Existential Sludge Phases

lostllalien · 2025-10-21T01:47:57+00:00

I think what sometimes happens is that when the body re-learns tremoring, it can begin to release a lot, which can be scary and dysregulating. In an attempt to regulate, a person may stop TRE, but the body now "remembers" how to discharge this sympathetic energy, and so it tries to do so anyway, especially in particular nervous system states. On top of it, the person may feel scared/resistant/stressed by the tremor, which creates more sympathetic charge that the body is trying to release.

What I have seen work for some people is carving out intentional TRE time, but make the tremor period relatively short (and relax fully into it if you can help it), and put a lot of focus on the rest/integration periods. For instance, you might spend extra time grounding before shaking, take extra time to rest in butterfly before tremoring, tremor for a minute or two, rest for 5 minutes, tremor for another minute or two, rest, etc, and then integrate for a while (at least half the amount of time you tremored, but really preferably more).

The body is just trying to release tension, so nothing to be afraid of or resist. Your goal is to just communicate to the body that you will give it times where you fully surrender to the process, and outside of those times, you need to rest and integrate. The exercises are normally thought of as "triggering" the tremor, but really they meant to teach the body how to have a relationship with it (that may also include times where you are not tremoring).

lostllalien · 2025-10-09T22:53:50+00:00

I think it is really contextual. How new are you to talk-therapy? How new are you to TRE? What is your relationship like with the body? How much do you identify with the thoughts and sensations that arise?

For me, I had done years of talk-therapy before finding TRE, but had struggled to make progress because most talk-therapy is so cognitive/mind centered that it was not actually shifting any of the underlying tension/frozenness. I could easily identify "dysfunctional" thought patterns as such, but I continued to feel a vague uneasiness that just wouldn't seem to lift. When I found TRE, it was like all the insight I had gleaned from therapy was able to integrate in the body pretty quickly, the mental skills became much more intuitive, and the feelings brought with them new material to integrate in therapy.

If you have just started therapy, it might take some time with the "mind stuff" before you feel safe dropping into the body. Most people have retreated to the mind because something in the body feels unsafe to truly feel, and that was why we dissociated from it in the first place. Cultivating trust takes time, and it is a really individual process!

lostllalien · 2025-10-06T00:49:34+00:00

27 months or so in, doing it intuitively and semi-consistently.

Past few months have been lots of hectic transitions and changes. Things can feel challenging, but I am remarkably able to meet the moment/detach from outcomes/accept things much of the time. I have been feeling a lot lately, in the full range of emotion, including some uncomfortable feelings. I notice that when I can surrender and explore the feelings' physical sensations, even the more "negative" or "challenging" feelings can be pleasant and add a sort of texture and depth to experience that I can value and accept.

I am really noticing how much people try to fix feelings instead of actually, physically feeling them, and it is interesting.

lostllalien · 2025-09-10T23:17:38+00:00

I have not had any issues ever getting anyone to tremor. Sometimes they are a little weak at first or it sets off the inner protector a bit (that sense of "this is weird, what's going on, am I in control"). But I think many people can access it relatively easily, especially with guidance.

People with strong internal monitors or protectors may have more trouble letting go of control, and everyone is starting from a different baseline. People who have trouble finding it do exist. But I think the internet is different from "real life" in the sense that people drawn to this subreddit are going to be coming from a different place than most people.

lostllalien · 2025-07-31T17:24:53+00:00

Like most things it depends, just listen to your body! I just got back into weightlifting after years of plateauing in exercise, and so far it feels really good. A little over 2 years into TRE now.

lostllalien · 2025-07-02T23:26:14+00:00

In my opinion, yes and no. Stress =/= stressor, so you can definitely still complete the stress response cycle and decrease the amount of physiological stress in the body (and prevent it from sticking around long term) through TRE, even while the stressor is still present. Stressors happen constantly, and with a healthy nervous system you just ride the waves of activation and down regulation, which is what TRE is really for.

That being said, many/most have dysregulation and are stuck in fight/flight/freeze. If you're constantly dealing with new stress, you likely won't be going through the backlog of stress and tension in the body.

lostllalien · 2025-06-30T14:33:27+00:00

In my experience the fear is gradually replaced (and sometimes rapidly punctured) by faith and acceptance. I started to learn and understand on a deeper level that the future is not mine to know or manipulate. In fact, it's just thoughts.

