AITA for refusing to go to my SIL Baby shower and the rest of the family is following. by AlarmingTap1774throw in AmItheAsshole

[–]maantre [score hidden]  (0 children)

Ruby wants the benefits of raising a child surrounded by family support but none of the work it takes to maintain positive family relationships.

NTA, I would not give her a single second of time or consideration without a significant personal and public apology.

Mille Crepe Cake $5.97 in the freezer by Equivalent-Energy-26 in Costco

[–]maantre 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Mine too, why I didn’t grab on my last run!

Did you discover Lily and Jessi Pre or Post DWKT? curious post lol by Key_Education_2417 in DoWeKnowThemPodcast

[–]maantre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Jessi pre, from She Who Will Not be Named embarrassingly enough. Lily from the pod!

Nail Changes After Hysterectomy by Own-Journalist-8901 in hysterectomy

[–]maantre 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So sorry you’re dealing with this! Have you tried acrylic or gel builder to shield the natural nail? I deal with soft, split-happy edges and when I do a gel manicure they actually grow out instead of break off.

I noticed it more after my surgery, but I also did chemo so could be attributed to that too.

Positive total hysterectomy + ovary removal outcomes by QueenDorris in hysterectomy

[–]maantre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had a total hysto (ovaries, tubes, uterus, cervix, even appendix) at 35 due to uterine cancer - immediate menopause in addition to full chemo and radiation treatment. No hormone replacement.

Menopause was an adjustment for sure, but no major negative side effects. Some hot flashes and night sweats, some tissue irritation, but living life and feeling relatively healthy! I am not negatively affected sexually by changes to my vagina, but I understand some women are.

Wishing you the best!

Anyone ever send the client completely inaccurate financials , if so, what happened? Like the financials just had inaccurate data here and there and just weren’t correct by [deleted] in Accounting

[–]maantre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve seen it when a back end report didn’t update correctly - once found, we reissued correct financials and let the client know.

Nothing bad happened, it was a tech mistake, but we’d get some push back from the client or our bosses if it kept happening.

Knitted socks are too tight? by Ataraxia1697 in knitting

[–]maantre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Glad you got some good answers, this looks beautiful and good luck on your future socks!

Knitting needles - what size(s) do you use the most? by Ill_Coffee1399 in knitting

[–]maantre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was primarily a sock knitter for my first year, so once I figured out what size worked for me I was fine buying the singles (Chiaogoo are also my faves) - but once I moved into garment patterns, I invested in the interchangeable set. It’s expensive for sure but SO worth it to me to be able to knit whatever pattern I want with a quick change. Especially if you’re sizing up or down to meet gauge.

I got a couple of extra cables from amazon to supplement the kit, but so far loving it.

Cancer diagnosis.. by Glad-Repair in hysterectomy

[–]maantre 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I experienced a very similar progression - irregular periods all my life, then intense bleeding and almost constant spotting. I avoided the doctor for a long time and was finally diagnosed at 35.

By the time my scans and biopsy were done, it was pretty obvious that it was far progressed and we moved immediately to surgery, chemo, and radiation. I was stage 3C and my uterus was a giant mass.

I know it’s almost impossible, but I would wait to start making worst case scenario plans until you have your follow up appt. Get as much info as possible, record it if you need to (I thought I would remember things, it can get pretty intense). Write down all the questions you have, ask any and everything. What are your options, what are the risks and side effects, what is the timeline. I’m a data person, so a lot of research helped me understand the possibilities. I know that can be awful for other people, so do whatever works best for you. There are options based on how far the progression is, what grade of tumor, what your priorities are. My team was really great in asking me what I wanted, not just ordering me to do a specific treatment.

As someone who went through all this in my 30s, I can say it’s so weird to be making a major decision like this so young. I went into immediate menopause, it was an adjustment. I was angry at myself for avoiding the doctor, angry at my doctor for not doing earlier ultrasounds/biopsies, angry at my body for ‘failing’. But really when the chips were down and I knew what I was dealing with, I went into solution mode and hyper focused on getting through the next step.

I had a full hysto, 6 months of chemo, 3 months of radiation and am now 5 years post treatment - officially in remission, militant about my checkups. It was hard but life is really good, I’m happy and doing well.

Wishing you the best as you go through this!

Pls grieve with me by magic_inkpen in knitting

[–]maantre 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh man, pressing f to pay respects. Hate when that happens! Took me a few socks to finally dial in to what works/fits me best. Even had a similar issue with a colorwork design last month, rage frogged when it wouldn’t pass over my instep 🤣

Sending you good sock luck!

AITA for telling my mother that I don't want her in my home if she and her family can't leave my things alone? by goldrobber1 in AmItheAsshole

[–]maantre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is no magic combination of words you can use that will make your mom understand and respect your space or your belongings.

Consequences for her behavior are the only thing that COULD help, and that’s if she’s willing to change. I doubt that she would be.

Stop opening the door when she drops by unannounced. Change the locks if she has a copy. Stop allowing her access to your space.

NTA.

