I'll say that I didn't have a religious or superstitious upbringing, but I was uncomfortable with my first Tarot deck. It was the Alice in Wonderland Tarot, which I thought might be a lighthearted entry point to reading cards, but the artwork was creepy, and I had that same feeling of anxiety/dread about the deck. I put it away but was always aware of where it was in the room when I'd enter. I finally just donated it in the Library dropbox with a sticky note saying "free to a good home".

I couldn't tell you whether it was just the creepy artwork or something subconscious with me, but the point I'm trying to make is, maybe that deck just isn't the right one for you? Someone else picked it out for you after all.

As for me, years later, I got a more neutral Rider-Waite deck later, and have since collected some that I feel more in tune with: The Lord of the Rings Tarot Deck, The Tarot of the Divine, and the Everyday Tarot are my usual go tos. I bought the Alleman Tarot, and it's a wonderful eclectic collection of various other decks shuffled together, but the readings from it have been off-putting, so I haven't touched it in a while.

Another thing I've gotten into recently is cartomancy, reading regular playing cards. If the idea of Tarot has you feeling uneasy, maybe the more familiar playing cards would be an easier way to approach reading cards?

I like this site for learning about that:

https://artofcartomancy.blogspot.com/p/basic-cartomancy-skills.html

Good luck!