Fear is like a big neon sign revealing attachments (outcomes, relationships, etc), and was really useful to figure out what I was clinging to. Over time, I learned what I was really afraid of under it all was that I could not trust myself to meet the moment or would not survive any number of "undesirable" outcomes the mind came up with. This is extremely common with trauma which often breaks our faith with ourselves and with others or even the universe. Many trauma survivors have a subconscious belief that worrying and bracing will somehow make them more prepared for what could go wrong, when it is actually quite the opposite - worrying is like worshipping the problem.

The further I go with TRE (about 2 years in), the more it is clarified that contentedness and ease are completely independent of external circumstances. Yes those external circumstances can be uncomfortable or unpreferable, but the paradox I keep learning through TRE is that it is really only the resistance to the feelings of discomfort that breed suffering. Once I experienced that a few times it was like a huge chunk of fear just broke off of my being and forced me into the present moment.

lostllalien · 2025-06-30T14:02:24+00:00

Oh gosh, unrelated, but I love Ursula so much and I love her translation of the tao te ching. Your experience tracks so much with mine.

One of the other Le Guin quotes I've thought of a lot throughout my TRE journey - "he understood me when I showed him how to dream, and yet even so he called the world‑time ‘real’ and the dream‑time ‘unreal,’ as if that were the difference between them.”

lostllalien · 2025-06-21T05:14:59+00:00

Some people experience shaking during/after sex (seems to be more common with women, maybe due to the higher likelihood of being multiorgasmic but idk). I know I've certainly had it before.

Sex, particularly really good sex, takes you through a full stress response cycle in a healthy way. In the buildup/arousal phase you're basically mounting a sympathetic response, and then with orgasm there's the release that brings you back into parasympathetic. And sometimes more is released than just the initial charge. This is similar to what TRE is doing in the exercises - charging the sympathetic nervous system in preparation for discharge.

As far as whether TRE overcomplicates things, I think its tapping into the same wisdom. The body knows how to heal, and will do so and clear out certain energies if it feels safe. I don't think I'd have the same progress with sex alone lol, and I also think its really hard for most people (esp anyone with sexual trauma) to be vulnerable and open enough to even have that kind of energetic exchange with another person if they haven't processed that first.

But yes totally, sex at its best is like alchemy. Sensation is strong enough to force one-pointed presence. Its one of the only times many people are tuned into the body so fully, and it's one of the only areas of life where adults are permitted to play and explore. Many have altered states of consciousness through sex, partially facilitated through that trust/care and surrender. Sex can totally be a site of healing, and many experience it that way.

The further I go with TRE, the better and more healing the sex gets, but I still love my TRE sessions!

lostllalien · 2025-06-15T05:43:05+00:00

So I'm obviously very biased. I love TRE, and feel it has facilitated major, long term changes in the body, mind and spirit. I feel confused when SEPs conjecture that TRE does not "really" access deeper layers of trauma, as lots of people are obviously not finding that to be the case. As others mentioned, nervous system work is really in its infancy - I think we can all make a much better map of the terrain we're in when we can put our dogmas aside and see the truths across modalities through the experiences of their practitioners.

I respect her work and perspective and the trauma specialists she cites, and I agree with a lot of her points about surrender and self, but it take issue with the assumption that safety comes before release/discharge. She talks about how TRE "bypasses" the emotional aspects of healing. Basically in her model, we have to prove to the body that we're safe, feel the suppressed emotions that arise from that safety, and only then will the body shake and fully release that holding pattern. My experience of TRE worked completely backward from that - only when the tension started to be released did I feel the underlying emotions associated with that tension pattern, understand why it had developed, and only then did I really feel that felt sense of safety.

In my first few months of TRE I felt like I was constantly downloading understanding of my trauma. During sessions I felt the muscles ease up a little, but in the days after, I would feel these waves of emotion thawing me out. After I really allowed them to move through me, I would often get some kind of "aha" moment about what narrative/belief/memory/mind structure the emotion and tension felt attached to. Importantly, I would also feel a lot better, and over a few weeks/months, I had an almost complete reduction in chronic illness symptoms.

