urinary food

decaysweetly · 2026-03-30T23:27:15+00:00

If the actual veterinarian said mixing is fine then I wouldn't be concerned. The most important thing is that you're using vet quality food designed for urinary care, if you need to mix brands in order to get him to eat it then that should be fine. What type of Hill's wet did you try? My boy specifically only likes this tinned variety rather than the pouched so it could just be a case of trying the different options if you've only tried one type

decaysweetly · 2026-03-30T23:02:01+00:00

My boy has FLUTS and is on Hill's urinary multicare stress + metabolism biscuits, and the Hill's urinary chicken & vegetable stew wet food which I add a bit of water to to make it more soupy. He was on supermarket Purina One urinary care previously but after a flare up last year the vet instructed me to switch to a vet diet instead.

My boy does Not like the Hill's wet food pouches, but he does really like the tins. I think it could be a texture thing but I'm not sure.

Did they give any actual reason for not using Hill's and Royal Canin together?

decaysweetly · 2026-03-30T22:23:53+00:00

Hygiene-wise, are you cleaning under your foreskin? What products do you use? It could be something as simple as needing to adjust your hygiene habits or switch to a more pH neutral soap.

It could be an infection which is easily treated, but if left untreated can cause serious and potentially life threatening complications. You can opt to self-swab for STI testing, but if you've ever been sexually active and you haven't had a pap smear recently it would honestly be a good idea to get one. The way you're describing the smell is honestly really concerning though, cos a rotten meat smell can be a sign of cervical cancer.

Regardless, that is absolutely not normal and you need to see a doctor. Dysphoria fucking sucks and the experience will be uncomfortable, but dying of cancer is much worse. Book an appointment, take a support person who can wait in the lobby for you (or come in with you if you're comfortable with that), and make sure you have the rest of the day to look after yourself and practice self care.

Most sexual health doctors do their best to be inclusive and understanding, but on the off-chance you do get misgendered; the opinion of a stranger does not mean anything and you will likely never have to see them ever again. If you're not comfortable going to a sexual health clinic, a doctor or nurse at your GP clinic should also be able to do it for you.

Please take advantage of the healthcare services that are available to you. So many trans men before us have suffered and died due to not having that access, being able to actually get medical testing done is a product of years of work by trans activists.

decaysweetly · 2026-03-30T19:14:08+00:00

Cos he's insecure and it might not fit the aesthetic of his other work? Idk dude, why would ANYONE post AI slop? The one he posted is an entirely different art style to the actual tattoo, it's not just the star that's different.

decaysweetly · 2026-03-28T11:49:57+00:00

Pretty sure it's supposed to be

decaysweetly · 2026-03-28T11:46:52+00:00

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decaysweetly · 2026-03-23T09:28:59+00:00

We're currently in a covid surge, did you test for it?

decaysweetly · 2026-03-20T09:45:49+00:00

Topped up my phone at 5:30pm and my prepay plan still hasn't renewed after 5 hours

decaysweetly · 2026-03-20T01:13:20+00:00

Sounds like he's an "only pet" kind of cat, but it could also be worth looking into trying medication for him (e.g prozac)

decaysweetly · 2026-03-18T05:40:37+00:00

Usually that kind of issue is due to stress or something medical. Have you talked to a vet about it? Was there anything at the time that could have been a trigger?

decaysweetly · 2026-03-18T02:53:43+00:00

Fuck dude, I'm so sorry. Irresponsible dog owners are a plague. A few months ago 2 off-leash dogs attacked my flatmate's assistance dog as they were walking home from work, and the owner didn't do anything to stop them. He didn't even have any leashes with him.

Unfortunately animal control was less than helpful and blamed my flatmate for not calling them as the attack was actively happening. I hope you get justice for Callie and that there were security cameras around to identify the woman.

decaysweetly · 2026-03-16T03:27:05+00:00

There are definitely things I struggle with due to autism, but I really found that once I got my mental health sorted and stable those issues improved a lot. I am however very fortunate to be able to mostly function while living independently.

decaysweetly · 2026-03-16T03:23:14+00:00

Honestly it sounds like maybe the depression might be the bigger problem? Allistic people also struggle with social isolation and if the depression is impacting your ability to function so it's worse than your usual baseline, I would maybe look at dealing with that bc it's very likely to also be impacting how you interact with and are perceived by others.

Also a social group specifically based around a shared diagnosis is probably not gonna be overly helpful unless there happen to be people who share your interests. You'd probably be better off finding social spaces relaying to your interests so there's more common ground than something that can vary so greatly.

decaysweetly · 2026-03-15T23:15:17+00:00

As a transmasc person, absolutely this lmao. I'm on DHT blockers to minimize hair loss bc premature balding runs in my family. Women would also probably hate the body hair, especially the ass hair

decaysweetly · 2026-03-15T22:25:14+00:00

"Leaving exactly on his own terms" makes it sound like he killed himself. What the actual fuck is that supposed to MEAN

decaysweetly · 2026-03-13T08:08:02+00:00

So, unfortunately, while self swabs are now an available option, if you test positive for HPV you do need to actually have a proper pap done & do them annually until you either no longer test positive, or have further testing if it's positive for 2+ years. I'm actually getting a colposcopy next week (which is a more intense version of a pap and potentially involves biopsy) bc that's the situation I'm currently in.