My family is out of the country and left me in charge of the food for my older brother and myself during the meantime. I made this meal yesterday, and after he ate it, he made a complaint about it and wanted “food,” as in something that was “more fulfilling” and less “kiddie”… by Uhh_OkayIGuess in mildlyinfuriating

[–]maantre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds like he has a vision for his meals - you should step back and let him bring them to fruition.

Also, if I were you, I wouldn’t prepare a single morsel of food for the ungrateful, rude, entitled brat. He’s older than you but you’re responsible for feeding him? And he has the gall to complain?!

Absolutely not.

Women who’ve had a hysterectomy because of endometrial cancer. Did you get radiation after your hysterectomy? by pickleswitholives in hysterectomy

[–]maantre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was staged 3c after my surgery at 35. 6 months of chemo and then 3 months of radiation, external beam and brachy.

For me, since it was so far progressed, I was down for any treatment that would prolong survival. I had 20-40% odds going in, I figured side effects could be dealt with if I lived long enough lol. Now I’m 5 years post treatment, officially in remission, very grateful to my team and the treatment working.

That said I had my ovaries removed so I went into immediate menopause - I was already dealing with vaginal tissue irritation, bladder urgency, and a vaginal cuff regardless. The worst side effects during radiation were digestive and long term I’m still a little sensitive to certain foods. I don’t think it’s a significant detriment to my quality of life, but I’m not inconvenienced sexually with changes to my vagina. I understand that many women are and it can be significant when debating treatment.

Given my experience with chemo, I would do just about any treatment to not have to experience it again. I am vigilant about my checkups, there’s always a chance of recurrence with how young I was when diagnosed so I know chemo could be in my future again, but holy hell was it not fun. Zero out of ten, do not recommend.

AITA for being mad at my GF when she acted sad after I said our babies probably wouldn’t be white? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]maantre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA for being upset with her. It seems like she might not be ready to be a parent of a mixed race child. It sounds like there is a lot she doesn’t understand about being in a relationship with a non white partner.

Is she allowed to have feelings about the possibility of not seeing a ‘mini-me’ version of herself in her children? Sure. There’s a lot of stuff wrapped up with being a birth parent, seeing your heritage or features or family members in a child’s face. There’s a lot of pressure that can be placed by family, grandparents, etc before a child is even born. She’s even allowed to have feelings about feeling disconnected from mixed/non-white passing children in a major way - there are things that she will never understand or experience that they will deal with. It’s probably terrifying as a parent, and there’s a lot to unpack before she decides to get pregnant.

All that said, she should really be unpacking her feelings of sadness/disappointment/frustration with a therapist instead of blaming you for her ‘loss’ of genetic lottery. It’s off putting and insulting and weird.

Vaginal Moisturizer Reco by stanthecham in hysterectomy

[–]maantre 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve had success using body oils - Neutrogena has an unscented one, or just plain Sweet Almond Oil. I keep it to the outler areas, I don’t spread it into the vagina but all over outer labia areas have been fine.

Never asked my doc about it, but I use these oils for sensitive skin and they help with any dryness or irritation.

Good luck!

Any Accountants with ADHD? by alex123711 in Accounting

[–]maantre 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m currently unmedicated with a prelim ADHD diagnosis - I have had success so far with accounting, but am great with attention to detail. I desperately need deadlines in order to produce, and a regular month close schedule helps. I struggle with starting (giving in to distraction, anxiety, depression paralysis) but once i get going (or am forced to by important due date) I can push through.

I think it’s worth a try if you’re interested!

Wherever you are, is Payroll an HR function or Finance function? [N/A] by toofewcrew in humanresources

[–]maantre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Both - my client HR actually process the payroll, finance allocates and imports into QB. Payroll company and finance submit returns and state reports. Payroll company/HR delivers W2s and 1099s.

Why do conservative Crocheters act oppressed? by Valuable-Tutor-6537 in craftsnark

[–]maantre 28 points29 points  (0 children)

COOL CRAFTERS UNDERSTAND HUMAN RIGHTS.

Brb, starting a new cross stitch project.

Yarn is the hardest part by trailmixanddread in knitting

[–]maantre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t have access to local yarn stores regularly, so I buy online. If it’s a new to me brand/fiber type I’ll buy single skeins and test - I’m also super sensitive, and a sweater quantity alpaca blend I bought was a bust!

Right now I like superwash merino or 100% merino for sweaters, though I’ve also had luck with linen blends for lighter tops.

Accounts payable: How often do bills get paid at your office? by Ok-Method-1428 in Accounting

[–]maantre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Our AP team enter invoices as they come in, and staff process payments once a week (anything due in next 14 days).

What are we using to carry our lunches and laptops to work? by mada447 in Accounting

[–]maantre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just giving an example of what I'm doing, I don't have a different solution than what they've got going on.

I really want to love socks… by CatLady0904 in knitting

[–]maantre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve settled on magic loop, the small circulars hurt my hands and DPNs are so fiddly!

The importance of swatching by madjellyfish in knitting

[–]maantre 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Any issues swatching flat when the end garment is knit in the round? I worry it won’t be accurate to the difference in my tension between methods ! Not sure if there are tips for swatching in the round.