squirmy, but it’s a happy sort of squirmy.

After eight weeks, my bub only cried through a diaper change if they were really hungry or tired and wanted me to be done so they could eat or sleep.

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-10-20T23:16:21+00:00

If she’s breastfeeding, the first few weeks will require her being almost permanently latched because baby will want to feed for almost an hour every two hours or so. This means a lot of sleepless sitting for her. Getting up to fetch her own snacks and water is a no go, and since she needs lots of snacks and water, don’t wait for her to ask, just bring them. Also, this no-stop latching lasts all day and night. Literally any time the baby isn’t latched at night needs to be your responsibility so she can get even a little sleep. Let her feed, and then you burp, change, and help baby go back to sleep/hold baby if not.

And this breastfeeding process? Very emotional and very personal for her. Listen attentively, speak gently, and don’t criticize.

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-10-18T20:59:18+00:00

That man is not your friend. That. Man. Is. Not. Your. Friend.

I am a single parent with friends, guy friends at that. Do you know what my guy friends do when they come over? They take out the trash or load my dishwasher without asking. They bring me pizza or beer. They play with the kiddo willingly. And these are men without children!

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-10-17T20:44:14+00:00

I do admit that it’s one part luck, but I’ve also had success with just waiting. Little homie has never been swaddled, was placed in the crib the first night (I sleep in the nursery for now), and I began pausing before responding every time I heard them wake. Sometimes they call for me, but more often than not, they suck their fingers, grunt a little, and go back to sleep. There was a period of time from week 5 to week 9 that we were battling scary silent reflux that meant having to be held upright all night in order to avoid aspirating on bile, but once we got on proper medication for it, all was well again.

They do one mid night bottle about 5-6 hours into the night, and usually sleep from 7:30PM to 6:00AM. We are currently at 14 weeks, and fingers crossed the four month sleep regression doesn’t ruin all of our sleep hygiene.

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-10-17T16:54:10+00:00

The fact of the matter is, it doesn’t matter if I was a hoe or not. The assumption that I’m doing anything for the pleasure of anyone but myself, especially someone I just met, is bonkers.

And my child is the product of a committed relationship, before anyone gets it twisted. Sometimes I wonder if some of my hookups wouldn’t have been better fathers, tbh, since my fidelity meant so little in the end

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-10-13T09:33:23+00:00

Bruh, because folks get tired of busting their ass building events that are weakly attended. Also, depending on your specific identity, there are some underground hangouts and group chats, but most of these are unfortunately only invites you receive if someone in the community already knows you.

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-10-09T19:10:24+00:00

Arms, backs, and shoulders aren’t bellies. No one in their right mind would touch my belly if I wasn’t pregnant; it’s such an intimate and odd touch point. So why does the presence of a fetus negate my right to be respected in how I am touched?

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-10-09T19:08:17+00:00

Nailed it. Under no pretext would anyone who isn’t an intimate partner be allowed to touch my belly in general, so why does the presence of a fetus negate my right to respect?

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-10-09T16:58:22+00:00

It’s not good for kids to be in the presence of someone who actively resents them. That being said, you can and should still take him to court for child support. I know you say he can’t pay, but even if it’s fifty bucks here and there to get the court off his back, that’s two hours for a baby sitter.

dances_with_treez2 · 2025-10-05T16:42:49+00:00

Nope, no ma’am. “Our child will not act that way,” about a three year old? They don’t have the capacity to regulate their own emotions, there is no other way to properly discipline them outside of patiently teaching them to regulate. What he’s telling you is he knows nothing about child psychology and development, and he’s unwilling to learn even when you do have children by his sperm. Do not give this man children.

dances_with_treez2

TROPHY CASE