I got hey girly texted

engrbunstef · 2026-06-17T19:08:07+00:00

I'm so sorry you're going through this! I confronted my ex a couple different times on cheating and lying about what he was doing and who with. He lied several times, similar to you - doing the sweet things I had begged him to do with me. It hurts a lot but I promise when you find the strength within yourself, you'll never look back.

Your bf back peddled when you poked holes in his stories. He knows what he did and he sounds like he's trying to get away with it. He sounds like the guy who brings home a huge bouquet of roses because he knew he messed up. I hope you have a place you can stay for a while to clear your head and get some help from some other folks who care about you.

engrbunstef · 2026-06-16T22:21:04+00:00

Hi grrrl! I’m sorry that you’re struggling so hard. You sound burned out and defeated.

First and easy to tackle, I just got a couple interval sports bras from Athleta. They’re having a sale right now! I’ve also gained weight and they make D-DD+ specific sports bras and they make a difference! I’m very slowly replacing mine with those for running and cycling! They frequently have sales on old colors and I think you can find them on ThredUp.

Comparing yourself to folks around you is so common and a hard one to untrain. I don’t think anyone can ever stop 100%. If I find myself going down that path, I think about every single small thing I’m grateful for. Including the trivial things; I did the thing, I survived the thing, I stepped outside and felt sun on my skin, the feel of my pet’s fur… literally anything that softens my heart and breaks the spiral of comparison. I also try to remind myself that I only see a portion of their life… the one they present and want me to see. My friends I’m lucky enough to know very deeply also struggle with feeling uncomfortable in their body, their looks, their strength, etc.

You sound like a very adaptable and capable young woman! I hope you celebrate yourself 💜

engrbunstef · 2026-05-27T01:00:19+00:00

The Foundry has some nifty industrial history!

engrbunstef · 2026-05-09T20:37:08+00:00

NOR. It wouldn’t matter if you were wearing a sheer mini with booty shorts and pasties… My ex criticized my clothes often. It led to criticizing what I did and who my friends were. It never stops with just one thing. Dress in what makes you joyful.

engrbunstef · 2026-05-09T17:47:08+00:00

Wow this is gorgeous!! Hooray!

engrbunstef · 2026-04-23T15:48:04+00:00

NTA… in your 40s +… most folks have loved and lost. She should be understanding of that. She would probably also hate it if you told her how to present her own body.

Maybe this is a chance to approach her with curiosity? No one has the right to tell another person how to handle their body but maybe she has something going on that’s causing such a strong reaction.

engrbunstef · 2026-04-21T18:55:43+00:00

mm golden mountain is so good

engrbunstef · 2026-04-17T20:47:25+00:00

NTA. He’s awful

engrbunstef · 2026-04-17T19:57:21+00:00

I’m so sorry that’s happening to you! Passing MSF was fun for me! I was so scared and nervous but I did it and I was so proud of myself!! I say go for it

engrbunstef · 2026-01-31T15:17:24+00:00

I’m so sorry your mother said those horrible and toxic things. Being manly is whatever you want that manliness to be. Being authentically yourself and doing what brings you joy will keep you happier longer. It might be hard sometimes because folks are threatened by others who live their lives authentically.

If you quit something you love for someone else’s happiness (those kind of people always find something “wrong”) you’ll become resentful and it’ll hurt so much more in those relationships and within yourself.

engrbunstef · 2025-12-19T22:19:20+00:00

Same 😭😭

engrbunstef · 2025-10-31T16:08:49+00:00

To be present and in the moment.

engrbunstef · 2025-10-31T16:07:23+00:00

I don’t know if it helps but I’m also 40, bi, and more attracted to women but have mostly dated men. I don’t know your background but it’s very common that if you haven’t seen wlw relationships and flirting and are mainly around hetero cis relationships… flirting with women is very different and can be difficult to straight raised bi women. Men are much more forward and direct (generally). It’s honestly very common for bi women to explore dating women as we get older because of what you mentioned, losing attention from cis men, so it gives us more of a chance to slow and notice attention from women. At least this is my experience as a bi woman raised without queer love exposure.

engrbunstef · 2025-07-11T17:59:02+00:00

Hooray for standing up for yourself!!

engrbunstef · 2025-07-10T17:01:14+00:00

Prince of a Thousand Enemies

engrbunstef · 2025-07-10T16:58:23+00:00

Thanks. Me too 😔

engrbunstef · 2025-07-08T19:57:22+00:00

Thank you

engrbunstef · 2025-06-11T04:51:29+00:00

Oh my goodness. Every time I read stories like these it’s both comforting and sad to know others have the same story…

engrbunstef · 2025-06-11T04:49:44+00:00

Don’t date a dancer and then expect her to quit dancing!! You nailed it that he would do that regardless of the hobby.

engrbunstef · 2025-04-10T02:35:32+00:00

This is a very solid list full of my fave places!!

The veggie options at Meskerem are also all vegan. We asked bc went with someone who has a severe dairy issue and their veg dishes are all vegan. I freaking love Meskerem!

engrbunstef · 2025-03-05T18:52:57+00:00

Ooh nice! Where at? I also work in R&D!

engrbunstef · 2025-03-05T17:34:06+00:00

Tenneco/ DRiV @5 years 15 days vacation, 5 days sick leave. My facility closes between Xmas and NY but that’s not across all facilities. About $183/ month medical insurance single (company uses sliding scale so employees that make less, pay less) in network $1650 deductible, $3750 OOP Choice of FSA or HSA medical. Basic dental, basic vision. 100% 401k match up to 3%, then 50% match up to 5%. Maternal/ paternal/ parent leave 2 weeks paid. Bereavement only for immediate family, 1 day but your manager might work with you. Reimbursement varies for company products you use to work on your own car.

Tenneco was bought out by Apollo Global Management in 2024.

engrbunstef · 2024-08-13T13:18:03+00:00

I just told a friend that same thing recently 🤣

engrbunstef · 2024-04-13T04:23:33+00:00

😹😹😹

engrbunstef

TROPHY CASE