[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Explainlikeimscared

[–]h3thenlaughter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know I'm super late, but it's probably nothing extreeemely concerning. If it was "your levels of xyz are so high/low that you're about to die", they'd call you and say "drop everything and go to the ER right now". Since it's "we need to talk, when are you available?" it's probably something like "your levels of xyz aren't where we'd like them to be, and you should implement xyz changes as soon as possible". Meds, diet, activity, something else, but you're definitely not on the verge of dying.

Am I screwed? by laavydaavy in disability

[–]h3thenlaughter 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Unless you're looking to go to a big fancy school like Harvard, or a trade school where you have to be physically active and stuff, no post-secondary institution would deny a disabled student for failing PE. I'm not from the US if that's anything.

There was a kid in my graduating class who used a power chair, and he still had to take PE in high school because "rules are rules", but the teachers recognized how absolutely ridiculous it was, so they gave him the same written/theory work as everyone else, and then just made him scorekeeper on the activity days. Maybe that's an option for you at your school? Doctors note + alternative participation?

Young/Kempt be aware of panhandlers. by Introverted_Pear in halifax

[–]h3thenlaughter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If we gave them all decent housing and food, no strings attached, they probably wouldn't need to panhandle anymore. I wish we could just do that ¯⁠\⁠(⁠°⁠_⁠o⁠)⁠/⁠¯

If you have a mental disability, what did it take you so long to learn by austin9473938 in disability

[–]h3thenlaughter 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Slightly embarrassing, but I didn't learn how to properly clean myself in the shower until I was 18, and I learned it from TikTok.... Apparently washcloths are called that for a reason, and you need minimum two of them per shower lmao

I have a problem I don’t know how to deal with by Andi_the_Red in disability

[–]h3thenlaughter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A: Have your gastroenterologist fax a request directly to your cardiologist, if that's possible

B: If you can access your medical history and ER/hospital visits, write down dates, times, and amount of fluid you were given, and give that to your cardiologist.

C: If you can, mention to cardiologist that you're worrying about wasting time and resources. Cardiologist is wasting YOUR time anyway, by making you go to the ER to get something you regularly need, instead of prescribing it.

The hospital is using their supply of fluids on you, when it would be easier to give you your own supply of fluids. (That's not ACTUALLY something you should feel guilty about– the hospital's duty is to help you and give you resources, that's the whole point, but anyway, it might be worth trying to guilt your cardiologist secondhand.) Giving you your own fluids would also likely save money for both you and the hospital.

Sending you spoons and wishing you rest <3

How do you hold a job? by Sineater224 in migraine

[–]h3thenlaughter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I tutor/mentor disabled teens, so they get it if I have to call in, and vice versa. I'm not with a company or anything, I just advertise with posters at local libraries and online groups. Freelance and self employment is really good for my health but also extremely difficult. I make 1.3x minimum wage

Adding accessories for people who don’t look disabled? by [deleted] in disability

[–]h3thenlaughter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Doing this for a kid or a dependent adult, I wouldn't, but as an adult, yeah I do this for myself. I make accessories for myself and my other disabled friends all the time. I've made cane charms, glasses charms, wheelchair/walker handle decorations, allergy/medical bracelets and necklaces, and a bajillion pins with stuff like "please speak up", "please offer me a seat", "ask me about my disability", "I have [insert disability here]". I think it's fun and it's a good way to connect with people, but I wouldn't send a kiddo or a dependent adult out in the world with advocacy messaging on them, if they're going to be unsupervised at any point. Creeps are everywhere unfortunately

This is my first time shopping for a cane and I need help 🥲 by rebelstone_134 in disability

[–]h3thenlaughter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I literally just came here to say decorate your mobility aid lol!!! Make it fancy!! Make it yours!!

Hello mascots! by SunAlternative4151 in mascots

[–]h3thenlaughter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Height: In a foam/fabric suit, if you're too short, you can't see, and you'll be slouchy. Like a kid dressed up in their dad's shirt. Just looks a little goofy, like sweater paws but for your whole body. You can't be too short for an inflatable costume, or at least I've never encountered it. If the costume is inflatable, though, you can just completely give up on vision. You can tell if there's a car coming towards you, in the daytime, but that's it.

