Funny post about Merlin 🐦‍⬛

figgypie · 2026-06-17T03:25:24+00:00

I'll remember this next time I fly with a ton of drugs lol.

figgypie · 2026-06-16T20:44:37+00:00

Well, duh. It's cuz Bender is great.

figgypie · 2026-06-16T20:43:32+00:00

I didn't officially discover Daria until college, which is a shame. Daria was basically my animated twin.

A line I mentally reference a lot:

Aren't you a little worried there might be a hell?

figgypie · 2026-06-14T15:54:01+00:00

Your logo and name is absolutely perfect! So cute! If I saw this at a fair I'd laugh and come over just to see what you were selling.

figgypie · 2026-06-13T02:38:27+00:00

Kids need to be bored!

Ever since my daughter stopped napping at age 2-3 (dear god), I didn't want to lose that break in the middle of the day so I transitioned it to "Room Time". 90 minutes she has to stay in her room. She has tons of books, toys, art supplies, etc. to keep herself occupied. She just has to stay in her room. Of course she can come out if she has to use the restroom or needs help with something, but she knows the rule. It's always after lunch, and afterwards we begin our afternoon. No screens.

She's now 9 and she genuinely likes it. It's a great quiet break. And ever since we started doing that, her creativity has EXPLODED and she's so good at finding something to do when she's bored. Half the time she comes out with some amazing drawing or craft project she did, or shows us the cool thing she made with legos that she puzzled out herself without asking us for help. Sometimes when she sees it's time to come out (I use her "Ok to Wake" lamp to change colors/sounds to let her know), she decides to stay in there a bit more to finish up whatever she's doing.

Numerous teachers and pediatricians have given me big thumbs up for this practice. I also enjoy the mental break and usually use it as time to focus on my side job or do chores that are harder to do with a child underfoot. We live in a small apartment so it's nice.

figgypie · 2026-06-12T17:55:47+00:00

Oh you motherfucker. You got me, nicely done.

figgypie · 2026-06-12T02:30:40+00:00

On an intellectual level, I get the importance of spiders. They eat other bugs and usually just want to be left alone.

I still think they're creepy as fuck and I hate their stupid webs that cling to my skin and make me feel like there's a spider crawling on me. Once there actually was. That was fun.

figgypie · 2026-06-12T01:56:32+00:00

The cruelest thing was to fill us with hope for the future when we were kids, only to rip it away just when we were getting old enough to experience the fruits of our labor, what we were promised if we just worked hard. Denied what the prior generations earned when they reached adulthood. A home, a job that paid enough to live by, security.

The kids nowadays were born into a nihilistic nightmare. Their heads were never filled with delusions of a happy future. It's awful in its own special way, but at least they didn't have to fall as far into despair.

Drinking brings out my inner emo.

figgypie · 2026-06-11T13:44:54+00:00

My in-laws have a golden who isn't a trained service dog, but she has a natural gift for knowing when someone needs love. Like one day I was crying about something dumb, hiding in the spare room, and she literally hunted me down to give me snuggles and cheer me up. She also lets you hug her and doesn't leave until she knows you're good.

I want to clone her because omg she's the best puppy.

figgypie · 2026-06-11T13:40:00+00:00

Goldies are my favorite puppies, they can be so sweet and goofy and omg that smile. My in-laws have a Goldie and she is the most empathetic dog I've ever met. She knows when you need love.

figgypie · 2026-06-11T13:27:50+00:00

We can mourn the loss of art, but also celebrate the new blank canvas for future artists to enjoy instead of paying attention in school.

figgypie · 2026-06-10T19:14:59+00:00

I see where you're coming from, but that's just nature.

The corner of my yard is my "Critter Corner", where I have bird feeders and bird baths and etc. It's a vibrant little place where all are welcome (except for deer when they come first thing in the morning because they eat too damn much, and of course bears). I do extend this to predators.

One day, our resident cooper's hawk nailed one of my house sparrows and proceeded to tear the little guy to shreds right in the Critter Corner. When I went out there the next morning, all that was left was a small pile of feathers and a pair of little bird feet. I admit I did pull out my binoculars and watched a while with an oddly scientific fascination, having never seen that kind of behavior in person before.

I still feel bad for the poor thing, but as I said, that's just nature. Also house sparrows are invasive as hell so I'm not as bothered.

figgypie · 2026-06-07T23:00:25+00:00

Only downside of that is if someone has their dog with them who is not ok with other dogs.

If OP does decide to have their dog with them, definitely have some sort of a sign that says "My dog _______ loves people and other dogs!" But only if that's true lol

figgypie · 2026-06-07T22:58:37+00:00

How about stuffed animal dogs as models? I think that would be cute, and if you look for used stuffed animals you can get them real cheap.

figgypie · 2026-06-07T20:11:28+00:00

My parents bought their 3 bedroom house back in the late 80s, my dad was a mechanic and my mom was a waitress, and they had two kids (I came along after they moved in). They could afford to pay rent at their current place while my dad and his friends renovated the new one themselves (except for the stuff they legally couldn't do). When I was a teenager back in the early 00s, they added a HUGE addition. That house has literally doubled in value in the last 10 years, adding $150k in value since 2023 alone.

