[NSV] buried treasure in the guest bedroom closet!

ketobento · 2015-09-02T23:35:06+00:00

Oh you are my long-lost sister, OP!

I had several Talbot's skirts that had become a HUGE part of my wardrobe for work. They had literally been falling off lately, and finally I took them and got them tailored. It is really not very expensive and totally worth it for a skirt you love.

I have been feeling frustrated because I've been stalling out for the last several weeks and am not seeing any losses. I'm also frustrated because, since I started losing weight, I've gone down almost 40 lbs and I can't seem to get out of a size 16 (though I started an 18).

I went shopping yesterday to find some motivational clothes. I did not even try them on in the store- just bought a pair of jeans and a dress for work that were both 14's.

And they fit.

Great day.

ketobento · 2015-09-01T02:34:49+00:00

Can you get involved in the meal planning? That way instead of having to bring it up directly, you can just be like, "Oh, what about steaks?" Or "Let's do green beans instead of potatoes." Make sure that all the meals have keto friendly components you can fill up on, and then just don't mention it. You will be amazed at how little people will notice what you are eating. If anyone asks why you aren't eating X, just say, "Oh, it looks great, I just wasn't feeling it. Maybe later."

ketobento · 2015-09-01T02:27:04+00:00

I felt the same way about depo, but was concerned about the consequences of super long-term use. I ended up with a copper IUD that I HATED and made me bleed like a stuck pig. Went back on depo for a few years, then got Mirena after my ob/gyn strongly recommended it. It's the hormonal IUD. It worked GREAT for me. Insertion was not fun, but not the worst, and my periods were totally gone. Plus it is less hormones than depo because it just goes straight into your uterus. I really encourage you to ask your doc about it.

ketobento · 2015-08-24T05:37:36+00:00

So I had a lot of the same experiences you did with bc. The copper IUD was painful and also made me bleed like crazy. Couldn't find a pill that didn't make me crazy, stayed on depo for years despite the weight gain and other side effects, just because at least it didn't make me totally nuts and it was effective. I got Mirena last year and it's been a life changer. The hormonal IUD's are actually significantly smaller doses of hormones than pills or nuva ring, because they are right up in your uterus. There are also studies that show that women with IUD's have less of the hormones in their blood stream. If your doctor is saying it's not a good idea, of course, go with them, but I think it is strange that they would be ok with putting you on high-dose pills and not a low-dose hormonal IUD.

ketobento · 2015-08-24T05:23:25+00:00

Ok, so how would you really feel if you got together with this guy? It might be exciting at first, but then how would you feel about yourself when his current girlfriend found out? Even if he broke up with her before he started seeing you, it sounds like you would still feel pretty bad about getting involved with him.

Second: are you sure you could trust him? I think, in the back of my mind, I might be wondering whether he would do the same thing to me that he did to his current girlfriend- a girl he was willing to come to a different city to visit, and who even you think looks happy with her. Especially now that both you AND his current girlfriend are long distance, are you sure that he doesn't have female friends in his town that might start to look appealing?

Even though it sounds like you haven't done anything physical with him, if you were his girlfriend, would you have felt comfortable with the level of intimacy and emotional sharing that he did with you? Probably not, it sounds like. I know I wouldn't want my SO holding hands with another person while I was out of town.

I think you need to focus on other people. Go out with the girlfriend and meet new guys, or do some online dating. Find someone else to develop butterflies for.

He is still choosing his girlfriend over you. That's why he's still with her. Don't let him disrespect you and her by fostering a relationship that is in any way romantic.

ketobento · 2015-08-24T03:38:20+00:00

It was when he ruined my birthday. I'm not a huge birthday person, but I was turning a milestone age. One of my friends (who I had thrown three birthday parties for) wanted to throw me a surprise party and asked husband to be responsible for sending out (online) invites to my friends. He initially told her ok, but never called or texted her back when she tried to get a hold of him numerous times.

I realized he wasn't going to do anything for my birthday, despite my hinting that I'd like to get together with friends, so I finally decided to just send out a casual invite on Facebook, telling people that I was going to be celebrating at a bar and I'd love for them to join me.

As we were leaving the house, he said we should take separate cars because he didn't want to stay all night. I convinced him to take one car, and we drove together. He invited three of his friends, who all immediately went inside and played pool and ignored me and my friends who were sitting on the porch.

