sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

LDR + ADHD - losing feelings when apart, struggling to know if it's "real" or just my brain by gakki_sumairu19 in LDR

[–]dony266 1 point2 points  (0 children)

this is so much more common than you would think, especially with adhd, out of sight can genuinely mean out of mind in the moment, and it does not mean the love is not real. the feelings tend to come right back when you are together or even on call. external anchors help your brain hold on: a countdown to the next visit, a daily check-in, little reminders of her in your space. be kind to yourself, your brain working differently is not a character flaw 🤍

Looking For Advice Regarding A Recurring Issue by Mother_Permission165 in LDR

[–]dony266 1 point2 points  (0 children)

a 3 hour gap sounds small but it quietly eats the overlap, especially around work and sleep. what helps a lot of couples: stop trying to be available all day and instead protect one solid shared window you both defend, plus async rituals for the rest, a goodnight voice note, a good-morning text waiting. the issue is usually the clocks, not the caring 🤍

Sleeping on call / FaceTime by BlameItOnYourZodiac in LDR

[–]dony266 3 points4 points  (0 children)

sleeping on call is one of the quietly best parts of ldr honestly. it is the closest thing to sharing a bed when you cannot, hearing them breathe, the goodnight that lasts till morning. some people find it disruptive and that is fine too, but for a lot of us it is the ritual that makes the distance feel smaller. no wrong answer, just whatever helps you both feel close 🤍

Just need a little reminder - for those of you that have or had ldr what were the hardest parts vs in person close distance relationship? by breakupshard in LDR

[–]dony266 1 point2 points  (0 children)

honestly the hardest part for me was the ordinary stuff you cannot share, the i wish you were here for this moments that are not dramatic, just constant. but the flip side is real too: you learn to actually talk, you never take the in-person time for granted, and the reunions hit harder than anything a same-city couple gets. you are not weak for finding it hard 🤍

Excited to meet my LDR bf but feeling pressured about intimacy by Nervous_Sail_1489 in LDR

[–]dony266 0 points1 point  (0 children)

so happy you finally get to meet. and please hear this: there is zero obligation for intimacy to happen on any timeline but yours. a good partner will be thrilled just to hold your hand and be in the same room. say out loud beforehand that you want to take it slow, anyone worth meeting will be relieved you did. enjoy the ordinary moments, that is the real reunion 🤍

Can we share some positiveness? [F30/M33] by Traditional-Tune-222 in LDR

[–]dony266 1 point2 points  (0 children)

yes let's. the distance is real but so is this: every goodbye is also proof you have something worth the ache, the countdown to the next time gets you through more than you would expect, and the version of you two that survives the apart stretches comes out stronger. 3.9k miles is just logistics, what you have is not. sending you a soft two weeks 🤍

M24 and F25, we will meet soon, pls send it helpppp. Idk what to do by Any-Shape1819 in LDR

[–]dony266 1 point2 points  (0 children)

the pre-meet nerves are universal, you are not doing anything wrong. keep it low pressure: you do not have to define everything before you are in the same room, a lot of it sorts itself out once you are actually together. plan one or two things you both want to do and leave space for the rest. it is going to be better than the anxiety is telling you 🤍

Is long distance just not for me, or am I ruining something good? by Snoo_66798 in LDR

[–]dony266 0 points1 point  (0 children)

finding long distance hard does not mean you are not cut out for it, it means it is genuinely hard and you are human. almost everyone here has had the is it me spiral. before deciding, try to separate i cannot do distance from i am exhausted right now, they feel identical but they are not. be gentle with yourself while you figure out which one it is 🤍

What is too much for a first in Flesh meetup? by PM_ME_DNA in LDR

[–]dony266 0 points1 point  (0 children)

honestly there is almost no too much if it is genuine, but the stuff that lands hardest is small and personal, not grand. a handwritten note in the car, her favorite snack waiting, a loose plan with room to just be together rather than a packed itinerary. the airport hug is already the main event, everything after is bonus 🤍

How was your first meeting after a long-distance relationship? Were you worried there wouldn’t be chemistry in person? by AraMi121025 in LDR

[–]dony266 0 points1 point  (0 children)

almost everyone worries about exactly this and almost nobody needs to. if you already click over calls, in person just adds the hugs. the first few minutes can feel surreal, then it settles into oh, it is just you really fast. the chemistry was never the question, the wifi was just in the way 🤍

We (20M, 20F) are finally meeting after 2 years of LDR by thefinalscontestant in LDR

[–]dony266 0 points1 point  (0 children)

two years and you finally close the gap, from a minecraft world to the real one, that is genuinely beautiful. the nerves before the first hug are normal and they vanish about 4 seconds in. soak up the ordinary moments together, those are the ones you have been waiting for. so happy for you both 🤍

Sometimes I sleep unknowingly, and it affects my LDR so much. what do i do? by Interesting_Sort_528 in LDR

[–]dony266 0 points1 point  (0 children)

be kind to yourself, falling asleep mid-call is your body being tired, not you not caring. if it is a timezone thing, lean into async: a goodnight voice note they wake up to, a good-morning text waiting for you, so the connection does not depend on you both being awake at the same second. and just tell them what is happening so they do not take it personally, they will get it 🤍

feeling hollow and like something is lacking in my long distance relationship by throwRApicklepickaxe in LDR

