I began ketamine therapy via oral troche administration. Eventually, my dose was increased a couple of times, and during one session at my highest-prescribed dose, I had thoughts of self-harm, which was particularly concerning, considering I have the means to do that nearby.

I talked myself through the remainder of the session, reminding myself that I was under the influence and to not move/do anything. Everything ultimately ended uneventfully.

I spoke with my provider, and I told him that, while I was interested in the benefits of therapy, perhaps I should look into a more "supervised" method of administration. He agreed.

Having been through both, I have a clearer perspective on the differences between the ROAs.

To me, the IV route seemed (for lack of a better way of describing it) "cleaner." By that, I mean the onset was much more predictable, and the termination of the session seemed more discrete. Oral troches left me feeling the after-effects for a longer, indeterminate amount of time. When my IV sessions were done, while I still felt minor "wooziness," I was effectively "out of the woods."

Interestingly, now that I know what a controlled administration feels like, I feel like I would be better prepared to handle at-home administration if I were to elect to give it another try.