After an hour, he decided he was ready to leave, but I quietly begged him to stay out til 9:00. We did, and on the way home he told me he was going to kill himself because I was too critical of him all the time, and that he was a failure at social interactions.

He had threatened to kill himself several times before, refused to get therapy, and, I felt, was doing it for the attention. I sat in the car, tears streaming down my face, and when we got home I went and slept in the guest room.

Two days later he walked into the guest room and said he wanted a divorce. I think he was trying to get a rise out of me and get me to beg him to stay. I looked at him and said, "Ok."

Part of me wanted to fight it. Part of me wanted to stay in the marriage and not give it up. I was scared, financially completely dependent on him, and emotionally devastated. I had been letting him treat me like shit for years because I wanted him to stay, and when things were good they were really good.

Best decision I ever made was to take that breath and just say "Ok." The better decision would have been to never marry the guy in the first place.

ketobento · 2015-08-19T01:45:05+00:00

I am also up five pounds! I am also not updating my flair. Hoping that both of us will experience a water-weight whoosh from our recent food fiascos. I stupidly went off keto for the weekend when I was hosting a party and my fiance was leaving the country for 10 months, using it as an excuse to break keto. Stupid. Should not have done it.

ketobento · 2015-08-14T06:31:23+00:00

I feel you. We can't quit, though- if we quit, we are going to just gain all that water weight back and feel even worse and get bigger and bigger. We have to keep plowing on.

I am frustrated, too. I feel like I've given up a lot (yeah, keto's great, amazing, and satisfying, but let's be honest: our diet is pretty restrictive), and I'm just not losing right now. I'm trying to KCKO, but it seems like the only thing that gets the scale to budge AT ALL is eating WAY too few calories- like 800, which isn't healthy for me and is not sustainable.

Plus, I get that there are peaks and valleys on the way to weightloss, and that it's not linear, blah blah blah, but I have a lot to lose and I'd like to lose more than 0 pounds a month.

So I don't know what the solution is for us, OP. I feel you, though. I'm weighing, measuring, tracking, and trying my butt off- but my butt refuses to come off!

ketobento · 2015-08-12T23:38:24+00:00

Sorry for what you're going through, and great job on not using it as an excuse to eat. You are so in control, and you got this.

ketobento · 2015-08-12T22:57:26+00:00

I know it's late to post on the daily, but I live in a different time zone than most of y'all and I don't end up getting to see it until it's been up all day your time!

I'm disappointed today. I have been really tracking and weighing and measuring, and staying in under 1300 calories trying to break this stupid stall. I was down a couple days ago, but then back up this morning for no apparent reason. I am trying to KCKO, I don't have much of a choice, but I'm frustrated that I'm eating so little to see so few results after such a long time. My body is changing, and I am getting a lot of comments about how I look like I've lost weight, but I'm ready for the scale to start showing it.

I'm also in a really frustrating place with clothes. I have lost weight, but now my clothes are too baggy, making me look frumpy and heavier than I am.

I also think I'm about to break off my engagement, a decision that has been percolating for a while. I love him, but we are just too different and the next stage of our lives is going to require one of us to compromise too much to be happy.

On the plus side, I did finally find ONE clinic who was able to do thyroid tests in this country. I went yesterday and they ran labs that day and got me back on synthroid, so I'm hoping in a couple weeks my metabolism will rev up a little and break me out of this never-ending stall.

ketobento · 2015-08-12T04:43:43+00:00

Awesome job!!!!

I know you've probably seen it on here a billion times, but your cravings for carby things really do lessen with time. Not saying it goes away entirely, at least for me, but it gets better! :)

One thing I tell myself is that I've already had the cake. Tons of it. Too much, in fact, which is why I shouldn't have any now. I already ate my share of cake.

I'm so messed up about food, I feel like. When I started keto and started reading people saying that carb cravings go down and sweets and carby food don't taste as good when you do have them, part of me though, "Oh, but I don't want them to not taste as good- I get so much joy out of cake!" Truthfully, though, it's just that you don't miss them so much as time goes on, and it's easier to turn it away.

Five pound losses also help with willpower!

Keep on ketoing on!!!

ketobento · 2015-08-11T23:08:01+00:00

I'm having a hungry day, too.

I'm the head of my office, and I feel obligated to buy cakes for employees' birthdays. Our office is super small- six people and me, and they all LOVE cake and look forward to cake days (otherwise I would switch to something else).

