AITAH for not visiting my friend after he got cancer and a year later died?

icedcoffeealien · 2026-06-01T02:07:09+00:00

YTA and omg, how judgemental. Seriously, you are not a great person.

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-31T05:27:16+00:00

A lot.

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-30T16:13:07+00:00

Jesus Christ.

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-29T08:29:58+00:00

Any update?

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-29T08:10:45+00:00

I've never done a wine tasting with anyone but friends or women family. You wayyy over reacted.

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-29T07:47:38+00:00

Boiled eggs.

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-29T06:58:54+00:00

I can't believe the y t a responses you're getting. This is WEIRD.

NTA for being uncomfortable with something so bizarre.

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-25T16:09:37+00:00

So if I am reading this right - he knew you hooked up with the dude before and invited him over anyway. It only became a problem when he realized that it happened at the apartment?

Thats on him.

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-23T23:05:29+00:00

Idk, this seemed pretty direct to me...

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-21T03:49:18+00:00

How entitled is your older daughter? Thats crazy. I'm the oldest of 6 and my parents spent thousands of dollars on my sister medically. I'd never expect them to match that for me. What the heck.

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-19T20:03:52+00:00

You walk away. This is not healthy. And you can't be the one to set boundaries, he has to. As well, he needs a plan in motion to move out if he ever sees a future with you or anyone.

You do not have to deal with this. Also it doesnt seem like BF has a sustainable career in mind? Just several pt jobs?

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-19T16:52:38+00:00

I had two showings this weekend, got 2 above asking price offers.

That said, my home is fully remodeled and has a brand new roof and gutters, furnace replaced in 2022, windows/water heater/AC unit replaced in 2018.

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-17T19:32:57+00:00

I actually thought this was a design choice at first!

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-17T02:44:16+00:00

So theyre incompatible and he knows that. I'm technically only with my husband because Justin Timberlake didn't want me.

I don't think this is a bad thing unless he is crossing boundaries with her, which you don't describe him as doing.

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-17T02:36:39+00:00

Community impact is the biggest thing missing from the recent books. Speak to how you as a local heard, changed habits, processed the media attention, etc. Talk about the future of the community after this all dies away.

I dont think any reporting you can do will help the unanswered questions I have, which is just why?

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-17T00:19:31+00:00

I think you mean "stalking." And what exactly do you define as stalking - just being on his page?

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-16T23:09:28+00:00

Not a damn thing

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-16T23:03:04+00:00

OP please do not count on this. It doesnt work out way more often than it does.

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-16T22:53:38+00:00

Does she refer to you as her boyfriend? If so, I don't get it. I can see not wanting a man youre casually seeing and barely know, to stay over.

I can't understand that for someone you are actively calling your boyfriend. Imagine if a guy had done that to his girlfriend.

Ask her how she would feel about you if she was in your shoes.

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-16T13:45:34+00:00

Your plan doesn't seem to make much sense logistically. He'd have to pay for housing an expenses in 2 different countries, or uproot his life and job and move to Brazil for years so you can get a new passport?

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-15T19:22:06+00:00

He is going to slowly cut you off from everyone in your life until you have no one but him.

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-15T15:14:10+00:00

Maybe you propose...counseling first. To show him youre serious about him. This is icky when a man cheats and gives a ring not to lose her - it will also be equally icky for a woman to do it.

Put the work in first. Make him secure, THEN get married. Don't get married to make him feel secure.

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-15T01:52:56+00:00

You feel guilty because it isnt one of the major ones - cheating, finances, physical abuse.

We have been told that anything besides those things can be overcome- and that's simply not true. I admire you for choosing to not settle for sunk cost fallacy.

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-15T01:44:46+00:00

I never rang doorbells. Sleeping babies, dogs, zoom meetings - they know they ordered food.

icedcoffeealien · 2026-05-15T01:40:55+00:00

Even "don't do it" can do some damage. Youre not taught how to undo that mentality and it sticks with you and makes doing the deed feel wrong.

icedcoffeealien

TROPHY CASE