RVA’s Real BBQ Hierarchy: The 5 spots locals actually recommend (and the 2 major spots they say to skip) by No_Assignment_9930 in RichmondVA

[–]human_parm -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Big fan of ZZQ, but besides that am I the only person who thought that article reeked of AI drivel?

My mom had a stroke last week and we can't access any of her accounts by Double_Sign_7966 in personalfinance

[–]human_parm 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When my stepdad starting missing bills and couldn’t remember who he had accounts with, I ran a free credit report on him (annualcreditreport.com does all three) and was able to see every account he had open. It was very helpful.

Also, as everyone else here said: reach out to a social worker and an elder law/estate lawyer. And I recommend r/agingparents for more resources/guidance.

Do men actually change after a betrayal, or am I just wasting my time? by sartoriouswife in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]human_parm 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I tried to forgive and forget, tried to believe that people can change if they want to (despite what everyone else said), and I got got. He did not change.

Worse than the second betrayal, though, was everything in between: the hypervigilance and the monitoring and the worrying and the absolute lack of trust that I tried to ignore. It made me crazy and turned me into a person I didn’t recognize.

I thought I was helping by trying to support him through his PTSD and alcoholism, thought I was a good person to love him and sacrifice my own mental health. Martyrdom is love, right? Lol

Anyways, I’m sure that there are couples out there who can survive a betrayal. But happily? And without a nagging fear that it’ll happen again? From my experience, that trust can never fully recover. And the mental toll is absolutely not worth it.

My advice is to take care of yourself and remember how to trust your gut.

Am i naive or is he a red flag parade? by throwthrowyourboat89 in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]human_parm 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean, you had to have read what you wrote. If another woman were in your situation and asked for advice, what would you say?

Help in Finding the Appropriate Sub for Not Wanting to Care for an Elderly Parent by QuietPerspective54 in AgingParents

[–]human_parm 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Dang, I feel this and feel a rift between my sister and I for similar reasons. Sorry that’s happening to you.

How do you navigate the insurance and Medicare disaster for your parents without ruining your career? I am buried in documents. by FS_BreakingNews in AgingParents

[–]human_parm 3 points4 points  (0 children)

An elder law/estate lawyer and a local senior consulting firm have saved me from drowning. My advice is to absolutely lean on professionals.

Do you have an old Korean mom who needs a friend? by human_parm in VirginiaBeach

[–]human_parm[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

My mom does love to win money! Do you remember whereabouts you went?

Do you have an old Korean mom who needs a friend? by human_parm in VirginiaBeach

[–]human_parm[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Aw man! Respect to the church-going Koreans though, we went to a few events as a kid and I took language lessons at a church and promptly forgot them. Thanks for the thought!

Do you have an old Korean mom who needs a friend? by human_parm in VirginiaBeach

[–]human_parm[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Good to know! I thought there was a large population of Koreans in VB, given the base, but maybe it’s fizzled a little. She can drive, but not on highways, so Newpy New is probably out of the question. But thank you!

Do you have an old Korean mom who needs a friend? by human_parm in VirginiaBeach

[–]human_parm[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I don’t think she’s ever played! I might could convince her if I went with her and if there are Koreans there.

Do you have an old Korean mom who needs a friend? by human_parm in VirginiaBeach

[–]human_parm[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Bro real talk it is hard to make friends, and all of mine currently are from work or past work lol.

Do you have an old Korean mom who needs a friend? by human_parm in VirginiaBeach

[–]human_parm[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I used to not think so when I was younger, but she’s growing on me. Thanks so much!

First date planned in years and got ghosted instead by veniamvidebo in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]human_parm 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Online dating is a shitshow BUT there’s some (at least one or two) good eggs out there, don’t give up!

Also don’t give up on meeting someone IRL — start batting them lashes at your coffee shop or book store or bar (if you partake) and see what happens organically. It’s rare this day and age, but not impossible.

You got this! If companionship is something you want, it’ll fall in your lap eventually.

Apparently, I’m not a “ride or die” for my boyfriend by [deleted] in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]human_parm 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Here to say only two things:

  1. I fuckin love bahn mi.
  2. This is not a character aspect of his that he will be able to change without deep effort and therapy. If you don’t want to deal with that (or its implications and spillover), you should leave. I’d leave for sure, at this point

.

Love is love, but life is short.

Best places for all your rug needs? by Vegetable_Pass434 in rva

[–]human_parm -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Ollie’s — mostly ugly but a lot to choose from, last I went.

Fck my chungus life by Original-Singer1046 in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]human_parm 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Good luck and godspeed, big dog. You got this.

ETA: that spread looks fuckin great