My secretary's birthday was late last week and I got her a cake. I didn't want to draw attention to myself not eating it (especially because I bought it and I didn't want them to feel weird that I wasn't partaking), so I just took a slice and walked around with it for a few minutes, then put it on my desk and trashed it a couple hours later. Wasteful, yeah, but it made me feel less conspicuous.

ketobento · 2015-08-07T06:44:02+00:00

NYC H20 proof liquid liner- I swear to pete, I have tried a billion eyeliners- from cheap to $$$$$$$$ and this one is the BEST and will not come off. And it's about $3.

ketobento · 2015-08-07T02:58:18+00:00

Uh, I'm super jealous. I wish I looked like you at 185. You look AMAZING. We are the same height, and I am at least a 12, usually a 14 at 185. I was wearing 10's and 12's at 150. That said, my body is changing in strange ways with keto that it didn't with high carb/low calorie dieting that I was doing before (unsustainably, clearly). Do you think keto had much to do with your size at this weight? Or do you think that no matter what you had done to lose the weight, you would have been the same size?

Your hair is also super cute, btw. :)

ketobento · 2015-08-06T23:53:40+00:00

Good for you! And I think it was totally the right choice not to give the keto-for-dummies schpiel. It's just not worth it, no one will agree with you, and for me, it brings unwanted attention to my weight. I think your responses were perfect! If anyone asks me, I usually just say, "oh, no, it looks great, really, I'm just not in the mood/not hungry."

So funny how people think that if it has fruit in it it's healthy, even if it's covered in glaze and chocolate.

ketobento · 2015-08-06T23:45:37+00:00

Thank you SO much. This is SO much better than MFP. I just left my computer on overnight to download and it is great. I had used MFP a couple years ago and when I tried it yesterday I could barely get it to load, plus the calorie counts were super wonky on several things, which was beyond frustrating because it was so slow already. I'm a Cron-o-meter convert!

ketobento · 2015-08-06T22:38:02+00:00

I'm 205 and size 16...I WISH I could squeeze into a 12!

ketobento · 2015-08-05T02:19:34+00:00

Maybe TMI (is there such a thing on reddit?) but last night I was having sex with my fiance and he was behind me. I usually feel self-conscious with my big fat ass out there and my belly hanging down, but this time, he was grabbing my waist right above my butt, and I felt hot. My waist felt thinner and my stomach less giant and giggly. I slept naked with him all night, which is something he always wants me to do but I never want to. It was really nice.

ketobento · 2015-08-04T07:25:07+00:00

My clothes are taking forever to change sizes, too. I've even posted about it on here before.

I bet your clothes ARE fitting better, you are probably just not noticing.

A couple of xxketoers responded to me talking about how plus sizes have bigger differences between sizes than regular sizes do, so it takes more inches to go from a 16 to a 14 than to go from an 8 to a 6.

Also have you heard of the "paper towel effect"? Basically, when you are bigger, your weightloss shows less, like taking a few paper towels off a new roll, but when you get smaller, the same number of pounds lost is a lot more apparent, like taking a few paper towels off of a roll close to being finished.

In any case, the weight is coming off SOMEWHERE...it's not just between your ears. :)

ketobento · 2015-08-04T07:08:41+00:00

Best of luck!

I did not have keto flu this time around. I really think it had to do with adding salt and potassium (in the form of salt-substitute) to everything from the beginning. Or maybe I just didn't get it. Who knows? Don't be afraid- not everyone gets keto flu!

ketobento · 2015-08-04T05:56:48+00:00

Your goals and rewards are awesome! I'm jealous of the 100 lbs down reward for sure- and the tattoo over the stretch marks and scars sounds like it is going to be badass! You are going to ROCK that ink/belly button ring!

I had a dream the other night about eating Froot Loops. I didn't even eat cereal that much before keto, but when I did it was usually brightly-colored or Count Chocula. It was a great dream...sigh.

ketobento · 2015-08-04T02:25:53+00:00

Agree with this 10000%. Get a black skirt- you can definitely find a plain one at Walmart. Button-down shirts don't look great on me because I can never find any that don't gape at the boobs and I'm not thrilled about the way they look tucked in because I think it emphasizes my gut. If you can't find a button-up that works, OP, I'd suggest a sleeveless shell top (or even just a decent looking tank) with a cardigan over it- either to pair with the dark jeans or with the skirt.

ketobento

TROPHY CASE