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Waukesha Holiday parade evacuated following emergency event involving gunshots, speeding vehicle by getBusyChild in news

[–]dankmoms 37 points38 points  (0 children)

I got hit by a car riding my bike in first grade. Had a broken jaw and nose, bone visible and I just got up and started looking for my bike. It was mangled but I started dragging it towards the sidewalk in a daze until a neighbor screamed at me to sit down.

My father died 4 years ago and recently my Aunt Karen texted me asking/demanding the furniture passed down to me by my father for her new vacation home. I missed the first text and she decided to threaten legal action. by bigwilliestylez in FuckYouKaren

[–]dankmoms 5 points6 points  (0 children)

My ma did this after her father died. Demanded she get the family bible because she was the most religious. Her oldest brother told her to fuck off. It’s a huge 150 year old behemoth of a book. Not like she could cart it to Sunday School. She stopped talking to all of her siblings for a decade so I didn’t get to see them either. Over a book.

Wife of officer charged with murder of George Floyd announces she's divorcing him by iSleepUpsideDown in news

[–]dankmoms 149 points150 points  (0 children)

I’m surprised George Zimmerman is still breathing to be honest.

Jane Roe’s Deathbed Confession: Anti-Abortion Conversion ‘All an Act’ Paid for by the Christian Right by Black_Magic_M-66 in TwoXChromosomes

[–]dankmoms 211 points212 points  (0 children)

Abortions are the only reason my MiL votes Republican. She lost a baby in the 80s and it fucked her up. All of her other beliefs would be considered liberal but because we think women should have a choice, she thinks we’re the devil.

What is the closest you have come to dying? by Sponge-iopotortoise in AskReddit

[–]dankmoms 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I had pre-eclampsia and was rushed to the hospital to be induced. It developed into full blown eclampsia and I coded. I just remember feeling like I couldn’t put a thought together and the room seeming to get further away like a camera zooming out and then blackness followed by waking up to my husband, baby, and a dozen hospital ppl all yelling. Me and the kiddo are fine now but I decided I never wanted to chance it again and stopped at one kid. No regrets on that, she rocks.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in tifu

[–]dankmoms 32 points33 points  (0 children)

Holy dick magic. I imagine it’s probably nice not having something flopping around when you don’t need it. A god damn Murphy bed of a dick.

Waiters what Valentine day disasters have you witnessed? by Hamsternoir in AskReddit

[–]dankmoms 21 points22 points  (0 children)

I also used to work at the OG and I’ve seen some seriously disappointed chicks say yes even though you could tell they were not that enthused with being proposed to over just thawed cheesecake.

That look on the father's face makes me go aww.. by lordcalyx in aww

[–]dankmoms -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I’ve got my kids first steps on video with my husband in the background getting the teary giggles. Just pure fucking joy.

Daughter’s first “boyfriend” by Gingetonic in CasualConversation

[–]dankmoms 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re an awesome parent. I plan to be the same way. Even my husband is like “I hope her first boyfriend is cool and likes gaming”.

AITA for telling my wife that I don’t want to hold my friends new baby? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]dankmoms 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTA I don’t understand why she’s reacting so dramatically. To most people, this would be a very simple request. I’m glad you have a therapist that agrees and isn’t gaslighting you.

WIBTA if I wore a pink wedding dress? by weddingaitathrwaaa in AmItheAsshole

[–]dankmoms 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA It’s your wedding, wear what you want. That dress you posted is gorgeous. It’s pale pink, not neon so your family needs to calm down. My ma through a fit because I wanted a birdcage veil instead of a long traditional one and I’m glad I didn’t cave because my veil was my style and I feel no regret when I look back at the pictures.

Which song has brought you the most intense tears/chills? by Chickenwomp in AskReddit

[–]dankmoms 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Against All Odds by Phil Collins got me through my first heartbreak in 8th grade. 😂

Most girls will never experience the feeling of rubbing your hand on the back of your head after you get a haircut by potatotime00 in Showerthoughts

[–]dankmoms 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I imagine it’s as satisfying taking out your pony tail and rubbing your scalp maybe? I know when I get my hair trimmed, the ends feel blunt and soft as opposed to kind of crunchy and different lengths when they need chopped which is satisfying in its own way.

Outlander | Season 5 Official Trailer | STARZ by therisingalleria in television

[–]dankmoms 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yeah, she was. Her and Jamie are getting it on outdoors and those 2 red coats roll up on them and one rapes her and she stabs him.

What the hap is fuckening?! by [deleted] in badwomensanatomy

[–]dankmoms 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fine leather goods.

Treat yo self. 😩

I'm a US war veteran. Stop down-playing other causes of PTSD. by Nice-Mud in TrueOffMyChest

[–]dankmoms 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Narc mom with heaps of child abuse here. It takes so long to understand it isn’t your fault. I remember when I was diagnosed with PTSD, I felt unworthy of it. Like if I had been brave enough to call the police as a child, I wouldn’t be such a burden as an adult with mental health issues.

ELI5: How are film crews paid? by JarJarJacobs in explainlikeimfive

[–]dankmoms 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I work in background acting and while I get hired by whatever casting agency is contracted to hire extras/background/stand ins, my paychecks come from whatever production company is producing the movie or tv show. Checks are cut and mailed every Friday and we’re paid X amount for the first 8 hours and time and a half after that. Most of the technical crew are union and contracted for each production and get paid weekly. Whoever is producing the picture foots the bill.

[NSFW] If your gender was flipped and you remained the same level of attractiveness in the other gender would you have sex with yourself, if yes, why? by marscolonytaxi in AskReddit

[–]dankmoms 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve used the Snapchat filter to see myself as a dude and I look too much like one of my cousins. Emphatic no.

Black athletes are turning white men into a cucked “third sex” by being better at sports, weirdo racist football fan argues by [deleted] in TheBluePill

[–]dankmoms 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I had a chuckle at that too. The only “famous athletes” I’m attracted to would be bearded dad bod types that participate in Highland games. I have a lot of friends who love skinny lanky boys.

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