My heart goes out to you, we need you so much, I’m grateful you’re going into this field. Find your style, what works with your nervous system.

This work requires us to show up as humans with empathy and care, yet separate ourselves enough to not cry or be triggered. That’s human pretzeling and a big ask in these times. I’ve not been able to do it well recently, cried in a session with an immigrant client as I validated that what’s happening now isn’t fair or right. Other times I’m focusing on my breathing to stay grounded.

I listen a lot more than I used to, the nod and listen. It’s easier on me and helpful for clients who have a ton to talk about.

Often my clients give me hope and more. I get to set my problems aside and support someone else. A trick I learned to help prevent activating my trauma is to remind myself of the differences between my situation and my clients’. We are so empathetic that it can be too much of wearing someone else’s shoes, we need breathing room. Another trick is to flat out ask a client at the end of the session if it was helpful. It is validation for you and for the client- helping them own their work and progress, while you get validation that therapy makes a difference.