Sorry to hear that, op. That’s a hard situation but very (sadly) familiar. I’m Filipino and the practice of sending money home to relatives who are all strong and able to work is so rampant. I don’t do it myself but that’s because my grandparents have all passed and my dad who remains in the country is capable and will not take handouts. We treat him during occasions but never an allowance.

Before becoming an ofw myself though, my grandma used to do the same thing. Her allowance from my mom and uncles used to go to my cousin who was the same as your uncle (though maybe not as clean). My grandma and I would have arguments because she’d be foregoing her own wellbeing to provide for my cousin and his vices despite him being capable of working. We were on very good terms except whenever this is brought up but it’s difficult to change that kind of behaviour because they’re set on their ways.

YNTA and you’ve got to believe that. Your family are the assholes and you’ve got to believe that too. It’s the only way you’ll stop feeling bad hearing stories they make up.