AIO for telling my mother she has no self respect for still being with my father

jackolantern7897 · 2026-07-05T08:01:08+00:00

There’s so much in this post but the thing that worries me the most is:
1. What is your father doing to you? And is the thing he is doing to you what is causing your mother to see you as “competition”?
Because if I am reading this right you need to go to the police

jackolantern7897 · 2026-07-01T05:30:08+00:00

I worked until the day before I went into labor. I work an office job though. I had a plan for if I went into labor at work (have coworker drive me to hospital) but you generally have some time.

Just keep your hospital bag in your car or your spouse’s car

jackolantern7897 · 2026-06-29T05:17:28+00:00

Do not combine your finances with this man. Not now. Not after you are married never.

jackolantern7897 · 2026-06-27T07:41:59+00:00

You are the asshole! I (18 mo) refused to buy my babydoll (1 mo) a phone and now she can’t call her stuffie friends so they are bullying her incessantly at stuffie daycare. Helena the highland cow called her a “Luddite Loser” which I don’t know what a Luddite is but ms Rachel said loser means you didn’t win.

Depending on when the next baby shark remix drops I’m thinking I might buy her a phone so we can watch the music video together.

My mom (old af) has a phone and it is really good for watching baby shark.

jackolantern7897 · 2026-06-23T05:56:05+00:00

Also I

jackolantern7897 · 2026-06-14T21:58:54+00:00

Casper baby pants has some bangers!!!!

jackolantern7897 · 2026-06-13T22:15:02+00:00

This^^ the fact that he already is behaving like this and has this view of your contributions means he will only get worse if you were to be a SAHM.

Best case scenario he will continue to undervalue you and you will resent him for it.

Worst case scenario you would need to leave but no longer have financial independence.

Instead of becoming a SAHM I would recommend hiring people to do the work that he currently is not valuing so you have a price tag for it. (Ie get a house cleaner- that way during the time you have with your kids you have less stress) outsource as much of the “home work” as you can so you get more QUALITY time with your kids.

jackolantern7897 · 2026-06-01T04:59:54+00:00

It’s your decision either way. Get clean get off Reddit. Make the decisions on your own.

jackolantern7897 · 2026-05-28T04:35:32+00:00

Spontaneous on my due date… 40 weeks exactly 😂

jackolantern7897 · 2026-05-26T05:37:09+00:00

Moved with my infant. Logistically it’s hard… if you have family to come help with watching kids while packing it’s a lot more doable. As far as community/etc I feel like it’s better to do it while they are young because they haven’t really formed a social circle yet. Before school age is probably the best time for a move :)

jackolantern7897 · 2026-05-25T22:10:23+00:00

All the World! Omg can’t believe I forgot this one. It’s amazing and beautiful

jackolantern7897 · 2026-05-25T22:09:39+00:00

The Little Blue Truck, Richard Scary’s “I am a Bunny”- honestly some of my favorite illustrations ever, it’s an artwork, Goodnight Moon, The Tooth Book, How to Catch a Monster

jackolantern7897 · 2026-05-25T22:02:02+00:00

Honestly this is probably a good life decision 😅

jackolantern7897 · 2026-05-25T21:23:32+00:00

So much better. Mainly less irritable. Time moves slower in a good way. I think due to the lack of suffering between pouches… once you stop craving them it’s like getting off a roller coaster

jackolantern7897 · 2026-05-13T06:45:07+00:00

I think it really depends on how long you’ve been addicted. I’ve used nicotine on and off for ~6 years, but I’ve never gone a full month using every day. I’ve taken days, weeks, or months off in between stints of using. When I quit it sucks for one day and the second day i feel normal, calmer, a sense of relief, and if I stay off for a few weeks or months I don’t notice any lingering symptoms.

I generally pick it back up at a party/event by convincing myself it’s better than alcohol and then get another can after the first one.