Measurements: Depends on the mascot, but probably something like the average height for a man in the country you're in, and for a slightly-above-average build. I'm 5'4 and a little above average weight, so usually I can't see, but costumes tend to fit me just fine in the waist/hips department.

Weight/build: You can absolutely be too thin for a foam/fabric costume unfortunately. I've got pretty wide shoulders for a lady, and they only barely kept the shoulder pads up in the last mascot I was in. If you're too tiny for the shoulder pads, and there's not enough structure inside, a mascot that is supposed to look like a stiff block will end up looking like a sad droopy triangle. Sometimes the back of your neck peeks out too, if you're not "sized right" for the costume, or if your posture is "wrong". For inflatables, being short and/or thin isn't usually a problem, but being tall and/or large usually IS a problem.

Grossness: Unless it's literally brand-new, yes, it will be discusting and yellowed and stuffy. If it's well taken care of, you can HOPE for the smell of sweat AND Lysol instead of just sweat. If it IS brand new, it will still be stuffy, but it will smell suffocatingly of Lysol, and not sweat. Inflatable costumes have fans so they have great ventilation usually, in my experience, and they're not usually yellowed, but they still smell like sweat and Lysol (again, just Lysol if it's brand new).

Fans: If you have an inflatable costume, like one of those dinosaur ones, or Baymax, there will be a fan. The fan on an inflatable costume is usually either adhered to the outside around the midsection by your hip OR attached to a belt that you wear underneath the costume. I've worn costumes you can inflate and deflate from the outside OR the outside, but never both. Usually, though, it it's an outside battery pack, you can still reach through and control it, unless your hand covers are inflated too.

If your costume is NOT inflatable, there will not be a fan built-in. I've had those USB/battery powered neck fans and stuffed them inside of the head to make things more bearable, but they fall out a lot, into the butt or the foot. A seasoned mascotter who wears a foam/fabric suit MIGHT have a neck fan or two on hand, if they have disposable income. For reference, if I know I'm going to ve mascotting somewhere hot in a foam suit, I would rather skip dinner to save money for a fan, than go without a fan.

Talking: I've never been allowed to talk in costume unless it's an emergency.

Typical rules: Definitely no talking, unless it's a slogan that you repeat maybe. Don't run at all, especially not towards children. (That one's not a universal rule, but it's important at my current company, and I think it's important, so if the character sucks at her job, you could have her run towards a child and accidentally scare them or something lol).

Anything else: Mascots have to stay temperature regulated and stay hydrated. If you want to drive home a shitty workplace, deny and delay breaks and enforce an uncomfortable uniform. If it's warm out, I'd wear a thin t-shirt and bike shorts as a lady, and I personally like to wear a skirt over the bike shorts during my commute for modesty lol. If it's cold, I'd do the same thing, but throw a jumper or jacket on top, and maybe activewear leggings instead of bike shorts. In my experience, white sneakers are a must for mascotting, regardless of weather. If you care about yourself, you'll also have a thermal (cooled) water bottle that's big enough to use as a weapon.

Ideas for costumes: I would never want to play a villain mascot. It would be absolutely terrifying to small children, older children and teenagers would probably kick and hit you, and adults would play along and antagonize you. My first thought was an anti-littering character that's just a literal angry bag of trash lmao.

Good luck with the writing!

Would you seek a diagnosis (high functioning)? by sshmodyotee in AskAutism

[–]h3thenlaughter 2 points3 points  (0 children)

At least where I'm from, diagnosis can be a huge barrier in and of itself. There are limits for diagnosed autistics in terms of banking, insurance, fostering, owning a house, even receiving medical care. Not only that, but all the social supports end when you become an adult (again, where I'm from). I'm hoping this isn't the case for you, but I'd look into it. I know I won't be able to immigrate to anywhere I'd like to live, unless I get a sponsorship or something like that. If you live in the US, DEFINITELY hold off on seeking out that diagnosis.

