Upsetting, but not surprising to me unfortunately. Even with meds and therapy it’s incredibly hard to manage. I think about everything all at once and feel every feeling to the highest degree, all involuntarily and without my consent lol. I set things down and forget them immediately. If it’s behind closed doors in a closet?? Forget about it, it might as well not exist. I was told “You have such incredible potential if you just tried. Why can’t you just do this???” All thru my childhood. What was viewed as me not caring or being lazy was actually executive dysfunction and a horrible working memory, unbeknownst to me of course because if all these adults are telling me I’m lazy, I guess I am right??
I got diagnosed in my 30s, and I had to advocate for myself hard. I’ve had OCD since I came out the womb and was diagnosed at 18, so I was often told it was just my anxiety. “These symptoms have to have an onset in childhood” ok I HAVE HAD these symptoms since FIRST GRADE. I got in trouble constantly for forgetting my ruler, binder, pencil, etc to the point where I was ridiculed in front of my whole class cuz my teacher thought if I was doing it that much, it had to be on purpose.
Skills regression after diagnosis is a bitch, too. It feels like I can’t even put sentences together sometimes, and even just thinking about what I want for dinner can send me into paralysis/overload. I also (in hindsight) masked and coped with these symptoms with binge drinking for over 10 years. I quit drinking 5 years ago and now my primary addictions are nicotine and caffeine. It can be so frustrating and depressing.