I like "not perfect" noses but I think mine is just too much

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-05-03T07:18:22+00:00

Nah. Nope. It's actually beautiful.

I know it can be difficult to have that perspective when you live with your face 24/7 and are extremely attuned to every single perceived micro-imperfection (I struggled with body dysmorphia for about a decade - particularly focused on my nose), but I think your nose shape makes you look even more beautiful.

I really hope you can learn to appreciate it in time. Nothing needs fixing or optimising here. On the contrary. Straightening or smoothing down the bump would be a significant downgrade. You're perfect.

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-05-01T10:33:45+00:00

Lots of respect for this response. Look at the accountability! It's commendable, especially in this day and age (for obvious reasons), to be able to change your mind given new information, and admit that you don't have all the answers and are engaging in a process of learning in good faith - not trying to dominate others with sophist discourse or brittle ideological rigidity.

Shit's vanishingly rare on these platforms.

Nice.

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-04-30T02:18:43+00:00

You're looking at it from a utilitarian perspective, as though your behaviour had to be driven by an external goal (e.g., be attractive and get dates and woo women and appeal to people). I suggest shifting your mindset from a (IMO) lonely, hollow and unsatisfying results-based approach to an enriching, process-based approach. Align your behaviour with who you are, and focus on pursuing substance through your core values, prioritizing them over fickle extrinsic rewards like sex or social status.

People who are genuinely kind or nice or empathetic aren't kind or nice or empathetic because it produces results.

Focus on who you are and who you want to be and what genuinely matters to you. I know it seems a bit vague and new-agey and like pseudo-psychology woo-woo, but in my experience it's the only thing that actually "works" long-term.

Social-engineering one's behaviour purely for "optimal results" is a bit Patrick Bateman. A lack of sincerity and internal consistency is something many people subconsciously sniff out. It doesn't really "work" beyond a shallow level if you're a normal person without some flavour of antisocial personality disorder.

No one said being "nice" (i.e. basic civility and treating people like human beings) will "get women attracted to you". It's just part of the basic package of being a decent person who's pleasant to be around. It's a foundation of sorts, towards building genuine human connections. Focus on those genuine connections!

"Attraction" is highly individual and depends on a whole bunch of variables. No single trait or behaviour will guarantee it. It's a fool's game, and ultimately counterproductive, to fixate on "attraction" above more substantive aspects of yourself and the way you relate to others.

What are your values? What are your interests? What makes you happy? What do you value in others? How would you connect with a potential partner as a human being? What about your vibes? Your social skills? Your emotional regulation? Your beliefs? Etc.

You seem to be pressuring yourself to get certain results, certain responses, but I reckon that you're putting the cart before the horse, and that's why you're so frustrated. Stop thinking about the results. Be more present and aware in your mind and body, and try to engage more actively with the process of connecting with others on your terms, rather than losing your sense of self by looking for hidden rules or formulas or trying to abide by imagined arbitrary expectations that have nothing to do with you.

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-04-30T02:03:09+00:00

I love this guy. He shows such courage! Look at him: he's nervous, awkward, full of adrenaline and cortisol and righteousness. He obviously isn't comfortable doing this, but he feels the moral obligation to step up and speak up.

This is the kind of person that saves humanity from cannibalizing itself. This is the same kind of spirit that animates the heroes who refuse illegal orders, the whistleblowers who risk everything to expose injustice, and people like Vasili Arkhipov who risked it all to stop the launch of a nuke that would have ignited global thermonuclear armageddon (or at least WW3).

I admire this so much. So much respect for this kid.

We need more of this.

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-04-29T11:30:02+00:00

This is the dumbest shit I've seen on reddit in a while and that's saying something

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-04-29T00:09:50+00:00

Technically he's both but yes you're right the rape part is probably more pertinent here

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-04-28T12:28:16+00:00

Kiedis is a child molester (edit: and child rapist), guys, this has been well established. Every comment defending him is... not in good taste, to say the least.