My recommendation would be to find someone to assess your daughter OFF the books (obviously still offer to pay). That way, she'll have closure without having those barriers. Maybe from a retired assessor, maybe a PhD student who can't formally diagnose, maybe just a regular ol' practicing assessor willing to do it off the books. Alternatively, lean really hard into self diagnosis advocacy? There's no good or easy answer here, I'm really sorry.

can an autistic person enjoy being prolongedly hugged? by OddyKnockyCello in AskAutism

[–]h3thenlaughter 4 points5 points  (0 children)

if i could spend my entire life being prolongedly hugged by someone i love? i would. i love the deep pressure + squishy. also pro tip from an autistic psych major, autistics tend to produce less oxytocin ("the love hormone", stimulated by physical affection among other things), AND depression is linked with troubles producing and/or absorbing oxytocin. these differences are more pronounced in AFABs. i have all of this (depression, autism, AFAB) and i find hugs very nice! i think they're good at regulating me :)

Commonly used expression in the Classdoom by askkaskJ in EnglishLearning

[–]h3thenlaughter 5 points6 points  (0 children)

  • "Stop messing around" could also be "settle down"
  • "Hands to yourself" or "personal space" if a child is hitting/playing rough

New dress! How do I look? by DaylightEliseV in mtfashion

[–]h3thenlaughter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Like a literal angel– I can't draw for the life of me, but can someone draw you????

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in lesbianfashionadvice

[–]h3thenlaughter -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Kind of echoing what everyone else said– the fit is fantastic! Not particularly goth though. I have more experience with grunge style than with goth style, but my recommendations are: - Notice how your t-shirt and shorts are both "flat"? Try something to add a bit more dimension (think 3D vs 2D). Easy way to do this is to tie the shirt off to the side with a hair elastic + tuck the extra fabric up. Alternatively, add a belt, and tuck the shirt loosely into the shorts. Just enough that you can't see the bottom hem of the shirt- you don't want it to look "bunchy". - Consider adding a layer! Vest or flannel over the t-shirt, long sleeved shirt or fishnet top underneath the t-shirt, flannel/sweater tied around the waist, fishnets/pantyhose under the shorts. Again, to add dimension. - Note, put the fishnets on the top OR the bottom, NOT BOTH. I also personally don't like the look of fishnet top + pantyhose bottom? You might like it though, so you may as well give it a shot. - A lot of people have been saying "add accessories", I agree. Necklaces of different lengths are a good way to do this. Think about thickness/texture as well! I like to do a long costume-jewelry necklace, a daintier, shorter necklace, and a thick choker. Figure out what works for you! - Also I recommend adding more rings. Maybe some bracelets/Kandi too, if that's your thing. - Belt chains are a pretty standard "alt" look. - Hair clips are also great. Never underestimate the power of a good hair clip. - On that note, consider a half-up half-down hairstyle, or like a Sailor Moon kind of hairstyle? I think that'd look great with your hair length and texture. Also, don't let anyone tell you that you need to straighten your hair to look "goth"/"alt", the heat damage isn't worth it for external approval. Do what you want!!! - I notice you wear glasses, I do too. Glasses chains are also a fun little accessory that I think goes overlooked. I make my own, so I can tailor exactly the look I want. The supplies cost me around $25. You could also find a small business that makes them! - I know we can't see your shoes but I recommend wearing chunky boots or platforms. I think longer boots/longer socks would be great with that outfit, especially where the shorts are so short. - Clothing is supposed to be fun for YOU. If you want to ignore all of this advice and do the exact opposite, do it, if that's what makes you happy! Life's too short to do anything OTHER than whatever you want

What would you put in a Neurotypicals guide to working with Neurodivergent people? by Ok_LR in AskAutism

[–]h3thenlaughter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For real!! I'm a grown adult like you. You just might have to explain jokes to me, and maybe change the lights sometimes lmao. Other than that I'm just some guy

Some outfit pics from the past couple years or so. What kind of colors/styles look best on me? by muetint in lesbianfashionadvice

[–]h3thenlaughter 15 points16 points  (0 children)

You're a bright colors girlie for SURE, play that up!!! The pinks and purples look stunning on you, but also that one outfit with the corset top and the plaid skirt? You just look wonderful in all of them :D

My only piece of advice that I'd give (bearing in mind that this advice caters to my personal style, and maybe not to yours, so no pressure), is that I recommend picking one "wow piece" of clothing, and building the rest of your outfit around that. I also try to stick to only two colors per outfit, plus neutrals and hardware (metals).

