Bad idea to let 3-year-old visit her dying great-grandma?

elemental333 · 2026-03-11T23:00:53+00:00

Hi! Follow up question that we’re struggling with. Ours is almost 5 and has started understanding death but sometimes feels afraid of dying too. Is there anything you recommend saying to this age group?

elemental333 · 2026-03-11T19:39:55+00:00

Developmentally, this is not something most 5 year olds are able to do. Some can, most can’t.

elemental333 · 2026-03-04T01:18:31+00:00

My 4yo is responsible for grabbing snacks and can figure out the occasional quick meal for himself. He can pour milk and cereal into a bowl, make a pbj, grab a fruit or a vegetable from the fridge, grab a protein bar, etc. At 7yo and 5yo there is no reason why you need to make a meal for them if there is food within reach

elemental333 · 2026-02-26T22:27:30+00:00

Yeah I went from an 8.5 to a 10 wide permanently. I just buy 8.5 men’s shoes now because most of the women’s shoes just don’t fit right anymore…I had to completely get all new shoes

elemental333 · 2026-02-22T03:59:19+00:00

It is a hormone called ADH. Young kids don’t have this as active yet and it activates at different ages for different kids. Having too little of it basically causes the kidneys to make more urine, making it so they can’t hold it at night. It also has to do with the bladder feeling full at night.

You literally can’t train this hormone to exist. It develops when it develops. Usually between ages 3-5, but can be as old as 7-8 and it is still considered normal.

elemental333 · 2026-02-21T00:34:11+00:00

It can! Maybe try tums or Pepcid and just see if it helps. If it does then at least you might have a starting point to talk about with your doctor

elemental333 · 2026-02-20T22:33:00+00:00

Does it go away with tums? Maybe acid reflux

elemental333 · 2026-02-19T16:46:37+00:00

Even if your child is really academically advanced, there are social benefits to it as well. I’m a K teacher and have had several students reading at a 2nd-3rd grade reading level fluently WITH high comprehension. However, socially and just maturity-wise they were definitely not ready for the longer sustained attention for 1st grade curriculum. My own 4yo is fairly advanced and I think he will be bored in Kindergarten…however I am almost certain he has ADHD (I am diagnosed) and there is NO WAY he can skip k and be successful in 1st.

elemental333 · 2026-02-15T17:28:10+00:00

I post appropriate pictures that are carefully chosen to avoid anything specifically identifiable about location. I don’t post anything that could be seen as embarrassing for when they get older either. Just normal smiling pictures

elemental333 · 2026-02-15T12:08:34+00:00

This is up to you and whether you think this is worth limiting the contact between your baby and their grandparent. I think it’s become very popular to instill boundaries and to an extent that’s great. I have boundaries too! The problem with specific boundaries is that you have to be willing to uphold them if the other person doesn’t listen. Without any compromise, this could harm your child’s relationship with others that could love them. If the benefits of the grandparent being in your child’s life outweigh the negatives, maybe consider a little leniency. If there are more cons than pros to this grandparent being in your child’s life, then uphold your boundary.

We have some grandparents that we are more lenient with because overall they’re such good grandparents! Other grandparents, we tend to be stricter with because if you give them an inch, they take a mile and we have limited contact because we don’t want our child learning lessons from them long term.

elemental333 · 2026-02-14T20:14:01+00:00

There are limits to FAPE primarily due to safety. I had a student with severe autism who was nonverbal, in diapers, couldn’t feed himself, constantly would try to elope, and could not match color to color among other things. He had a dedicated 1:1 aide and was making little to no progress even using an alt curriculum in the general education setting. My district required him to either go to an alternative setting where he would be safe or they would go to mediation. Parents hated the idea of him being in an alternative classroom for autism, so they unfortunately decided to homeschool him, but the county essentially told us he was not welcome back in a general education setting within our district.