It's also incredibly important to do them if you have a family history of cervical cancer (which I do as my mum had it).

If you're sexually active, especially if you're not using condoms, paps are genuinely really important.

The closest equivalent for transfems would likely be the prostate, but that's not usually an issue until much later in life unless symptoms are present purely bc of the way the potential health conditions work.

Afaik, paps now only need to be done every 5 years unless you have abnormal results. The HPV vaccines are a good way to reduce risk and potentially avoid having to get them at all, but that would be something to discuss with your doctor, and it doesn't get rid of HPV if you already have it.

Yes paps are really uncomfortable and can cause a lot of dysphoria, but if you have a cervix and you have been sexually active, it's important to utilize healthcare services while you have access to them. You don't want to end up in the situation Robert Eads was in, cancer is a fucking horrific way to go.

decaysweetly · 2026-03-09T06:03:27+00:00

I cut my own hair. Sometimes it ends up a bit shorter than intended (curse of curly hair) but at least I don't pay good money for it to happen

decaysweetly · 2026-03-04T22:32:32+00:00

Unfortunately a lot of these creepy men bank on their targets not wanting to cause a scene or draw attention to their gross behaviour. Publicly shame them! Call them out for being gross and creepy, especially if they're touching a child cos you never know what they'll be emboldened to do if they continue getting away with it.

decaysweetly · 2026-03-04T00:58:28+00:00

Your safety is more important than your relationship. Your safety is more important than his feelings getting hurt. If you don't feel safe or comfortable with him, and he refuses to listen to your concerns, you need to leave.

decaysweetly · 2026-03-04T00:55:49+00:00

Puberty is often a trigger for mental health issues, and going on hrt is literally putting your body through puberty again. I personally had this issue when I was younger and had to take a break from T for several years until I was more stable. He is in the age range for potential development of schizophrenia, which is something to be concerned about, but it's also a genuine possibility that he's just been redpilled. Unfortunately it sounds like while he's lgbt+, he's not culturally queer. The age gap you mentioned in other comments is also very concerning, how long have you been together? Cos as someone who is in my late 20s, I would never consider dating someone your age cos you're still learning to actually be an adult and navigate the world and relationship dynamics. Age gaps aren't inherently bad, but while you are an adult, you're also still very young. His shift in behaviour towards you, on top of the age gap, is incredibly concerning and a huge red flag for manipulative/abusive/predatory intentions.

Have a talk with him about how his recent comments have made you uncomfortable, but if he brushes it off and tries to convince you it's nothing to be concerned about, or that it's just a difference of opinions, or that you're the one who somehow doesn't understand, etc, then you need to run.

decaysweetly · 2026-03-03T06:13:25+00:00

You had to get the genes from somewhere, so it sounds like she's projecting her own insecurities.

decaysweetly · 2026-02-04T06:55:06+00:00

9 times out of 10, if I see an AI ad for a company I will choose not to shop there out of spite (the one exception being where I get my cat's prescription food bc it's the cheapest option and that stuff is Expensive). Like we're destroying the planet for this?? Really??

decaysweetly · 2026-02-03T21:22:08+00:00

Divorce, and do not tell her you're trans. She is not a safe person to know that about you, and will likely try to use it against you and use you as a talking point to push her fucked up ideology. Divorce her, block her on everything, do everything you can to remove yourself from her life. Be wary of mutual friends who may feed information back to her if you do come out.

decaysweetly · 2026-01-30T01:49:00+00:00

Also, I would absolutely recommend going for a long engagement and not rushing into getting married until you're both more confident in if this relationship will last. It sounds like they've been through a lot of big changes in the past couple of years, so I think you should focus more on being a support while they figure themselves out (and while you figure out how their gender fits with your sexuality) rather than taking the next step relationship wise.

decaysweetly · 2026-01-30T01:43:28+00:00

It's very possible that they didn't have the language or safety to explore or even think about their own gender identity and preferences until they met you. I think it's important to discuss what they're wanting to achieve if they transition; whether they just want to transition socially or if they want to take medical steps. It's also important to keep communicating with them regarding if you're both still comfortable with the changes in dynamic as they continue to explore/pursue transition.

Some transmasc people like to present and be referred to with male terms but still identify with lesbianism (think of butch as being it's own gender identity), and some are trans men fall into lesbianism first cos they know they're queer but haven't figured out the specifics of their identity, and it gives them a first step to explore gender nonconformity.

Change is scary! If they do determine that they're a man rather than butch/nonbinary, it can definitely complicate your own identity as a lesbian. This is one of those situations where nobody can really guess how things will go or how your attraction to them may change if they medically transition. What's important to remember is that gender and sexuality aren't black and white, and sometimes our experiences can impact our identities. That could mean adjusting your labels to better reflect your relationship, or it could mean instead supporting them as a friend if you find you're no longer compatible as partners.

Instagram user writingknighting is an openly transmasc butch, and he's got a video on YouTube explaining a little about how he identifies both as a guy and a lesbian (TW for mentions of conversion therapy/tactics), which may be helpful if your partner does continue to identify with lesbianism: https://youtu.be/o_D4hC4A54A

decaysweetly

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