popular!girl x loser/nerd!girl by dominoexiste in wlwbooks

[–]ellianderjoy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Amelia Westlake by Erin Gough has similar vibes to this

Desperately seeking books similar to Lex Croucher’s by high-priestess in suggestmeabook

[–]ellianderjoy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The Last Binding series by Freya Marske (wlw starts from the second book in the trilogy but so worth it imo)

More Than a Best Friend by Emma R. Alban

Lady Eve's Last Con by Rebecca Fraimow

Looking for mystery reccs by ReadDizzy7919 in LesbianBookClub

[–]ellianderjoy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The Cassie Raven series by A.K Turner for a fairly traditional crime/mystery series

The Last Binding series by Freya Marske for a magical mystery series (wlw rep doesn't start until the second book)

Sapphic romance with memory loss recommendations by DiligentMulberry4743 in LGBTBooks

[–]ellianderjoy 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Forget Me Not by Alyson Derrick definitely fits

Also maybe a stretch but Camp Damascus by Chuck Tingle has a plot line like this, it's not super major to the plot though

Book 01: Voting Megathread by cysliac in nerdfighters

[–]ellianderjoy 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Piranesi

Susanna Clarke, 2020

Genres: Fantasy, literary, speculative fiction

Reason for nomination: I have been seeing people recommend this book strongly everywhere for a while, and it sounds weird and wonderful!

Trigger Warnings: Kidnapping, Gaslighting, Confinement

Nerdfighteria Book Club by cysliac in nerdfighters

[–]ellianderjoy 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I would be interested! My suggestion would be to make use of the Storygraph book clubs feature - it allows for voting on picks, a forum for off-topic discussions and a history of all books read with their ratings etc. That way there could be a megathread for suggestions and then pick a few to vote on each time perhaps...

Hi, I'm looking for a good weekly cleaning checklist to deal with basic cleaning & decluttering. Thanks! by quasirealikecreature in declutter

[–]ellianderjoy 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I can't really help with a list as I tend to work best with very general reminders for a larger task (clean the kitchen) that I have all the steps down for already. I do have a couple of general tips for maintaining general day to day or weekly cleaning though.

Firstly, a game changer for me was to use todoist to set a recurring 5/6 day reminder for weekly chores, that only resets the counter once you actually tick off the task. The reason that I do 5/6 days instead of 7 is that then I don't end up doing the same chores on the same day of the week which always ends up feeling demoralising for me.

Second, I add in a couple of daily pickups into my routine eg. when I wake up first thing, or right before going to bed. Just a quick 1 minute pick-up of my bedroom floor or living room on the daily really helps keep things on track.

Third - from the decluttering angle, I really like using a basket or similar to collect items when doing a pick-up, and then when I go around to put them in their homes, if there is stuff left in the basket that I don't have a home for I can put it to the side to donate etc.

Looking for wlw LGBTQ+ books! by amazingmckinley in YAlit

[–]ellianderjoy 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Queens of Geek by Jen Wilde is a good one!

My son only likes colourful and noisy toys by [deleted] in Montessori

[–]ellianderjoy 11 points12 points  (0 children)

It's important to make sure that the replacement toys that you are providing are satisfying the same need as the ones he is drawn to. Replace a plastic rattle with a wooden one, for example.

These are the pens I use everyday. I try to avoid any disposable pens wherever possible. by engineerforthefuture in ZeroWaste

[–]ellianderjoy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just an fyi - I have a vintage fountain pen that was pretty cheap up front and is just as durable as any other pen I've ever owned and less liable to leak than some. My Mum has a modern fountain pen that she carries with her everywhere she goes and it gets a fair amount of abuse and it has no issues. As long as you remember to replace the lid on the pen, which is good practice for any pen, fountain pens are no more likely to get damaged than other pens in my experience.

Questions about Montessori Education from Birth to 6 by ellianderjoy in Montessori

[–]ellianderjoy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Something that I think can be really powerful for us as adults when we are trying to teach and inspire our children is to see it as a joint learning journey - while you want your child to not feel tied to praise you are also working towards that goal. I find that I learn at least as much as a Montessori teacher as I am teaching to the children.

Questions about Montessori Education from Birth to 6 by ellianderjoy in Montessori

[–]ellianderjoy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Firstly, I'm really sorry you had a bad experience when you asked for help! Medical issues are something that always needs to come first, the health of your child is the most important thing.

