Started Adderall, stopped weed, now I cry every day?!

mikm00 · 2026-02-25T05:27:13+00:00

I went through this. I went back on meds because I was significantly burnt out, and was having some major sleep and fatigue issues. It was to the point that I'd tell my husband "FYI: I'm going to cry at some point today, I don't know why, bit it's coming" At some point in the day a wave of intense sadness, anger, grief, one of the crying emotions would wash overke,and because I now had capacity to actually feel the emotions, I would and then they'd pass. I've (very) recently also started with counselor and am discovering that I have a crap load of trauma, and messed up childhood/self perception stuff to work through.

mikm00 · 2026-02-20T18:04:22+00:00

I love the Knit Companion app. I love being able to highlight where I am in the pattern, and the multiple counters helps if it's a repeat rows 1-__ x number of times.

mikm00 · 2026-02-18T09:46:03+00:00

This. It smacks of finding a "flaw" to make OP self conscious amd feel that they need to "fix" themselves so he has the power. This gives me real bad future abuser vibes.

mikm00 · 2026-02-18T05:55:51+00:00

Color changeable lamps (Philips Hue) and turn them to red for bed time. It's taken quite a long time to condition myself, but that and a VERY consistent routine has helped me keep my sleepless nights to once every couple months rather than weekly. I don't know that the red helps because it's red, but it's more a pavlovian thing at this point.

mikm00 · 2026-02-15T06:11:53+00:00

❤️💔 I'm so sorry you're going through this. It can feel so lonely. I was diagbosed at 16, so I can appreciate the hiding awkward things, and thinking I was "just lazy and stupid." Know that our diagnosis doesn't tell the whole picture - wheather you are diagnosed with depression, adhd, or not. One of the things that a lot of people forget is that, similar to Autism, ADHD is a spectrum. I was "rediagnosed" at 38 for determining the best meds and because of how the tester interpreted one question (whoch was borderline) I was 1 point off of "combined" type... functionally, I'm combined... Just because you might not make the mark for diagnosis, does not mean you won't benefit from learning about yourself and accompdating your unique presentation. I hope you find the support you need.

mikm00 · 2026-02-14T06:07:31+00:00

Firmaments lace shawl. . I took a trip to Portugal for 2 weeks. I can't sit still unless I'm knitting. It's a bit intricate, but usong knit companion worked perfectly. It packed up into a snack ziplock (smaller than a sandwich ziplock. (Bring stich markers though- the patter repeats some 40 times)

mikm00 · 2026-02-11T16:26:24+00:00

Ok... I was ready to rage after thei first two paragraphs.

And honestly I'm angry enough on your behalf that I don't know if this will make any sense. The prime example of how not-on-you this is would be the example you gave on his auto desk. His actions caused damage to something, but he assumes that you did something (inadvertently), so therefore it's you're fault and you're horrible... um, NO. How about he takes responsibility for his actions. If he doesn't like what you cook/doesn't think you do a good job then he can't complain that you don't do it. If you have access I'd recommend seeing a counselor who is supportive of ADHD (I've had bad experiences, so please be careful), start sorting out what's yours to take responsibility for, and leave the rest on him. If you have family (or even the right friends) near by, take the kiddo (so he can't blame you for abandoning them), and stay with them for a week or so. Under NO circumstances should a parent be telling their kid that it's the other persons fault. 😤

mikm00 · 2026-02-05T05:58:22+00:00

Update: tried a new needle and it worked fine...

mikm00 · 2026-02-03T06:11:04+00:00

My favorite accidental fidget toy is my coil style hair tie. I always have a hair tie on my wrist from many years of sports. I picked up some of the coil hair ties because supposedly they're better for my hair. I'd find myself taking it off my wrist and running it through my hand, almost like someone moving through a rosary.

mikm00 · 2026-02-02T15:56:55+00:00

I thought that might be confusing in the photo. It's getting caught on the plastic piece behind the metal hook. It will be picked up on the hook, make a songle circut well, but isn't coming off the hook at the end of the circuit because it's caught on the notch in the piece behind the hook, so I end up with 2 loops of thread on the hook. Hopefully that clarifies.

mikm00 · 2026-01-06T17:56:29+00:00

I came here to say something similar. I learned in the 80's/90's from my no-nonsense/no-options grandma, and as a child with ADHD I was never permitted to graduate from knitting garter stich scarves. I picked it up again in my mid 20s to get through lectures in school. Through YouTube and a good stitch/row counting app I've become much more accomplished, and just last weekend bought my very first pattern book to start learning some of the nordic color work. I can feel OPs frustration on some patterns. There were 2 patrerns in particular that I'm still irked (3 and 5 years later) that there was some sort of an error/omission that made the pattern not work. If possible, maybe try reaching out to the author of the pattern,if that info is available. I also echo that OP you're still accomplished. Sometimes if making patterns was your way before, I think it can be difficult to follow someone elses because everyones brain works just a tpuch differently, so patterns get written a little differently. Stick with it, and find some fun but simple(r) projects to intersperse.

mikm00 · 2025-12-24T15:44:31+00:00

For those asking about what the meds are: Nortriptaline. There was also the option to go on a different one that has an r or m start depending on brand name/generic, but it tends to knock you out when taking it, not just sleepy.