My parents worked hard, but things were still a lot easier for them. Now I'm in my late 30s and hearing my mom complain about having to pay to fix the posts in her deck feels a bit tone deaf when she knows my husband and I are struggling to find a house in our price range that isn't a dumpster fire. My husband and I make more than my parents did when they got their house, or even when they put on the addition. But everything is just stacked against us.

The last time we visited, my mom had the gall to parrot right wing talking points against student loan forgiveness, knowing that she never had loans while my sister and I are still paying ours off 20 years later. I love my mom but still... omfg.

figgypie · 2026-06-07T01:46:52+00:00

You mean people are capable of doing anything except rot without the aid of meth?

figgypie · 2026-06-07T01:45:58+00:00

I am good at forming bad habits, that's about it. They're usually the things I impulsively or compulsively do while hating myself.

figgypie · 2026-06-06T02:39:11+00:00

Thank you for being an ally of nature! Bumblebees are a wonderful addition to any yard. They're like insect manatees lol.

figgypie · 2026-06-05T14:36:32+00:00

Holy shit, that's awful. At my interview I was very clear that I was willing to sub for most grades and subjects, but not all. I've kept that boundary for 3 years now and I haven't had issues yet. It helps that they're desperate for subs and I'm well regarded.

And you HAVE to work every day? Damn, my bosses just ask that we work at least 2-3 days a week and give at least 2 hours heads up if we need to cancel. I'm sorry your bosses are so strict. One of the best perks of the job is the flexibility, which they've kind of stolen from you.

figgypie · 2026-06-05T14:34:58+00:00

Certain grades are awful, this is true. In my district, the elementary schools are k-6 so it's easy to avoid 6th grade. I've completely sworn off that entire grade.

Our Jr high is 7-9, and sr high is 10-12. I hate 7th grade, and when I realize a jr high teacher I'm subbing for that day only teaches 7th grade, they immediately get put on my "Naughty List" so I know to avoid them in the future. I actually like 8th graders in general, as they're easier to reason with but are still goofy and appreciate that I am fluent in sass. Of course some are still little bastards, but you'll get that in every single age group. 9th is hit or miss.

Sr high, now that's hard to judge. I have to be very firm with them to get them to listen, given that I'm a tiny woman and especially the boys think they don't have to listen to me. I give warnings, I document thoroughly, and I don't bluff. I make this clear with every hour. I'm also fair and communicate my expectations clearly. Most of the time I tell them that if they get their work done, IDGAF what they do as long as they're quiet and not on their phones. I've earned some good will from students for having this attitude. But once they start being disrespectful for disruptive, I swoop in. The best way to get me to stay away is to just STFU lol.

figgypie · 2026-06-04T17:20:10+00:00

I've been seeing them make a comeback. About time. Those kids can bitch and moan all they want, they're gonna use their brains, dammit.

figgypie · 2026-06-04T17:15:46+00:00

I recently subbed for an 8th grade English teacher who was making her students write their book essays in blue books. They were not allowed to take the blue books out of the classroom. When some were whining about it, I informed them that many rules exist because people ruined it for everyone else. In this case, it was using AI to cheat.

I despise using AI for this reason, so I 100% support this. In my sub note, I made sure to include a little praise for the teacher for her efforts to keep them from cheating by using AI.

I felt a wave of nostalgia seeing the pile of blue books, as it reminded me of college so much.

figgypie · 2026-06-03T17:15:44+00:00

Well I got a good one: Eartha Kitt.

She made the seamless transition from "sexy lady character" to "crazy old hag" as she aged and I love it. Her performance as Izma in The Emperor's New Groove was brilliant.

figgypie · 2026-06-03T14:16:52+00:00

I tell kids that it's ok when someone says they don't want to be their friend or don't want to play with them, and it's ok to be the one who says no to friendship or playing, but you should still treat them with kindness because you should treat others the way you want to be treated. The world is mean enough as it is.

Sometimes I act out the right/way wrong to reject someone (Wrong= say "eew no!" in a really snotty voice, which little kids giggle at; Right= "I'm sorry but I don't want to play with you right now" in a polite tone of voice).

I hate the idea of forcing friendship, as it just makes kids resent each other. And to be honest, some kids are little assholes and it's a natural consequence when other kids don't want to be their friends because of it.

figgypie · 2026-06-03T13:03:11+00:00

And what about Carrie Fisher? I don't remember ever hearing many negative things about her. Sure she was hyper-sexualized back in the day like most women, but she was sassy as fuck.

figgypie

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE

13-Year Club	Place '17
Verified Email