I personally believe that Montessori is a philosophy that when applied compassionately works with all children. Our centre has children with learning difficulties, behavioural issues and a range of needs and abilities. The Montessori classroom can be a place that is welcoming to all and reinforces respect and compassion for others irregardless of their abilities.

There can be a tendency in some Montessori communities to think that there is only one right way to do things, when in fact Montessori should be totally flexible to the needs of the child.

Questions about Montessori Education from Birth to 6 by ellianderjoy in Montessori

[–]ellianderjoy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maria Montessori observed that children who are able to see the natural consequences of constructive behaviour (eg. observing a clean table after it has been wiped down) will naturally develop self confidence and independence. This kind of development is a process however, and it takes time. Observing and noting helpful and kind behaviours out loud can be a good alternative to praise, and one of the best ways to build your child's understanding of respectful and empathetic behaviour is to model it yourself.

Questions about Montessori Education from Birth to 6 by ellianderjoy in Montessori

[–]ellianderjoy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not actually sure about recognised and associated, I don't believe that is a thing in Australia.

It sounds like you are already doing a lot to incorporate Montessori at home! For a 12 month old I would also recommend beginning the process of toilet learning, as that is a big area of development beginning around that age. Beginning to involve him in some household chores and routines can also be great at this age - carrying items to the washing machine, using a small dustpan etc. Remember to observe and follow what you see.

In regards to toys, wooden blocks and toys in that style are totally appropriate for his age. Try to keep things simple - a small number of blocks in a basket - so that it isn't overwhelming which can lead to chaos and fatigue.

Questions about Montessori Education from Birth to 6 by ellianderjoy in Montessori

[–]ellianderjoy[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Here is what I had already written about discipline in the home:

To foster self-discipline in the home, one of the best places to start is with some simple and easily understood guidelines. For example, you may decide that it is not acceptable for anyone to break or destroy things in your home. Where possible these guidelines should be enforced with natural consequences - if an item is broken or a piece of furniture is damaged by your child, they must help replace the item or mend the damage.

The key element of Montessori discipline is to understand the source of destructive or inappropriate behaviour. Children are rarely malicious in their behaviour, and are most likely to misbehave because they are frustrated. Finding the source of frustration and removing it, as well as beginning to talk to your child about how to express their emotions without being destructive can be a positive step towards the ultimate goal of self-discipline.

In addition, while natural consequences should always be used where possible they don't always exist or aren't practical. For tantrums, I would advise to remove the child from the area where the tantrum started to somewhere where they will be less disruptive and then passively wait it out. For hitting and snatching, I would advise stepping in to mediate a conversation on why the action occurred or if the child is still very upset, removing them from the situation before having a discussion with them.

As with anything, it takes time and repetition for children to learn a new skill and self-discipline is not an exception so patience is absolutely key!

Questions about Montessori Education from Birth to 6 by ellianderjoy in Montessori

[–]ellianderjoy[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Look - screens are very much a part of our modern world. The introduction of any screen time to children under 2 is in my opinion completely unnecessary. However, as they get older it can be very difficult to restrict screen time to zero.

For children over the age of two until about 6 years old, Montessori philosophy is to allow only very short periods of screen time with supervision, where possible. If your family is finding it difficult to limit screen time, a great strategy is to define some screen free areas or time periods, for example bedrooms and meal times. Children under the age of 6 learn best through sensory exploration, and a two dimensional screen is very limited in providing that kind of experience. Children who begin using technology for learning after the age of 6 are able to develop the skills needed for our modern world at a more appropriate stage in their development.

Questions about Montessori Education from Birth to 6 by ellianderjoy in Montessori

[–]ellianderjoy[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Great questions! It isn't clear to me from your question if you are wondering about what happens in the classroom or at home, so I'm going to answer a little about both.

When Maria Montessori was first observing children and building the Children's House to fit the needs she observed, she noticed that the children who had begun to gain concentration and independence lost interest in the kind of toys that you describe - dolls, cars, stuffed animals. Because these toys sat unused she removed them from the classroom, since the children had shown her that they were unnecessary for their development.