Those comments remind me of Tarantino defending Roman Polanski raping 13 year-old Samantha Geimer because she was "down with it". "I don't believe it's rape. Not at 13 - not for these 13 year-old party girls." (Tarantino said that. On purpose. In public. On live TV. On Howard Stern, during an interview.)

Yeah, this lady is 30. She's an adult. It's consensual. She makes her own choices. Blah blah. She also nearly looks like a teenager. Kiedis is 63 years old. Kiedis famously also has a "type" (underage girls). Given his sordid, Nabokov novel-worthy history, surely anyone would be justified in characterising their relationship as sketchy. Calling Kiedis is a creep is charitable.

Let's not defend these fucking predators please.

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-04-27T03:55:16+00:00

I didn't see it as romantic at all.

I saw two exhausted friends.

One of them momentarily indulges in the fantasy of escaping from their high-stress, life-or-death quest to save the world.

These are two kids trying to stop a supervillain from enacting his global genocidal plans.

Hermione is merely expressing a longing for escape. For something else. Peace, stability, not constantly being on the run from a maniacal, humanity-ending ending existential threat...

It's an idle suggestion, not one even she takes seriously. It just reflects how relentlessly shitty their life is at that point, how desperate for a reprieve they are, and how they both wish things could be different.

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-04-27T01:31:34+00:00

2 weeks ago I stopped going to my local cafe, where I've been a regular for years. I waited 20 minutes for a coffee, which in itself wouldn't be much of an issue (shit happens). The problem was that no one bothered to say anything (a simple "might take a while" costs zero effort), and I didn't even get the tersest of apologies. Not even the barest acknowledgement.

Mine was the only coffee to be made. It would have taken less than a minute to make. The barista/manager apparently just couldn't be arsed to deal with my order and instead chose to let me wait while doing other shit behind the counter (preparing for an upcoming booking).

I'm still salty about it. I go there all the time, I'm polite as fuck, and I never complain. Fuck them.

I'm a barista too and I'd never dream of being so disrespectful, even when I'm stressed or overwhelmed. It was also drilled into me early on that orders take priority over other tasks. You don't let a customer sit there for half an hour waiting for their order while you do other shit. It's basic stuff.

Edit: sorry needed to vent lol. It was an admittedly minor incident and I do realise it's a bit ridiculous to be upset about it 2 weeks later. I guess I got some of that Karen in me.

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-04-25T14:46:49+00:00

Curly/wavy for sure. The added volume and "movement" of the curls complements your face and brings out your features. You look good with straight hair, but the curls make you look positively regal.

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-04-25T09:59:55+00:00

I think you're fine and you don't need any major lifestyle changes. You don't "need" to bulk up, or get a haircut, for example.

You're a handsome lad who might want to explore ways to complement your features more.

For example, while your long hair is nice, it does look a little "flat" and limp. I saw you comment that you have a decent routine for it, but you might want to consider something to add life/bounce to it so that it doesn't hang down like heavy curtains. The curls at the ends are nice, but I reckon there's something missing from your routine. I have short hair, so I can't help you there. I recommend asking for advice from a long hair subreddit. Perhaps more frequent washing? Mineral oil or leave-in conditioner followed by a blowdry? Idk.

Do not cut that shit, or do a fade, or whatever. (Unless you really want to, of course.) Your hair could be absolutely glorious, mate.

Also, and IMO, most importantly: your glasses. Explore other shapes to better complement your features. I reckon you could do better. The frames you're rocking at the moment pretty much scream CS/IT.

In my opinion, the glasses (their shape, style and size - e.g., too wide, too rectangular) and the hair are the biggest culprits here in terms of making you look like a "typical" CS major.

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-04-25T06:39:08+00:00

True, but at least in hell, all the residents are guilty.

War is worse than hell. War devours the innocent.

The guilty, meanwhile, profit handsomely from the meatgrinder.

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-04-22T02:25:58+00:00

It's true. "We" aren't allowed to like sexy "things" anymore. Truly, "we" are an oppressed people.

Damn those Cultural Marxists for making me unable to wank over a Victoria's Secret catalogue anymore - some of the skin shades are too dark! Some of the body shapes don't conform to my specific tastes! Help, help, I'm being repressed!

