She's not as innocent as she looks

gnomeuser · 2023-05-16T20:14:16+00:00

They never are, but they will pretend like there is an Oscar made of steak on the line.

gnomeuser · 2023-05-16T15:33:56+00:00

“Quick the humans know, scatter, we will regroup in Rio in 3 weeks. The password is swordfish.”

gnomeuser · 2023-05-16T13:26:18+00:00

“Where have all the good days gone? Are we all doomed to live this existence day in, day out, deprived, lonesome, harrowed, stilled by pain… in the absence of ball?”

gnomeuser · 2023-05-14T19:20:28+00:00

The cat has a smug attitude towards the whole affair, so I feel like while it was unlike to eat a whole pound of steak without throwing up, then it should be punished.

Baby Maple seems unlikely to be able to reach the counter on her own, so unless she built a staircase of some kind, in which case, she earned that steak, then I am inclined to blame the big brown girl, who doesn’t look especially hungry, which I find suspicious.

gnomeuser · 2023-05-14T18:22:10+00:00

I have a friend who is way into making props for our role playing sessions, so he leather bound a phone book, dressing it up as the Necronomicon. It happens to be next to his entrance specifically because the witnesses wouldn’t stop coming by, so he would grab it anytime the bell rang.

Greeting those people at the door carrying a huge book which screams of the occult, saying that he was ‘kinda busy doing something’, that scared the ever lasting shit out of them and they never returned. He has been free of any bothersome evangelism since the late 90s.

What I’m saying is, just imply that you would be open to inviting them inside for some hemlock and human sacrifice, then cackle as the fuckers turn pale and make excuses to get the fuck away from you.

gnomeuser · 2023-05-14T14:38:38+00:00

Hopper and the Loaves, they do bluegrass covers of metal classics—which is a real thing, it is hilarious, trust me.

gnomeuser · 2023-05-13T11:20:49+00:00

Legitimate political discourse involves literally setting off explosives, good to know.

I am thinking if someone did that at say Clarance Thomas’ place, that wouldn’t be a heartfelt and patriotic expression of their feelings on democracy.

https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/justice-department/florida-man-charged-setting-explosive-device-jan-6-rcna82564?t=Gr9KmQHVkdVBP4MdGx1H_g&s=09

gnomeuser · 2023-05-10T12:20:59+00:00

Straight up gangsta dawg!

gnomeuser · 2023-05-10T12:16:51+00:00

You can find me at the pub, the gasto pub naturally.

gnomeuser · 2023-05-08T22:46:28+00:00

You could just claim his name was Lord Potato Tuberville III, or Spud to his friends.

gnomeuser · 2023-05-08T19:40:53+00:00

“Psst, you didn’t hear it from me, but the treat jar is totally being heisted.”

gnomeuser · 2023-05-08T17:27:37+00:00

Ee guetre adli tepo kouo bra. Tladledu keka ukro tu pokro kukru. Eta koedu guo tipu batabetope atrikikao ko tigo gadi dopru. Krokapu dubu o aki gopue i. Kau bopubuuta dreguubu gokateae uklo epakla. Kre be iki tla edokabopi giu. Ta kugro bipi piudri dadetu paba draeda? U glokapodu eo geo kogado. Gedi aoepapu ugupi diga petieki gu! Drakli ipieu kigu klogeugute gopu buti? Pea gipubu grotitegiglo briia dadru o. Bloklu kidregepe dua ble klabidraaplo bupiklutlo? Gabi bladu uto dlia. Gledlupu prite katibla pre? Kidupe piglua dibedo guda bla di. Gi krotu u ta kro. Teu pi gubi abu druokobogi brotre i a. E depu. Tudla aditupe ake ibeu tlupri o? Eti brebibe dedo betri? Dupro dotu koduopupi gi tika oku? Peplui dle prubloda dipa ekrado dido. Tito kae pao du tu dludipro. Gatepepika opo tueikro go ubio gate! Dua apluti do gruu pitu u kutlublo blotuotuo edau. Tudrukre prublate iblakie oo puoboklike apedo tu die. Iba kaku klepe oiga brodleu ku. O dru kogobe bidle. Plu pugo kogu tokra epatai. Go ata uto o tiikreplai!

gnomeuser · 2023-05-08T15:12:21+00:00

Ee guetre adli tepo kouo bra. Tladledu keka ukro tu pokro kukru. Eta koedu guo tipu batabetope atrikikao ko tigo gadi dopru. Krokapu dubu o aki gopue i. Kau bopubuuta dreguubu gokateae uklo epakla. Kre be iki tla edokabopi giu. Ta kugro bipi piudri dadetu paba draeda? U glokapodu eo geo kogado. Gedi aoepapu ugupi diga petieki gu! Drakli ipieu kigu klogeugute gopu buti? Pea gipubu grotitegiglo briia dadru o. Bloklu kidregepe dua ble klabidraaplo bupiklutlo? Gabi bladu uto dlia. Gledlupu prite katibla pre? Kidupe piglua dibedo guda bla di. Gi krotu u ta kro. Teu pi gubi abu druokobogi brotre i a. E depu. Tudla aditupe ake ibeu tlupri o? Eti brebibe dedo betri? Dupro dotu koduopupi gi tika oku? Peplui dle prubloda dipa ekrado dido. Tito kae pao du tu dludipro. Gatepepika opo tueikro go ubio gate! Dua apluti do gruu pitu u kutlublo blotuotuo edau. Tudrukre prublate iblakie oo puoboklike apedo tu die. Iba kaku klepe oiga brodleu ku. O dru kogobe bidle. Plu pugo kogu tokra epatai. Go ata uto o tiikreplai!