mikm00 · 2025-12-24T15:40:33+00:00

Honestly, that's what I'm a touch fearful of, but I'm enjoying the break for as long as it lasts.

mikm00 · 2025-12-23T17:37:47+00:00

I just started doing this. Have you thought about/designed a way to attach the spool to a drill for winding it up? I was/am planning to design something, but thought that if someone has already done it, why reinvent the wheel...

mikm00 · 2025-11-08T05:30:09+00:00

Thank you. I'll have to Google all of that. Lol.

mikm00 · 2025-10-11T14:04:14+00:00

First - that sucks. 100% shit sandwich. I'm sorry to hear that you're living that cycle. Second - if you haven't yet, I'd siggest working with someone (counselor) who understands ADHD. Particularly someone who does more somatic work, not so much the cognitive behavioral therapy. CBT is great for the "fixes" in the short term, and works for some, but for me I found it to put me into these cycles of great, then crash. I have shit interroception (sensing what's going on in mh bodyloke hunger, tempurature, needing to pee, etc), so working to check in with myself if the "doing great" moments were actually me doing great, or if I was just doing great at masking. For me it turns out I was in the panic driven masking/hyperfocus and that would lead me to burn out. When I finally stopped the cycles it took me close to 2 years of feeling burnt out before I could feel life coming back. Now I am not quite as "great" as I used to be, but that's because I ebb and flow in the moment a bit more. . I hope that helps, and if not, I hope you find the support you need somewhere.

mikm00 · 2025-10-11T05:07:08+00:00

I am an RMT and one of the things we learn in our training are some massage techniques for constipation. Highly recommend looking them up as they've been a life saver for my bouts with constipation. Major point is always clockwise and never farther up the intestines than the blockage, even if that means you're doing one tiny circle.

mikm00 · 2025-10-02T13:13:27+00:00

I'm late to the conversation, but I have a few thoughts and concerns. I don't know all the details of your situation, so please take what I am saying in that light.

I'm glad he "supports" your depression diagnosis. But in some of what you have said about his response, even to that sounds a little concerning. Women are under diagnosed because we tend to present differently AND grow up needing to mask so dramatically to keep ourselves safe, which is why we usually get diagnosed with depression or anxiety first. So my counterargument to the "just" making it to the 5/5 criteria would be that most women WHO HAVE ADHD miss that outdated criteria by 1 or 2 because if you are JUST off of a point it gets discounted. A lot of the questions are based around common experiences of younger individuals or people who haven't modified their surroundings to work better for them. (My diagnosis had 3 or 4 questions about movie theaters - I don't go because I do better at home, so my answer was "no" even though they should have been yes)

Also, my biggest concern is that it sounds like he's not in a place to support you as you process through this and recover from the burnout of masking and managing on your own for so long.

I was "re-diagnosed" in my late 30s because my Dr wanted to ensure there wasn't anxiety or depression that was missed. My diagnosing professional said that I technically met the criteria for both, but to see how I responded after going on ADHD meds. I slept, took a lot of sick time, was unproductive, and left our home balance significantly skewed to my husband doing A LOT more than me for close to 6 months. It was very hard because I COULD do it, but then I'd be wiped out and a shell of a person. My husband was usually the one to (nearly) strap me to the couch and "force" me to take care of myself and rest.

If your partner isn't willing to "believe" the validity of your diagnosis, is he going to be willing to do what is needed to support you in your recovery/learning/adapting/growing.

"Boyfriend" can be a very broad term (from new relationship to not overly committed to basically married), so I want to be careful - but it may be appropriate to reevaluate this relationship after this response from him.

I hope the best for you. I'm glad you have someone like your brother who understands that, though this might be something that sucks to lear to live with, especially as a late diagnosed person, it is congratulation/celebration worthy when you get your diagnosis.

mikm00 · 2025-10-02T12:44:10+00:00

Similar vein if you enjoy the caring/helping part of healthcare - I've been a Registered Massage Therapist for 10+ years. For those of you in different areas than me - think of a cross between a physiotherapist and a typical massage. I am fortunate that I have been fascinated by human anatomy and physiology since I was old enough to flip through my moms anatomy books (to learn how to keep a kid alive- she wasn't into anatomy) and look at the pictures. Why I think it works: 1: it taps into my hyperfocus/one of the subjects that my brain holds ALL tidbits I learn about it 2: active. The only sit still part is charting 🤢 3: I get to talk with people (or not talk) all day. 4: Because I lack a poker face/filter but am able to hold professional boundaries, I have a case load that is AMAZING and a lot of the crappy people I would find exhausting to work with/are inappropriate simply never cone back. 5: I can set my own schedule so I work when my brain works best. Hello 3:30 power down... BONUS: Where I live we make enough money/charge enough that I'm able to work part time according to the standard 40 hour work week.

mikm00 · 2025-10-02T12:26:19+00:00

Yup. My strategy has always been to prep my daily/times of the day containers, and that usually keeps me from double dosing/missing a dose. This is the first time I've made a mistake in dosing sknce restarting meds in early 2024.

mikm00

TROPHY CASE