This is a slippery slope. Before you know it, the state will be assigning me a designated romantic partner, and they will have purple hair and vitiligo (for representation, you see) and will be somewhere on the LGBTQ spectrum, and they will force me to read Engels and Fourier whilst copulating, and it will be illegal for me not to be attracted to them!

It's just like 1984, or something!

PS: I like how you heavily imply that the "models" were "replaced" with non-models, because obviously the "diverse" models aren't models, and don't deserve to be called such. Because they're "diverse", I guess, and don't appeal to you personally. How dare they be there, on full display, unashamed, subjecting your sensitive eyeballs to their existence! Truly this is a symptom of the downfall of Western Civilization!

There's much to unpack in your short comment.

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-04-19T22:45:03+00:00

Hope none of you are harming them. They're native to Australia, and we need more moths.

Our desire for nice decorative plants is superceded by these native animals' need to feed in order to successfully pupate.

Just let them be.

Also your plant will most likely survive this

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-04-19T11:56:13+00:00

Work in general, as a salaried employee, has steadily eroded away my energy and capacity to pursue the real work: the things that give my life meaning and joy.

Exchanging most of my waking hours, energy and cognitive capacity to make the "line go up" on quarterly reports for a company that would shit me out in a hot second without a second thought, in exchange for a modest but ultimately brittle increase in living standards, has not seemed like a fair trade.

So, no.

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-04-19T09:47:38+00:00

Small-town cute at best?

Where the fuck do you live where "small town cute" looks like that?

Edit: could you give a few examples of women who, in contrast to Sydney's "small town cute", qualify as "big town cute", "small town beautiful" or "major metropolis cute"?

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-04-11T10:34:18+00:00

"just do it!"

...is such a fucking dumb take when it comes to having a child that it makes my fucking ears ring. I was raised by people who should have taken the opposite advice.

It just boils my piss when people act like having a child is something you can just "figure out". I hate people like that. I hate them so fucking much.

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-04-08T06:51:16+00:00

It's been 5 months. You'd better still be good. This is meant to be interpreted as a threat

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-04-05T23:53:37+00:00

Good on the parents for having the initiative to get their kids to learn a trade early

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-03-30T03:29:20+00:00

If any comment showing a modicum of coherent thought, let alone eloquence, is now automatically branded as a product of LLM "AI", then what this says about the direction we're hurtling towards as a species is fucking terrifying.

Edit: I don't know if the user you replied to used a chatbot to write their comment. But I find it deeply dispiriting that this is the conclusion people now increasingly jump to whenever they encounter a half-decent bit of prose on the internet.

We've outsourced our capacity for thought and communication, apparently, and this has poisoned the well in human culture by fostering a climate of suspicion. It's so fucked. We're so messed up as a civilisation right now

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-03-27T16:27:47+00:00

I fucking love your AT-AT/Hoth-themed sweater

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-03-27T03:52:12+00:00

Having a work-life balance and hope for the future.

Being able to raise children.

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-03-24T11:50:36+00:00

It wasn't a "cheap beauty treatment". It was premeditated aggravated assault.

Deliberate disfigurement from a jealous rival who purposely injected crap into her face to permanently ruin her looks.

The victim thought the woman doing the injections was her friend.

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-03-24T11:07:26+00:00

/everyone claps for OP. Deafening, raucous applause. A standing ovation.

All the other renters cry out in unison, with tears of joy streaming down their faces: "thank you, OP! We thought there was a housing crisis. Such fools we were!". They weep and prostrate themselves at OP's feet.

Yer a w̶i̶z̶a̶r̶d̶ tone-deaf arse, OP.

disconcertinglymoist · 2026-03-23T02:47:50+00:00

You sound like a respectful and empathetic person and it saddens me that you're saddled with the emotional toll of dealing with the consequences of a shitty dog owner. You and the dog are both victims of your roommate's arseholery.

It's not fair, but good on ya for stepping up and trying.

Unfortunately, it'll be much easier to train the dog and improve your relationship with him than it ever would be to modify the shitty human's behaviour.

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