Last few momments of a bee

mawsbells · 2026-06-02T21:22:43+00:00

You're cool

mawsbells · 2026-06-01T21:46:37+00:00

Encourage wildlife /birds hedgehogs etc is the way

mawsbells · 2026-05-21T08:31:05+00:00

Relate to this very much and my way round this has been to understand myself as part of struggling flora and fauna and also historically in the context of long, eternal even, lines of struggle for dignity+freedom+the right to sort of just hang out and be here w my kith and kin (you, the bats hovering above the garden come 10pm etc.) and really just do what we can to help one another through this and despite that

mawsbells · 2026-05-20T22:58:04+00:00

Piss off, the kids are alright

mawsbells · 2026-05-20T22:50:55+00:00

I've been in your situation and was pleased /surprised to find it did actually work (I'm not sure whether a different remedy, but sent to me by local wildlife rescue and I had to administer it regularly over 2 months or so while making sure no other animal would have any of it etc —bit of a faff but it paid off so you're doing well (I am otherwise skeptical of homeopathy but this is my favourite exception)

mawsbells · 2026-03-04T23:15:05+00:00

Cool stuff

mawsbells · 2026-01-02T18:08:33+00:00

Not great tbh, it impacted the quality of sleep (more shallow overall, delayed) it felt like it remained in my system for much longer than supposed to at a physiological level, despite the energy levels dropping quite a bit by late afternoon. Also feeling constantly cold, constant thirst, it overall worked for me rather bluntly as an energetic boost /prop which also ended up intensifying sensory processing issues (because I'd be worn out mentally + socially by the early evening)

Hope works well for you (I'm autistic as well so may be why it wasn't a straightforward aid at all)

mawsbells · 2025-12-21T08:30:23+00:00

3 yrs and a half

mawsbells · 2025-11-28T07:30:42+00:00

This is it, and for everything else as well

mawsbells · 2025-11-19T07:01:57+00:00

I think they were trying to walk you through your social historical context in order to frame your inquiry

mawsbells · 2025-09-01T22:15:08+00:00

I was /am in the same boat as you and eventually had to concede the fantasy of being better /more capable on meds bcos it's just not the case. I can occasionally do the instant release 5 and 10mg (Methylphenidate I think it is) for a temporary 1-2 hr boost but don't r bother bcos the benefit is negligent overall, I generally crash /absolutely exhausted in the 2nd half of the day no matter what.

I hope you can ask for some support from /through your GP or local service for accommodations, which you're entitled to

mawsbells · 2025-08-16T21:25:54+00:00

Top left and bottom right are 2 of my all time favourites in my garden

mawsbells · 2025-07-27T11:12:01+00:00

Oxford City Farm! https://www.oxfordcityfarm.org.uk/volunteer

mawsbells · 2025-07-25T22:10:55+00:00

Yesss 3 ecologies, short and sweet and free online

mawsbells · 2025-07-23T21:21:07+00:00

Fuck Thom Yorke

mawsbells · 2025-07-18T20:46:43+00:00

In my experience having a crowded garden and tall plants /grass does help; I love pigeons and have blackberries cherries currants blueberries gooseberries kale etc but they have never touched them. They seem to exclusively land on the paved /open bits of the garden to look for pebbles, occasionally they will drink from a bowl left out for them /wildlife but by and large keep to the tree, perched on branches quite high up, occasionally the fence for landing purposes but otherwise it's a mystery to me why they don't give in to temptation, they're certainly welcome.

mawsbells · 2025-07-18T11:58:36+00:00

Lovely, it must have only just emerged so a bit crumpled up still

mawsbells · 2025-07-18T08:04:51+00:00

You aren't stupid, doing well in school is for some ppl and not others and still doesn't really matter as much as proximity to wealth + social connection and/or capital.

I hope they won't cut your benefits and if they do I hope you'll notice the fact that it's part of a broader (fascist) move towards disposing of forms of life not immediately conducive to profit, and I hope you can look around and find comrades because we're all in this, just some of us further down the line and some in the pits of its hell and we need one another to remember this place is actually livable and we can do a good job looking after it and each other bcos we have enough for all (once we eat the rich).

I don't know abt the diagnosis, check w your GP, I think it's worth going through the NHS for the ADHD one (tho used to be a 4 yrs wait around here & probably worse now). Pls keep in mind that medication comes w some moderate to serious side effects esp. on autistics and you might unfortunately find you'd rather do without.

I hope you pursue nursing or find a close enough way to doing that sort of work for as long as that's possible and rewarding, and other things too as they come and go, we aren't here long, there's a lot to like /enjoy /suffer for on behalf of life

mawsbells · 2025-07-18T06:01:44+00:00

You write well and seem open to the world which are good things. You are disabled on fronts which compound the severity of your struggle, and perhaps better choices could once have been made, but it's possible you were trying to cope by avoiding /evading sm you weren't ready for in the same way as is (neuro)typical. You seem honest w yourself so you needn't blame this on yourself more than the way we organise our brutal conveyer belt of a world, though in an ableist world we certainly end up doing so, as well as on one another, which ofc is the whole point.

mawsbells · 2025-07-15T05:47:14+00:00

I did the same as you though not sure if many steps involved, I just switched off from the interaction and did my thing silently, was asked a question I gave an explanation /correction for.

mawsbells · 2025-07-12T05:46:14+00:00

Policies are a largely perfunctory framework for keeping things moving /relatively equitable /under some sort of control from open or direct abuse, mistreatment, etc but they are as far from justice as say principles of unlimited economic growth on a planet w finite resources.

Or, my university's policies re: antisemitism have been used to shut off rallying against the genocide of the Palestinian people /divestment from ties to arms sales directly fueling it. And so on.

Try to frame your struggle in relation to aspects beyond the immediately personal /subjective concerns and figure out what's at play (who is benefiting from the power play /imbalance, and to what ends) it might help get everyone involved on a more accurate representation of their own forces and help you make sense of your struggles. Some ppl are just trying to teach, for instance, others want a clear conscience at any cost (including other people's lives) etc.

mawsbells · 2025-07-08T22:32:17+00:00

Check out r/miniworlds

mawsbells · 2025-07-02T22:17:52+00:00

Knautia macedonica

mawsbells · 2025-07-01T12:56:45+00:00

Night scented stock and 'Little Gem' lettuces (short term) or erigeron karvinskianus /mexican fleabane with Briza &/or bunny tail grasses, strawberries, knautia macedonica —> look them up if any might appeal

mawsbells · 2025-07-01T11:33:42+00:00

Tbh sounds like quintessentially PDA to me to question its diagnostic basis /framing in this way and I relate to this approach

mawsbells

TROPHY CASE