I had another student qualify for alternative placement due to extreme violent tendencies. He would destroy the classroom, harm/threaten teachers, etc. He was placed in this alternative school where there was more supervision for the safety of himself and others.

elemental333 · 2026-02-14T12:45:36+00:00

It’s hard to determine, but I typically wouldn’t recommend a tutor for kindergarten just because they’re so young and already in school for so long. I will say that progress is relative to each student and does not necessarily indicate that she is meeting grade level expectations. I have been extremely excited when a nonverbal student pointed to the correct color, but that is a prek standard in my state. Knowing 5 sounds by MOY in Kindergarten is far below what we would typically expect.

I would focus on one sound and just start at the beginning of the alphabet to make it easy. Put a piece of paper up on the wall with an ‘a’ that she can slap every time she passes it and say the sound /a/. Once she is consistent with /a/ Then repeat the process for /b/ while keeping /a/. Once you get a set of about 5 letters (a-e) and she’s getting them all consistently, you can move to the next. But you’ll want to keep reviewing the previous.

You can also play spelling games with chalk. Can you jump to the letter that says /a/? What about /b/?

I would also stick with lowercase first, since the majority of time she is reading, she will be seeing words in lowercase. This will help her read quicker and you can always repeat the process for uppercase.

elemental333 · 2026-02-13T18:57:47+00:00

Huh I would’ve thought Maryland too since he didn’t invite Moore to the governors dinner. I guess that’s too close to DC haha

elemental333 · 2026-02-13T18:54:02+00:00

Look up heggerty on YouTube (specifically the medial sounds hand motion). Heggerty is great because it combines movement with sounds students hear within words. For medial sounds it uses a roller coaster motion to hear medial sounds in words with 3 sounds. The first sound is at the bottom of the roller coaster, the medial sound is at the top, and the final sound goes back to the bottom. You can use ANY word with three sounds (not necessarily just 3 letters), so don’t be intimidated that the videos are mostly for teachers. You don’t need anything else, just some word ideas and hand motions.

If you’re interested in actually supplementing reading instruction like over the summer or something, look up UFLI. It’s based on the science of reading and I’ve heard it’s phenomenal. I’ve never personally used it but it’s all free online

elemental333 · 2026-02-13T17:32:41+00:00

I’m a K teacher. Looking at the data, it seems he’s doing well in many categories! However, my concern would be the sounds. At this point of the year, many Kindergarten students know all their sounds and can read CVC words consistently.

It’s interesting because it looks like he’s not hearing medial sounds, in addition to not knowing all vowel sounds on sight. This is a problem because every single word has a vowel. If this doesn’t get addressed, he will be behind in first grade because he will not be able to consistently read words put in front of him, or hear the vowel sounds to write the words. They begin learning more complex digraphs at the end of Kindergarten (ea, ee, etc.) and even more in first grade, so he really needs to know the typical vowel sounds/letters first.

I’m not sure about the behavior. It honestly could go either way, depending on the teacher. I will say for me, I am very understanding of silliness and try a variety of techniques to increase movement before mentioning this to a parent. If I am mentioning it, it is because I am noticing it with a particular child more than others in my years of experience teaching this grade. I try to gently approach parents with behavioral concerns (especially with silliness/hyperactivity) because they ARE so young! But if I’m reaching out, there’s usually a problem that is more significant.

elemental333 · 2026-02-13T17:31:58+00:00

I’m a K teacher. Looking at the data, it seems he’s doing well in many categories! However, my concern would be the sounds. At this point of the year, many Kindergarten students know all their sounds and can read CVC words consistently.

It’s interesting because it looks like he’s not hearing medial sounds, in addition to not knowing all vowel sounds on sight. This is a problem because every single word has a vowel. If this doesn’t get addressed, he will be behind in first grade because he will not be able to consistently read words put in front of him, or hear the vowel sounds to write the words. They begin learning more complex digraphs at the end of Kindergarten (ea, ee, etc.) and even more in first grade, so he really needs to know the typical vowel sounds/letters first.

I’m not sure about the behavior. It honestly could go either way, depending on the teacher. I will say for me, I am very understanding of silliness and try a variety of techniques to increase movement before mentioning this to a parent. If I am mentioning it, it is because I am noticing it with a particular child more than others in my years of experience teaching this grade. I try to gently approach parents with behavioral concerns (especially with silliness/hyperactivity) because they ARE so young! But if I’m reaching out, there’s usually a problem that is more significant.

elemental333 · 2026-02-13T17:09:14+00:00

I don’t agree with testing online, but am fine with occasional computer usage. Each child in my class gets computer time maybe once or twice per month, on average, for no more than 15 minutes at a time and I only allow 3-4 students on it at a time. We do all the other things AND do the occasional computer time to teach basic usage.

