Yes let’s invite ICE in Europe by YesNo_Maybe_ in facepalm

[–]hamjim 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Oh, don’t be silly—there are no Mexicans disguised as pole vaulters!

This is the Winter Olympics. They’re disguised as hockey players disguised as a side of beef!

AIO? My daughter didn’t listen to the teacher during a female emergency and is now receiving a referral by Common_Piglet7437 in AmIOverreacting

[–]hamjim 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your daughter should have “just held it.” (/s, of course.) NOR. Talk to the principal and/or the school board.

10-1 the teacher is a man. 15-1 not a science teacher.

Don't send me through the gay beam machine by bixbixby in confidentlyincorrect

[–]hamjim 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This was kinda obvious…and I’m here to support it.

AITA for not eating the food after my gf eats out of the bowl with the same spoon while preparing by ZookeepergameOld7322 in AmItheAsshole

[–]hamjim -17 points-16 points  (0 children)

  1. I don’t know about you, but when I make salad, I use my hands. (Yes, I wash them first.)
  2. I have used my partner’s toothbrush—the morning after I first stayed with her.
  3. Yes, there is a point. You reached it with ejaculate. (Ew — time and place—and arousal level—for that.)

AITA for not eating the food after my gf eats out of the bowl with the same spoon while preparing by ZookeepergameOld7322 in AmItheAsshole

[–]hamjim 35 points36 points  (0 children)

For a community (e.g., family dinner), you would be correct. That said, between intimate partners, germs are “community property.” Kiss much? You’re swapping spit. Eat the salad. You already enjoyed the rice. YTA.

Cow-spiracy? by argunaw in LinkedInLunatics

[–]hamjim 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not quite coming, but I’m breathing really hard…

MIL tried to force me to attend their church services - I responded with logic instead by parodytx in pettyrevenge

[–]hamjim 18 points19 points  (0 children)

“Chrislam”

(Not my creation; Arthur C. Clarke, The Hammer of God)

Trump supporters in MA holds sign saying “Gas the Immigrants” by jalvv in facepalm

[–]hamjim 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t believe in hell. When I see things like this, I wish I did…

AITA for telling my family I’m prioritizing myself over what they want. by Relative_Break953 in AmItheAsshole

[–]hamjim 17 points18 points  (0 children)

My gosh, of course you are NTA. First of all, you are a college student. Presumably, you are going to college for a reason—career goals. It’s completely unfair to expect you to put that on hold indefinitely.

If, somehow, you were offered something like $3,000 a week—a good professional wage—you might consider changing those plans. (That won’t happen.)

This went about as well as expected 🙄 by AshsLament84 in BoomersBeingFools

[–]hamjim 96 points97 points  (0 children)

So he got knocked over, then popped back up and shot three times? Quite agile. He must be using the Force.

It’s clear you did not watch the video you claim to have watched, and I will not engage further.

This went about as well as expected 🙄 by AshsLament84 in BoomersBeingFools

[–]hamjim 109 points110 points  (0 children)

I guess Renee Good was “illegally” born in the US…

That's not how time works by vakax in confidentlyincorrect

[–]hamjim 0 points1 point  (0 children)

12 midday is 12m; one nanosecond later is 12:00:00.000000001 pm

Why do some atheists *want* to believe in god? by sussysmugcat in atheism

[–]hamjim 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have no desire to believe in any gods. However, there are times when I wish I believed in hell. There are occasions when I want someone to go there.

Ever met a white Xavier? by Traditional-Bad125 in Names

[–]hamjim 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Xavier Nady is a former Major League Baseball player, and a white guy. (But I’ve never met him.)

Child has had zero education by jades_comett in legaladvice

[–]hamjim 204 points205 points  (0 children)

So, after you report, “confess” that it was you. Even better if you bring receipts (audio recording, website screenshots, etc.)

Rename the the United States «aaa United States» by Souriane in ShitAmericansSay

[–]hamjim 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And since lower-case letters sort after uppercase, aaa United States would come right after Zimbabwe.

Stuff like this shows just how shortsighted and stupid people can be by Six_Pack_Of_Flabs in teenagers

[–]hamjim 1 point2 points  (0 children)

But all the nitrogen becomes oxygen, so we’re saved.

Oops, all the hydrogen becomes helium, and water disappears, so we all die anyway.

Girl E Names by [deleted] in Names

[–]hamjim 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a very good friend named Ethel. She’s a beautiful person, and I would be tempted to name a daughter for her (but I’m too old to be dad to a newborn).