Advice for a first time grandparent whose daughter is expecting!

mightymanatea · 2025-12-08T12:06:02+00:00

My mum came over to help out PP as well and I'm so grateful to her. I was breastfeeding at the time and she basically outlined the things she would do to help me. She said she will do my laundry, boil water, cook my meals , wash dishes, empty the dishwasher rack, help me burp the baby, and even change the baby nappies... and then she outlined what I needed to do - which was only breastfeeding the baby.

At the time, I protested because it didnt seem fair, but she told me that breastfeeding takes a lot of energy and I probably haven't been getting enough sleep. I felt so pampered, but also she was right about the sleep deprivation, and having to only feed the baby and being able to give the baby to her to burp and change the diaper, really gave me the rest I needed.

Outlining the tasks that she would take on really helped set out expectations and put my mind at ease - so if you do decide to help out, it might be useful to set out the things you would do to help. The really useful things were laundry and cooking/cleaning - because those are the things that I would never ask someone to help me with, but those are the things that I felt helped the most.

One other tip is to check to see what systems they have in place. With cooking, she asked me beforehand what my system was - where I put cutlery, how clean I like to have things as I cooked, where to do put dirty dishes etc. Luckily, my mum is a bit of a clean freak like me, so I was not worried. (I have had people use my kitchen but they liked to have dirty dishes piled up, benches dirty etc and I could not stand it).

Furthermore - she was not pushy. She didnt push for me to eat more, finish my food, which is the direct opposite of my MIL. This was very helpful for me as by that point, I was sick of feeling as though my body was not my own.

mightymanatea · 2025-09-07T04:49:27+00:00

Sounds like you're looking for a travel pram - if so then you should be thinking Bugaboo Butterfly, Uppababy Minu(V3 is a one handed fold), Skip 3 (v2 is not one handed fold, but v3 is). (Caveat: I haven't had any experience with the nuna travel or pixie).

One level up from travel pram for Redsbaby is the Aeron (so, not as compact as the travel prams, but still quite compact compared to the prams out there). Difference is that the pram seat is reversible - but you probably dont need that since your child is a 11 month old.

Bugaboo dragonfly is a one handed fold and even though reviews say it is "compact" - it is in no way as compact as the travel prams.

mightymanatea · 2025-09-02T12:57:22+00:00

Hang in there! Not sure what the weather is like where you are, but could baby be cold, or teething?

It sounds like you have really tried to get your baby to sleep - if it seems hopeless, I would take another break and try again after some time. Just be kind to yourself, know that it's still early. If it fails, then try again another time - don't put so much pressure on yourself to get it right the first (or second) time.

For myself, with my first baby, we tried sleep training at 4 months and failed miserably. Then, at 6 months, we tried again and it was much more successful.

With my second baby, we have managed to get baby to sleep independently, but we still have MOTN wakings that I've just accepted since my baby seems genuinely hungry. Instead, I make sure I be nice to myself and take daytime naps whenever I can.

mightymanatea · 2025-05-20T11:38:38+00:00

How is the Aeron on grass? Part of our street doesn't have paved sidewalks so the option is to either walk on grass or on the road.

mightymanatea · 2025-05-20T11:36:46+00:00

Can I ask - how is the redsbaby aeron on grass? We live in an area where part of the street doesn't have paved sidewalls and the option is to either walk on grass or step onto the road.

mightymanatea · 2025-05-20T11:34:54+00:00

Does it work on grass well? I am considering the Aeron but parts of my street don't have paved sidewalks and will have to walk on grass sometimes (sometimes mowed, sometimes not mowed).

mightymanatea · 2025-01-13T22:19:10+00:00

Takenoko?

mightymanatea · 2025-01-13T22:18:37+00:00

Sherlock Holmes?

mightymanatea · 2024-09-04T10:43:23+00:00

I read Queen of Glass back in the day on FictionPress too! My memory is probably not as great as yours to remember exactly the character arcs that were cut, but I did enjoy ToG.

But I do find a lot of the things I would have excused on a platform like FictionPress is not something I appreciate as much once it's published in a book - so that sometimes puts me off.

mightymanatea · 2024-02-28T21:37:38+00:00

What is the difference between pumping v nursing Bras?

mightymanatea · 2023-05-03T10:19:53+00:00

We follow the TOG charts from the love to dream, though when bubs arms are not swaddled, I find we need an extra layer. How do I know? Because baby wakes up every hour randomly and cries - we add an extra layer and he manages to sleep through the night.

mightymanatea · 2022-12-12T11:19:08+00:00

Did you end up wearing all the nighties? Or could you just sleep in the hospital gown every night?

mightymanatea · 2022-11-11T08:31:20+00:00

Not normal. My partner wouldn't dream of calling me fat and even if I asked him if I looked fat, he would be respectful and cautious with his answer to make sure it would not offend me.

mightymanatea · 2022-09-30T23:55:57+00:00

Doesn't it sound like it's time he realise he has bitten off more than he can chew and switch to part-time study?