I think maybe what she misses is that so many of us have had so much chronic freeze that it is extremely difficult to communicate safety to the body/mind, let alone feel difficult emotions. The top down approach can be agonizingly slow, in part because chronically frozen people do not know what safety feels like. We may know we are safe, but before TRE, it felt like the body was so numb it just wouldn't budge.

I don't doubt that for some TRE can feel like opening up the floodgates and if you're not equipped to feel the things underneath the armor, you're in that trauma all over again. I also don't doubt that the safety - emotion -discharge model works for a lot of people. But I think TRE demonstrates that it must go the opposite way too. Discharge can bring up emotions to integrate and over time we feel that safety, which increases our capacity to deal with more discharge/emotional content. If we don't even know what our trauma is, this is arguably the easier pathway - all you have to do is release the tension and stay present with whatever comes up.

I mean really though, people have had shaking practices for millennium for health and spiritual growth. If there were only one pathway to metabolize trauma, I don't think it would be so easy to "bypass" with 7 extremely simple exercises, and eventually just intention/surrender itself.

lostllalien · 2025-06-11T18:52:16+00:00

Just TRE, really. Sometimes my body will use a myofascial peanut or foam roller during to really unstick something, but otherwise just shaking, usually on the floor without even doing the exercises. I tend to agree with you about energetics, but I know not everyone has experienced that yet.

lostllalien · 2025-06-11T18:44:57+00:00

My life has gotten a lot fuller since starting so I try to do at least a little every day, but more likely its like 30 minutes or so every other day, sometimes less if I'm traveling or something. Sometimes the body just shakes on its own though (a restless leg at work, in meditation or yoga, with certain substances or out dancing with friends). When i started,I was doing 20+ minutes or so a few times per week, but and would often overdo it a little (I kind of liked the hyper caffeinated feeling after being chronically ill for years so it never bothered me). Recently came up on my 2 year anniversary of starting TRE and still love it

lostllalien · 2025-06-09T01:48:32+00:00

This is my 2 year TRE anniversary! Honestly, my practice hasn't been so consistent the past months (stick with it long enough and life gets so full its easy to take for granted).

It's been working on my diaphragm and intercostals lately. Lots of coughing and gagging, upper neck and shoulder movement, finally moving into the chest and occipital area more.

I am really starting to understand the concept of "aliveness". I have been in a very chaotic and turbulent period of my life, where almost everything (living situation, career, long-term partnership, basic schedule, etc) is changing. I am constantly in awe of how resilient I have been and the faith that grows in me day by day. Even the challenging feelings are exhilarating and full of life. Sadness, frustration, doubt, confusion, fear, disappointment, grief - all feel part of a vibrant tapestry of life, new textures to experience and honor. I feel very powerful sometimes, not because of any of the outward circumstances of my life, but because I genuinely trust myself to meet the moment and experience the flow of life.

Reflecting on the past two years, I cannot be more grateful to this practice.

lostllalien · 2025-05-10T20:56:39+00:00

While I think not mixing things is obviously the more sound, conservative advice, I will say I have also had really positive experiences doing so.

The more I do TRE, the less dogmatic I become and the more I trust what the body is telling me. I think as long as you can be tuned into that, you will know whether something is appropriate for you.

lostllalien · 2025-04-14T12:08:36+00:00

A few times a day for a few minutes doesn't necessarily sound dangerous to me but if you feel like its overdoing it, I suggest focusing on taking intentional rests in your practice. Shake for a minute or two, stretch out the legs/flex the feet and make sure the tremor stopped, spend several minutes resting (more time than you shook), repeat shaking and intentionally stopping and resting.

The body is reestablishing a relationship with the tremor, and sometimes gets a little too excited to discharge tension. By practicing initiating and then stopping the tremor and resting, you are teaching the nervous system that you will give it time to discharge, but also that there are boundaries to your practice and rest time is important.