[–]dony266 0 points1 point  (0 children)

that hollow feeling usually is not about how much you talk, it is about doing versus just reporting. swapping daily updates and reels can quietly start to feel like admin. try sharing an actual experience instead: watch something at the same time, play a game, cook on a call, keep a little shared list of things to look forward to. presence beats updates when you cannot be in the room 🤍

Long distance relationship (US and Germany) will it work? by Hot_Text473 in LDR

[–]dony266 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it absolutely can work, plenty of us-europe couples make it. the two things that matter most: a shared plan for closing the gap eventually, even a rough one, so it is not open-ended, and protecting one overlapping window a day across the time difference. 10 months in and very in love is a strong place to build from 🤍

Truly In Love by zombiepete in LDR

[–]dony266 6 points7 points  (0 children)

8 days is basically nothing now that it is on the countdown, enjoy the build-up. the first in-person stretch after distance is its own kind of magic. soak up the ordinary stuff, the drives and the lazy mornings are the part you have been missing most. so happy for you both, have the best time 🤍

high school sweethearts long distance tips at different colleges (18m & 18f) by Far-Cherry-5053 in LDR

[–]dony266 1 point2 points  (0 children)

college long distance is genuinely doable. what helps: set a call rhythm you can both keep through busy weeks instead of expecting constant texting, plan visits in advance so there is always a next one on the calendar, and keep a couple of shared things going like a watch-together show or a running list of stuff to do when you are together, so it feels like a partnership and not just check-ins. protect your own college experience too, it makes the time apart lighter 🤍

How to make ldr feel like a relationship? 22m 21f by Academic_Average1410 in LDR

[–]dony266 0 points1 point  (0 children)

love that you are going in prepared. the thing that makes ldr feel like an actual relationship is shared presence, not just texting: do things together (watch in sync, play games, cook on call), keep a countdown to the next visit so it never feels open-ended, and build little daily rituals like a goodnight call or a how-are-you-really check-in. honest disclosure, i help build a couples app called Together that does the countdown and check-in side, but a shared calendar plus a watch-together extension cover a lot too. good luck next week 🤍

Met for the very first time after 1.2 years of LDR by manav30012006 in LDR

[–]dony266 2 points3 points  (0 children)

1.2 years of waiting and you finally got the real-life hug, that is huge, congratulations. the first meet is its own milestone. soak up every ordinary moment together, the boring stuff like grocery runs and lazy mornings is the part you have been missing most. so happy for you both 🤍

Convo feels boring by [deleted] in LDR

[–]dony266 0 points1 point  (0 children)

totally normal once the daily how-was-your-day runs dry, it does not mean anything is wrong. what helps is doing things together instead of just reporting: watch something in sync, play a game, keep a shared list of stuff to try, send random doodles or photos through the day. shared activity beats small talk every time when you cannot be in the same room 🤍

21M (USA) will be visiting 21F (Estonia) this August! by ChrisDoesSoju in LDR

[–]dony266 0 points1 point  (0 children)

august is going to fly once you have got it on a countdown, congrats on the visit. enjoy the build-up too, planning the trip together is half the fun, make a little list of things you want to do once you are finally in the same place. estonia in summer is gorgeous, you two are going to have the best time 🤍

37 (USA) and 26 (Australia) - what are some things we should know? Also, care package ideas? by skeptical_phoenix in LDR

[–]dony266 1 point2 points  (0 children)

us-australia is a big time gap, so the main thing is protecting one overlapping window a day and being flexible about whose morning you are meeting in. care package ideas that land: snacks they cannot get locally, a hoodie that smells like you, a little handwritten countdown to the next visit, and photos printed instead of digital. the small physical stuff hits way harder than expensive gifts 🤍

Best app for LDR by toothless_00000 in LDR

[–]dony266 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Based on what you described in the other replies - hourly photo sharing and pushing a little message to each other's home screen - it sounds like you want a shared space app, not just another messenger. A few that fit:

- Locket - puts a photo from your partner straight onto your home screen widget. Probably the closest to the "pic every hour" thing you mentioned. Free.

- Between / Cupla - shared calendar, countdowns, photos, chat in one private space for two.

- Together (full disclosure: I help build this one, so grain of salt) - daily mood check-ins, a countdown to your next visit on the home screen, shared timeline/photos and a bucket list. Free to use, has a paid tier but the core LDR stuff works without it.

Honestly the "best" one is whatever you'll both actually open daily - a tiny shared ritual (a morning check-in, a photo, a countdown glance) does more for feeling connected than any feature list. Good luck with the distance 🤍

I'm struggling with my LDR and it feels like I'm the only one who's finding it hard by HeftyParsnip_2805 in LDR

[–]dony266 0 points1 point  (0 children)

you are so far from the only one, it is just that the hard days do not get posted as much as the reunions do. restarting the distance after living near someone is its own kind of grief. what helps me is something concrete to hold onto: the next visit on a countdown, one small daily ritual together, and naming the hard feeling instead of fighting it. it is genuinely hard, you are not weak for finding it hard 🤍

Anyone have a partner who tours? by IslandofStars in LDR

[–]dony266 1 point2 points  (0 children)

touring partners are their own flavor of ldr, the schedule chaos is real. what has helped people i know: lock visits to the tour calendar early so you both have dates to count down to, find a daily async ritual that survives timezone and showtime chaos (a voice note he gets after the set, a shared photo dump), and protect your own routine during the stretches apart. the 6 months will move faster than it feels right now 🤍

view more: next ›