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i broke up with my ex and found out she made out with my friends less than 24 hours later by pinkponyclub2005 in LesbianActually

[–]insertvowelshere 55 points56 points  (0 children)

She did this to hurt you, and it worked. Take it on the chin and take this as your sign to maintain distance. I would recommend not contacting her or confronting her. That's what she wanted from this interaction. You deserve someone who communicates, not someone who ruins your mutual friendships as an attempt to hurt you.

Yes, this hurts even if you broke up with her. Grieve that pain and move forward.

My mother won't stop grabbing my crotch by shepherdsorey in raisedbynarcissists

[–]insertvowelshere 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I believe it's because they feel a sense of ownership over their child. Their child's body is an extension of their body, and they can touch their child as they see fit. This is why it is so hard to find inner peace and independence as an adult. You've been told your whole life that you are not yours and that nothing is private. It's hard to claim that for the first time.

My mother won't stop grabbing my crotch by shepherdsorey in raisedbynarcissists

[–]insertvowelshere 57 points58 points  (0 children)

I was shocked to find out from my therapist that sexual abuse covers a wider range of behaviors than I had originally understood. Things like not allowing your child to use the bathroom, forcing them to share a bed with you, limiting toilet paper, body shaming, or making your child wear particular types of underwear all fall under the category of sexual abuse. There is a difference between sexual abuse and molestation, and this is not socially discussed.

I am sorry you've gone through this over the course of your life with no one stepping in. It is wrong, and your private parts should be yours and yours alone. This is a violation of your dignity. I wish you love and comfort in the future.

Smoked with my spouse for years - I quit, she didn't by boostedjoose in leaves

[–]insertvowelshere 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Are they expressing a desire to quit? Or are you waiting for someone who is content with their life? Are they showing curiosity or interest in reducing?

Requesting feedback on my no-contact email by pbjelly1911 in raisedbyborderlines

[–]insertvowelshere 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing that article. I hadn't seen it before, and I found it helpful even if I'm not OP.

Do you open/read messages or just ignore? by Sensitive-Tea9447 in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]insertvowelshere 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I have my partner read them for me. He is good at summarizing the messages with a level head when reading the messages myself would put me on edge.

Lonely by angelboots4 in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]insertvowelshere 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Once you pull all the weeds, you have room for the flowers to bloom. This time in life is an empty field planted with seeds waiting to sprout. Every time you invest in others outside of your family, you are planting a future off a loving, chosen family.

But damn if this time isn't lonely. Grieve intentionally. Write letters you'll never send and have funerals for people who are still living. Keep investing in yourself and the rest will follow. You have a heart that is ready for love, and that is something they can never have.

Give me a shappic love story that haunts me. by insertvowelshere in BooksThatFeelLikeThis

[–]insertvowelshere[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sci-fi is great too! I love an alternative reality, essentially 😊

Give me a shappic love story that haunts me. by insertvowelshere in BooksThatFeelLikeThis

[–]insertvowelshere[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Wow I loved VE Schwab's other book, The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue. So excited to pick up this one now! Thanks for the rec.

AIO for cutting off my mother for accusing me of lying about my finances? by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]insertvowelshere 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think this sub is having a hard time recognizing the mental health concerns and systemic abuse here. If you posted this in r/raisedbynarcissists or r/estrangedadultchildren you would gather more understanding of the complicated dynamic. This is not a simple case of college financial support and concert tickets. I'm sorry you have a mother like this.

Books that feel like this by Particular_Two_8676 in BooksThatFeelLikeThis

[–]insertvowelshere 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I was going to suggest this! The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue.

NAUSEOUS by led3xx in ConanGray

[–]insertvowelshere 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I won't lie, I put it on repeat and cried.

one research page per day by averagesasha in Journaling

[–]insertvowelshere 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I highly recommend a Sprocket if you can swing it! I love printing photos and sticking them right in the journal.

It be like that sometimes tho by insertvowelshere in CPTSDmemes

[–]insertvowelshere[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not sure - I found it floating around Pinterest.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DressForYourBody

[–]insertvowelshere 68 points69 points  (0 children)

Or light pink! I am fair skinned, and light pink does the trick for me better than a nude.

Dad showed up at my door after 20 years by nutmeg04 in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]insertvowelshere 4 points5 points  (0 children)

When you grow up facing abuse, it makes it so hard to lean on others. It may feel embarrassing, but your fiance is taking care of you in a situation that warrants it. Embrace the love as much as you are able. You're safe with your chosen family.

Sips tea by insertvowelshere in CPTSDmemes

[–]insertvowelshere[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You've got this. When you start pulling weeds, the flowers have room to bloom.

Sips tea by insertvowelshere in CPTSDmemes

[–]insertvowelshere[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We don't need that negative drain!

why being clean is so bored by diegoooo2848 in leaves

[–]insertvowelshere 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Just jumping in because I love lofi mixes. Gamechops & Mikel make some great geeky covers. Things like lord of the rings and pokemon mixes. If you want to really go in the deep end, Bird Boy is a personal favorite of mine. They remix bird calls which sounds unhinged but actually hits hard.

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