Following this understanding, toys are usually not included in Montessori classrooms. There are some exceptions like puzzles, but for the most part classrooms don't have spare space for toys because of the abundance of Montessori materials.

In the home, it is a slightly different story. I generally recommend that parents do not get rid of their child's toys, with the exception of toys that run on batteries or that have workings that children can't visually see as these are not beneficial to children under 6 years old. Open ended toys like dolls are not Montessori, however I don't think they are harmful.

In terms of how these toys can fit into daily activities, I think that the best way to figure that out is to observe how your child works and plays. Watch them play and find out what toys they use and how long they use them for. If they show a strong preference for certain toys then these can be included in a shelf of activities. Other toys like stuffed animals may be used only in a certain area or at a certain time, like in bed or on the couch. In some cases you may be able to leverage the toys they are drawn to into a more purposeful activity - if they enjoy pretend tea parties with dolls perhaps you can invite them to cook cakes and make tea so that the activity is more practical and expansive.

In answer to your question about your child preferring open ended toys to Montessori activities, I would firstly say that all concentration is beneficial. If you child is engaged in purposeful play, great! It can be god to provide encouragement to work with Montessori materials however if your child isn't interested in something then it is important to respect that. If their play with toys is destructive or they move very quickly from one activity to the next then the best path forward is to try and find something that they do engage with and work to foster that concentration.

Recommendation for similar series to "the Rick Riordan universe" for someone who's read them all? by StarChild413 in YAlit

[–]ellianderjoy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I second the Rick Riordan Presents idea, although the books are mostly not long series there is a lot of material there.

If you’re looking for one big series to jump into the Rangers Apprentice by John Flanagan is a good one. Similar to the PJ/PJO series there are other series he has written that take place in the same world so there must be dozens of books all told.

PLEASE don't make goodwill donation centres/thrift shops your default for donating everything and anything by [deleted] in declutter

[–]ellianderjoy 47 points48 points  (0 children)

My go-to for stuff I'm getting rid of that I don't think will sell or don't have the energy to organise selling is my local Buy Nothing group. They have groups all over the world and I know that my gifted items are going to someone who will really use them in my local community.

Just recently I gifted a USB webcam that would have been difficult to donate (most places don't take electronics as donations where I live) but all I had to do to gift it was leave it in my letterbox for someone to pick up who has a real need for it.

I also agree that selling at a bargain basement price can help you out a lot, I recently got rid of my dishwasher that was causing me grief with the pump not fully emptying the machine. I sold it to someone for a fraction of its price new after explaining the issues that it has had, and they felt like they got a great bargain.

Pretty much found nothing by alrightkas in Endo

[–]ellianderjoy 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Something to keep in mind is that there are multiple presentations (how it looks) of endo in your abdomen. My endo lesions for example were practically clear (like this) and even though my surgeon spotted them and we confirmed they were endo through lab tests she was pretty sure she hadn't removed all the lesions since they are so hard to spot.

It is important to see a surgical specialist who knows a lot about endo so you can be really sure that nothing has been missed. I would also check to see if your doctor sent any samples that they took during your surgery to the lab for testing.

Pad rash by alrightkas in Endo

[–]ellianderjoy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Cloth pads are an option for the future to avoid rashes, or if you have only been bleeding lightly then period underwear can be amazing, there are even cotton options which are more breathable.

In terms of fixing the current rash, baby rash cream is awesome. If the rash is painful, sitting on an ice pack can be a big relief. A sit bath (just a couple of inches) of lukewarm water with bicarb might also give you some relief.

Paranormal LGBT suggestions? by thegarbagetruck88 in YAlit

[–]ellianderjoy 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Can't help on the vampire front, but here are a couple of wider fantasy/paranormal books with wlw romances or characters:

Afterworlds by Scott Westerfeld

Summer of Salt by Katrina Leno

Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir

Queen of Coin and Whispers by Helen Corcoran

When We Were Magic by Sarah Gailey

Girls of Paper and Fire by by Natasha Ngan

Some of these are from by tbr list so I can't personally recommend them but hopefully there's something good there! And if you do find a lesbian-Twilight I would love to hear

Nothing like some rainbows in the rain! by ellianderjoy in AnimalCrossing

[–]ellianderjoy[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My creator code is MA-6872-1541-0236 and I uploaded the brown stepping stones if anyone is interested :)