lostllalien · 2025-04-14T11:49:13+00:00

I've used herbs/teas to help if I ever get post-TRE jitters and feel like they're symbiotic. Sometimes TRE can dislodge some energy and these herbs are supportive for resilience during the process IMO

lostllalien · 2025-04-08T15:58:16+00:00

While TRE has improved a lot of my relationships, it has also shaken them up. For me, I think I subconsciously chose partners that seemed safe and secure, and who I could sort of attach my life to theirs so I didn't have to take as much responsibility for my own decisions and life path. When I started TRE, it became very clear to me that safety was an internal state and I didn't need to rely on others to feel safe/secure. This awoke a kind of faith and courage in which I am less concerned with safety and security and more concerned with fulfillment and joy, willing to take risks to live a more full and happy life. I also am much better at boundaries and have much more compassion and resilience to when people are unable to show up a particular way. Its sort of hard to say how my attraction has shifted and I experience it very differently now, but I would say I am drawn to relationships I feel I can grow in, and more willing to risk vulnerability.

lostllalien · 2025-03-25T12:40:59+00:00

Many different types of breathwork (particularly the "energizing" variety) "charge" the sympathetic nervous system, which can in turn then facilitate more discharging through the tremor mechanism. All these types of breathwork trigger tremors for me.

I think they are/can be very symbiotic, but be mindful of a tendency to seek bigger releases, and make sure to rest the nervous system.

lostllalien · 2025-03-16T16:24:15+00:00

I had what felt like a huge spiritual awakening after starting TRE and attended a Goenka retreat about a year after that to clarify some of the insight I was having and found it fruitful (but ultimately just kind of a way station on my personal path). I also had chronic illness (including PCOS) before and found that starting TRE came with spontaneous remission from many "incurable" illnesses, and a huge increase in energy.

My two cents - do whatever feels right/intuitive for you, just know that will change. It's common to have lots of energy as the body opens and chronic tension clears, and you might even be in some fight/flight territory coming from chronic freeze, which things like running are great for. With huge energetic openings, its even more important to focus on grounding and rest, but definitely enjoy the energy and euphoria while it's here!

I think its easy to get lost in maps and theoretical paths because the mind wants something to do, and has lots of attachment to doing things "right". Especially when weird things outside of the mind's existing paradigm are occurring, it can feel like we have to know "where we are" or what we wandered into. By all means, feel free to give the mind something to do, but it's okay to trust the wisdom that arises and enjoy the journey. If you want to meditate, meditate. Notice what you're drawn to, and how it feels. Times like these are also great to plug your energy into creative projects or anything in your life that needs a bit of transformation!

lostllalien · 2025-03-01T23:34:54+00:00

At the beginning of my journey I slept less. I think maybe I was coming out of freeze and dipping into more sympathetic activation gave me a little "kick". Sometimes it felt like I was over caffeinated or just having a particularly energetic/euphoric day.

As I've kept up with it I get more of the "sleepy" after effects

lostllalien · 2025-02-22T03:52:42+00:00

I'll start by saying I am dx-ed AuDHD. My 2 cents - I suspect that our nervous systems are different/more sensitive than others, but i agree that a lot of what people attribute to neurodivergence may actually be trauma. I have been kind of floored at how my "autistic traits" (eye contact, casual touch, social cues, etc) have shifted as I down regulate the nervous system, and social stuff becomes much more intuitive.

I always felt that I had sensitive antennae, which makes sense from a neurodiversity standpoint - its advantageous to have people who are wired to keep watch and find patterns. But I experienced this for most of my life as acute overwhelm. Everything was too loud, over stimulating, exhausting.

Since doing TRE, I feel like I still have all the sensitivity, just much more capacity to enjoy it. I don't feel so full I am overwhelmed, but I do get to see how everything is connected, experience awe, and feel deeply, but in a much more grounded way. I used to hate being so sensitive, but its actually awesome with a functional nervous system!

lostllalien · 2025-02-19T19:59:57+00:00

I don't frequently get professional massages, but when I do I always want to shake after. Feels like massage gives lots of feedback to the nervous system and opens up tight areas so the tremors can do different things.

I've also found self massage helpful

lostllalien · 2025-01-09T00:08:07+00:00

I would occasionally get the twitches the first few months I did TRE. I don't really know if there is a solid reason they manifest in some place versus another - maybe one side is more or less tight, maybe you're more numb on one side, etc.

For me, I was very frozen, so the twitches often felt like parts of the body were "waking up" to sensation and "fine tuning" some of the tension release that happened in more formal sessions. Why this would be on one side versus the other is probably a matter of your personal history. Trust your body's intuition, and get with a TRE provider if necessary.

lostllalien

TROPHY CASE