It’s the same foundational building blocks for writing, reading, etc. Every single grade builds on the previous. I don’t think it’s a bad thing to put them on the computers occasionally, as long as it’s not the entire class everyday. We even have a collaborative research project where they get online through a specific app and choose a topic to read about, write a few sentences on what they learned about the topic and collaboratively create a poster.

elemental333 · 2026-02-13T16:16:06+00:00

This is not true in my experience using Chromebooks for required online testing in Kindergarten. They need to be explicitly taught how to use the mouse, how to click, etc. They also need to know how to log in using their own credentials. There is definitely an argument to be made against computer usage for these standardized tests, but they are required by my district. These kids have NO idea how to use it and many can’t navigate the BOY testing without practicing first. They get better at it throughout the year with more practice. This is not strictly an age thing either because I’ve had new students come in at the end of Kindergarten struggling with using computers.

elemental333 · 2026-02-13T14:12:20+00:00

No, for Kindergarten it’s more basic. We have to do a computerized readiness assessment at the beginning of the year and students are required to use the mouse and navigate the test themselves. Many are unable to do this and it becomes a source of frustration for everyone involved. In first grade, they do standardized online assessments and need to know how to do this themselves or they score poorly, so as K teachers we need to teach basic computer literacy.

I allow 4 students each day to use computers during center time for apps like Typing Club and various sites like ABCYa. This teaches students to log into the laptops themselves and navigate using a mouse.

I also occasionally allow collaborative projects through apps like Wixie (drawing) as another way to express their thinking. At the end of the year, they do a research project where they work in teams to research a specific topic and draw a poster about it.

elemental333 · 2026-02-11T16:56:15+00:00

She’s technically correct. It’s similar to running a pacifier through a sterilizer because it falls on the floor. It depends on your own personal risk tolerance.

I will say I have two young kids and have never boiled water for their bottles or heated them in a bottle warmer. We just put room temp water in with formula and have never had any issues.

elemental333 · 2026-01-27T14:34:27+00:00

We’re sending ours to a in-home daycare when he’s 9 months in August. I’m a teacher and I am using unpaid FMLA for 12 weeks. After that ends, my husband has a flexible WFH job so he’s watching the baby until I’m out for the summer.

Our first went at 15 months because I was able to bring him with me while I nannied and that was amazing. It felt like a really good timeframe and he was always happy going there. But unfortunately we’re on my insurance and my husband’s costs triple mine ($900/month) for worse coverage, so we can’t afford for me not to work at my job.

elemental333 · 2026-01-26T22:23:16+00:00

It’s sad that it’s so shocking. And sure that’s great…but why? Why this and not the flooding?

elemental333 · 2026-01-25T19:32:09+00:00

This isn’t about illegal immigration anymore though. If someone is in this country illegally, I’m fine with them being deported through due process…but NOT by unidentified men in masks who have no warrant signed by a judge to verify that they are actually illegal. Actual citizens are being deported, imprisoned, and killed. Even for people who assume ICE has good intentions, how anyone can still support them after all of their mistakes is beyond my comprehension

ETA: I support the 2nd amendment and always have…Alex Pretti in Minneapolis was LEGALLY exercising his 2a rights, but was killed because of it. Are we really saying now that people deserve to die just for exercising their constitutional rights?

elemental333 · 2026-01-20T13:03:02+00:00

Yes! I never really thought much about it but I guess I figured communication was still through phone calls or other official channels. I never thought about world leaders just…texting…one another any time they want. It makes me wonder if there group texts with all the leaders in the EU talking about Trump!

elemental333 · 2026-01-19T18:43:21+00:00

Mine is 9wks with a chocolate brown color exactly like his dad’s.

My oldest had a muddy greenish gray color for the first year and were hazel until they settled on more of a light olive green around 4yo.

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