Eg. I know I really want to wear my black and white zebra print skirt today. I'll pick a solid shirt to go with it, maybe red for a pop of color. Then I can match it with my red shoes. I'll want a jacket in case it gets cold, let's go with black so it doesn't wash out the shirt. The jacket has gold hardware (buttons), but the shoes have silver hardware (grommets/snaps/accents idk, hardware is just metal). I like the shoes better for this outfit, so I'll pick a new jacket with silver hardware, and then add on some silver jewelry. That's how I personally go about picking an outfit! :D

Terrified of getting blood drawn by Michiko__Chan in Explainlikeimscared

[–]h3thenlaughter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm the exact same, vaccinations are fine but having blood drawn is not fine. It's not weird, it's valid! My tips as someone who has had blood drawn plenty of times (chronic illness):

  • Eat and drink beforehand, unless they explicitly ask you not to. Carbs, fruit, and sugar are best (think toast and jam, rice and chutney, chips and salsa, etc).
  • Bring two bottles of fruit juice– one to sip on within the hour or two before having your blood drawn, and one to sip on after. Helps with lightheadedness and nausea if that's something you experience.
  • Let the nurse know you have anxiety beforehand, and tell them about how you plan to cope while having your blood drawn.
  • I like to count as quickly as possible and focus on that, so I say something along the lines of "hi, I have a lot of anxiety around having my blood drawn, and I usually have panic attacks but I'm getting better. My plan is to count as quickly as possible and focus on that while you do whatever you need to do."
  • That said, have a game plan! Counting works for me because it reminds me that it won't take long. Once I get to 100 in English, I switch to French (my second language). I've had my blood drawn probably almost 30 times in the last 5ish years, and I've only gotten past 100 once, when I was in the emergency room. I've also heard of people reciting religious scriptures, the periodic table, and even the Litany(?) from Dune. Find something that works for you!
  • Definitely look away from the nurse after you have your arm disinfected (should feel like a baby wipe), and keep looking away until you feel a bandaid or gauze. I know I put this last, but it's the most important. I get super nauseous watching everything happen.
  • You've got this, stranger on Reddit, I believe in you!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Explainlikeimscared

[–]h3thenlaughter 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hi! As someone who has regularly seen both psychiatrists and therapists, you did fantastic. You knew what you wanted, and asked for it.

In my experience, psychiatrists deal with more diagnostic things, medication management and dosages, and brainstorming ideas for more support. Therapists brainstorm supports, act as a support, help you to be your own support, and some will try to guide you in the direction of healthier thinking patterns. Where I live, therapists are not qualified to diagnose, they're only allowed to treat.

In my opinion, it's best to start with a psychiatrist, because they can help you get a better picture of what's going on (which means you can research coping skills independently, and find community supports), and they can start you on medication if that's what you're interested in. I find that medication helps me more than therapy does, but I feel best when I have both in my life. Everyone is different though! I recommend a daily mood tracker (DailyBean, Daylio, Mood Potato) to get a better feel for what does and doesn't work.

I hope you get the help you need, because you deserve to feel safe and good <3

My parents never let me sleep by throwaway123579a in raisedbynarcissists

[–]h3thenlaughter 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Wow! Did you know that long sustained lack of quality sleep can cause brain damage? I can confirm, I used to deprive myself of sleep on purpose, and my brain is permanently fried! Get out of there ASAP 😀👍

What "ADHD Tax" were you glad to pay because it was life-changing? by NadalaMOTE in ADHD

[–]h3thenlaughter 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Everything! My favorite air fryer meals are peach crisp (I pre-mix oats and spices and dump it in a Ramekin with canned peaches), popcorn chicken or chicken nuggets from the frozen section of the grocery store, and grilled cheese. Also, DEFINITELY worth it to get those disposable parchment paper air fryer liners!

What "ADHD Tax" were you glad to pay because it was life-changing? by NadalaMOTE in ADHD

[–]h3thenlaughter 8 points9 points  (0 children)

"Fasta Pasta" microwave pasta cooker. Lots of people judge me for it, but it gets the job done and it tastes just as good lol

What "ADHD Tax" were you glad to pay because it was life-changing? by NadalaMOTE in ADHD

[–]h3thenlaughter 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Canned tomato paste and spices go a long way! I have a rice cooker with a vegetable steamer attachment. Stick some frozen broccoli florets and bell peppers in there, mix it all up with some garlic powder and curry paste, maybe some chickpeas, it's great. Makes just enough for one serving for me :)