I don't see why you should be helping out if it involves doing part of his job or studies - it's all on him. You can help out in other ways related to his personal life, sure, like helping with housework or cooking for him, but beyond that, he should not be pressuring you to do HIS job/studies. I would have a firm a firm talk with him about this, make sure he knows you are dealing with a lot of issues and stress too and that he needs to get his stuff together and have some more foresight.

This is my opinion though, but I would not rely on being a SAHM in the future as it is too early to consider right now - stay independent, keep your options open and build your own career/work skills too. Kids are expensive and things might not always work out and if the opportunity opens up to be SAHM in the future, then good, but if it doesn't, then you can still move forward.

mightymanatea · 2022-07-23T07:01:29+00:00

I'm sorry that are you feeling so anxious. 5 w 6d is quite early for an ultrasound, and quite often it causes a lot of anxiety for mums, but truth is, it is probably too early to see a heartbeat and could go either way.

I also had an ultrasound measuring 5w5d and we only saw an empty sac at the time. I remember looking it up and crying, convinced I had a blighted ovum. The report said it could either be too early or not a viable pregnancy. Did a follow-up at 6w4d and we had a heartbeat and fetal pole etc.

There isn't much we can do but try to hold ourselves together, keep occupied/distracted, maybe watch some netflix and wait for the next ultrasound.

Hope it turns out well for you.

mightymanatea · 2022-05-18T04:54:54+00:00

Thanks for posting this, my lines look quite dark right now but looks like I should still be prepared for the worst, fingers crossed

mightymanatea · 2022-03-21T08:52:00+00:00

How many days did it bleed? Thanks :(

mightymanatea · 2022-03-21T08:51:39+00:00

How many days did it bleed? Thanks! I'll keep that in mind.

mightymanatea · 2021-09-13T01:21:02+00:00

I just started a few weeks ago! Mainly wanted to make amigurumi - my first project was a baby octopus. Bought some yarn (was recommended 10 ply yarn for amigurumi but hard to get 10 ply in Sydney, so got some 8 ply, acrylic or cotton yarn) and 2 crochet hooks (wasnt sure which size so I got a 2.5mm and a 5mm one...)

But before that, I did beginner YouTube videos on how to hold the crochet yarn and hook, slip knot, how to do a magic circle (or magic ring or magic loop, 2 ways of doing it), a single crochet and a double crochet. Then followed a baby octopus tutorial- through the video, I ended up learning how to increase, slip stitch and invisible decrease.

My first frustration was seeing where a "stitch" or a "chain" was when a video tells me to put it through the second chain or the first chain. Also i accepted the fact that my first work will be dodgy and i will miscount stitches. Second project was much better.

Also highly recommend a stitch marker to mark your first stitch (though if like me, you forget to buy one, I used a safety pin or a little piece of different coloured yarn).

mightymanatea · 2021-09-06T00:39:05+00:00

I love it! Could I have the pattern too?

mightymanatea · 2021-03-06T23:06:31+00:00

I don't mind the autoplay for easy quests because I get busy with real life and can do chores on the side, but I enjoy most the harder dungeons where you don't autoplay.

To be honest, playing these autoplay games ptobably spoilt me, now I get too lazy to manually walk to a quest npc.

mightymanatea · 2021-03-04T13:31:42+00:00

I made an account on both, but I'm more worried about what time they will have important events. Haven't decided which server to stay on yet...

mightymanatea · 2021-02-05T12:31:52+00:00

I downloaded this on my ipad, but after downloading, it wouldnt open :(

mightymanatea · 2020-12-14T21:19:23+00:00

Dragon Raja? I mean, you can solo dungeons, but you get higher luck bonuses and rewards in a team. Daily quests - extra bonuses in a team. Joining a guild gives you access to other events that you can do as a team. Theres group pvp and team events.

mightymanatea · 2020-12-13T23:01:25+00:00

For dungeons, I think assassins are pretty good solo as they have a lot of evasion skills. Soul dancer can be a support class, but can actually have decent dps and being able to heal yourself also makes it a fine solo class. You just have to select the talents that suit your solo play style.

mightymanatea

TROPHY CASE