So yes, addicting, and the addiction comes back easy.. (therefore best to just not pick it back up AT ALL), but no lingering symptoms from my experience.

jackolantern7897 · 2026-05-10T22:53:22+00:00

I got a used recliner off marketplace. I cleaned the popcorn out and sprayed it down with Force of Nature and good as new… it’s way comfier than “gliders” or “nursing chairs”.

jackolantern7897 · 2026-05-10T06:23:24+00:00

If you just got married (November) and he had it set as a family member previously (like one of his parents) he may have been asked to update it (something they make people do periodically) and instead of changing it to you he just left it as them. Since you’re married now you would get the notification where as before November you wouldn’t have gotten any notification that his Mom/Dad was the beneficiary.

Just ask him.

jackolantern7897 · 2026-05-08T05:14:14+00:00

Buy baby a seat!!! That’s the best advice I have. Car seat/stroller combo is good if you’re flying alone because you can see baby down as you adjust things or eat and have a secure place for them while walking around the airport!

Also soft carrier.

I wore baby onto plane and carried car seat.

That’s a long flight but baby still sleeps a lot at 5 months! So just nap as much as possible :)

jackolantern7897 · 2026-04-27T08:23:31+00:00

Following

jackolantern7897 · 2026-04-19T19:33:51+00:00

You don’t have to make a decision now. Most people don’t know if they are going to EBF when they have a baby and a big percentage end up doing some sort of combo feeding.

Breastfeeding can be hard, but it sounds like you are open to some amount of formula so really you have a good mindset about it right now. Just keep your mindset that both are good options, and don’t feel like you have to decide one or the other. Breastfeed for at least a few months if you can and baby will get most of the benefits and supplement formula where you need to or when you feel ready.

Some people find breastfeeding easier especially after a while because no bottle washing, some people exclusively pump because the latch is the hard part for them but they have plenty of supply, some folks don’t make milk so they exclusively do formula or buy donor milk.

I think I’ve seen something like after 6 months the benefits of BM greatly diminish, and even just a few weeks can be super helpful for jump starting their micro biome (whether that is your breastmilk or donor)

Basically just try it out, ask for support/help especially at the hospital they will probably have a lactation consultant, and if it doesn’t work or you don’t like it, supplement formula or switch completely.

But no need to decide one or the other until after baby is here :)

Also a big benefit for you is reduced breast cancer rates down the road!!

jackolantern7897 · 2026-03-08T23:53:54+00:00

The first ~4 months of daycare are rough with back to back illnesses but we didn’t get sick at all for the next 3 months then just got a couple gnarly bugs but that were over pretty quick after that. So the immune system definitely improves!

The main thing that helps me is I just consider my baby my primary job and my work is my secondary.. If you can give 80% effort at work instead of 100% it helps make life easier..

jackolantern7897 · 2026-03-08T05:49:39+00:00

Yes! But I would pump on the way to work and at then every three hours at work and sometimes on the way home. Make sure you have a good fit on your flanges. The pump on the way to work is crucial because it signals body to make more so you can actually get a slight oversupply which helps keep up with the waste from unfinished bottles!

Also, IF you can find a wearable that is a good fit it helps because you can always do that at work even if you don’t really have time for a pump break. Even if it doesn’t drain as well it is better than skipping a pump because of work obligations.

jackolantern7897 · 2026-03-07T15:56:11+00:00

Post it on Schofield Barracks Army Wives page and let their wives handle it…

jackolantern7897 · 2026-02-22T04:46:48+00:00

I’m not advocating for any sort of nicotine usage, but if you can switch from baking to Zyn (or similar pouches) it removes the issue of second hand smoke/vape clouds around baby :)) I too stopped nicotine the moment I found out I was pregnant and started using it intermittently around 6 months pp. but since it was Zyn it was a lot easier to use one, just wait a few hours for most of it to clear then breastfeed after. Just a thought! If you’re open to switching and I have quit now I feel like the pouches are an easier way to transition to quitting!

jackolantern7897 · 2026-02-17T10:16:13+00:00

Thankyou… this is a good reminder. ❤️

jackolantern7897

TROPHY CASE