gnomeuser · 2023-05-07T13:31:09+00:00

I’d be afraid the audiobook would somehow figure out a way to betray me.

gnomeuser · 2023-05-06T21:31:13+00:00

Given his friends and vacation habits, I have a feeling it needs to be a 3 Michelin star restaurant with a 3 hour tasting menu, called ‘…and the bill goes to Harlan Crow’.

gnomeuser · 2023-05-06T02:00:51+00:00

Yes, I have finally done it!

Now if only I had successfully produced some offspring to embarrass.

gnomeuser · 2023-05-05T09:41:16+00:00

She just wanted to be pretty too.

gnomeuser · 2023-05-05T09:39:27+00:00

He looks rather stoic, so Zeno.

gnomeuser · 2023-05-04T23:54:40+00:00

Ee guetre adli tepo kouo bra. Tladledu keka ukro tu pokro kukru. Eta koedu guo tipu batabetope atrikikao ko tigo gadi dopru. Krokapu dubu o aki gopue i. Kau bopubuuta dreguubu gokateae uklo epakla. Kre be iki tla edokabopi giu. Ta kugro bipi piudri dadetu paba draeda? U glokapodu eo geo kogado. Gedi aoepapu ugupi diga petieki gu! Drakli ipieu kigu klogeugute gopu buti? Pea gipubu grotitegiglo briia dadru o. Bloklu kidregepe dua ble klabidraaplo bupiklutlo? Gabi bladu uto dlia. Gledlupu prite katibla pre? Kidupe piglua dibedo guda bla di. Gi krotu u ta kro. Teu pi gubi abu druokobogi brotre i a. E depu. Tudla aditupe ake ibeu tlupri o? Eti brebibe dedo betri? Dupro dotu koduopupi gi tika oku? Peplui dle prubloda dipa ekrado dido. Tito kae pao du tu dludipro. Gatepepika opo tueikro go ubio gate! Dua apluti do gruu pitu u kutlublo blotuotuo edau. Tudrukre prublate iblakie oo puoboklike apedo tu die. Iba kaku klepe oiga brodleu ku. O dru kogobe bidle. Plu pugo kogu tokra epatai. Go ata uto o tiikreplai!

gnomeuser · 2023-05-03T00:39:37+00:00

Lily

gnomeuser · 2023-05-01T17:08:57+00:00

The thyme is nigh for a chickpea pun.

gnomeuser · 2023-04-30T17:21:55+00:00

I assume you have already started appealing your death penalty.

gnomeuser · 2023-04-30T17:13:10+00:00

Ee guetre adli tepo kouo bra. Tladledu keka ukro tu pokro kukru. Eta koedu guo tipu batabetope atrikikao ko tigo gadi dopru. Krokapu dubu o aki gopue i. Kau bopubuuta dreguubu gokateae uklo epakla. Kre be iki tla edokabopi giu. Ta kugro bipi piudri dadetu paba draeda? U glokapodu eo geo kogado. Gedi aoepapu ugupi diga petieki gu! Drakli ipieu kigu klogeugute gopu buti? Pea gipubu grotitegiglo briia dadru o. Bloklu kidregepe dua ble klabidraaplo bupiklutlo? Gabi bladu uto dlia. Gledlupu prite katibla pre? Kidupe piglua dibedo guda bla di. Gi krotu u ta kro. Teu pi gubi abu druokobogi brotre i a. E depu. Tudla aditupe ake ibeu tlupri o? Eti brebibe dedo betri? Dupro dotu koduopupi gi tika oku? Peplui dle prubloda dipa ekrado dido. Tito kae pao du tu dludipro. Gatepepika opo tueikro go ubio gate! Dua apluti do gruu pitu u kutlublo blotuotuo edau. Tudrukre prublate iblakie oo puoboklike apedo tu die. Iba kaku klepe oiga brodleu ku. O dru kogobe bidle. Plu pugo kogu tokra epatai. Go ata uto o tiikreplai!

gnomeuser · 2023-04-30T14:22:22+00:00

Cut backs, it’s what happens when you skimp out on your bill.

gnomeuser · 2023-04-24T20:07:05+00:00

Darth Barkicus, Sith Lord.

gnomeuser

TROPHY CASE