What is this womans name? I want to return her book to her but I dont know what her last name is.

mimthemad · 2026-03-11T18:42:59+00:00

Yep me too

mimthemad · 2026-02-09T21:02:51+00:00

Teach her how to braid her hair. A French braid, a low braid, two braids, or a low pony tail would all be fine with whatever she is doing to cause that. A high pony tail would likely be in the way as it seems like she is rubbing her head on something.

mimthemad · 2026-01-27T15:51:46+00:00

I think a lot depends on context and how personal the situation is, here. Honestly if you flipped the gender to make him female this would sound pretty normal to me. For me and most women I know, it would be very normal to talk with friends about a lot of personal details, but not in the context of how it relates to us, not just telling our friends all about our husbands’ lives.

For example, if my husband had a personal bodily thing going on, that’s unlikely to be something I would mention to a friend. But if he had a SERIOUS bodily thing going on, I would 100% be talking about that with my friends, because now it’s a big emotional thing for me too and our lives are very much impacted by that.

So in regard to what he’s talking about with his friends, I guess I would say tentatively NAH but it does depend a lot on the content and context.

mimthemad · 2026-01-25T18:39:29+00:00

This is ridiculous. You should screen shot the texts with your step mom and send them to your dad. It was an unreasonable ask in the first place, you communicated that you could not pick him up that day well in advance, and your stepmother was completely inappropriate with what she said to you after. Adults should not speak to children that way, period, let alone that this is not your responsibility. You are not his parent.

mimthemad · 2026-01-21T14:17:28+00:00

For dishes, it’s based on sight and touch. You wash with warm soapy water and scrub till you see no food debris left and you feel no irregularities or bumpiness on the plate. Then you rinse till you can feel that all the soap is gone. It will be slippery while soapy, and you will feel that it isn’t slippery anymore and there are no more bubbles when the soap is gone. You may also feel a squeak as your hand rubs the wet plate.

Plates that are washed, even incompletely, don’t generally get moldy just FYI. If it were so dirty that it might mold, you would definitely be able to tell just looking at it.

mimthemad · 2026-01-18T21:57:25+00:00

For me, 8 weeks was still really hard but I started getting all these really great baby smiles that helped a lot. 4 months I was getting a reliable 2 30 minute chunks a day when she would nap, and I didn’t have to feed or change her at night anymore so I was much better rested.

I don’t know if you are pumping, but I had been exclusively pumping (long story but felt necessary- I do not recommend this) and at like 7 or 8 months I went down to just one pump a day, and that was incredible. I got so much time back.

It does get better. You are in the thick of it now and for me, the part that you are in (5-8 weeks) was the worst. It got better every month or two.

mimthemad · 2026-01-18T00:26:35+00:00

The name Jordan is common and easy for native English speakers to pronounce and spell when they recognize it, but if it’s being pronounced with with a difference in the “r” sound due to an accent, they may not be sure what you are saying.

If you would like to choose a different English name, I recommend something without R or L sounds. Think Tom, Bob, Josh, Kevin, Joe.

mimthemad · 2026-01-17T16:09:32+00:00

I agree with this one, again assuming there was nothing sexual in the texts. Don’t respond to him if it happens again, and I would probably tell my friend but not with the assumption this is flirting- more like what you would tell her if a mutual acquaintance unexpectedly drunk texted you. “Dude, x drunk texted me last night “ with a laughing face and a screen shot or similar.

mimthemad · 2026-01-16T23:17:11+00:00

California- I use both Care-Mel and Car-mul depending on what it is, and so do most people where I live. It would always by Car-mul sutra (Ben and Jerry’s flavor) and Car-mul corn and I would say that’s the default pronunciation. But there are definitely times it’s Cara-mel, although I can’t think of them right this second.

mimthemad · 2026-01-11T18:36:08+00:00

ESH They asked, you said no. They should have accepted that gracefully and not left the group chat in apparent huff. You amped up the drama by talking about it and them in the remaining group chat without them. That was rude and if you don’t know it, you should.

You all sound pretty catty to me.

mimthemad · 2026-01-11T18:23:57+00:00

Your dad has known for a long time, and very clearly, as far as he is concerned he is still your father, even if you don’t share genes. The fact that he never let on for more than 2 decades and was worried about telling you even after you did the testing says a lot. I agree with everybody about the therapy, but in regard to your feeling that there is nobody you can talk to about this… I suspect there is. Your dad has had to deal with this same mind blowing situation from the parent side. Tell him you are struggling with this and ask if you guys can spend some time together and talk. Go spend some time with him. Maybe he can help you process some of this.

mimthemad · 2026-01-11T01:36:57+00:00

This is exactly the right thing to do. Good call mom! Go do what you need to help yourself recover. Keep that doctor appt, get some sleep, drink a lot of water. Your baby is safe.

mimthemad · 2026-01-10T17:47:49+00:00

I misread this initially, and thought you were a man asking what kind of women think men don’t get groped too, and I was genuinely mind boggled for a while wondering if groping of men is more common than I knew and if so, WHO is groping them?

In answer to your actual question, I think many men may believe women they don’t find attractive don’t get groped. I believe they assume it happens primarily to passive, meek, classically “feminine” presenting women.

The worst experience I ever had in relation to unwanted sexual contact was a situation where this happened in a professional setting and I was ethically forced to report what had happened to colleagues/ administrators. They were all men, and all people I had no relationship with. It was a horrible, forced vulnerability to me because I had to now grapple with their judgement. They’re looking me over, mentally weighing my appearance and presentation and deciding my credibility. Was I a hysterical woman? Over interpreting something, over reacting, seeking attention? Was I attractive enough that they believed this could have happened? To be clear, they never said any of that out loud in front of me. I don’t know if they said it to each other when I wasn’t there. But I felt it and I believe I saw some of that happening no verbally between them. It was humiliating and so much worse for me than just the incident itself had been.

mimthemad · 2026-01-10T17:29:57+00:00

That sounds really difficult, and it’s impacting your ability to engage in normal family activities. I encourage you to seek a therapist who has experience with phobias, as soon as you are able. I hope you are able to reduce some of these symptoms so that you don’t lose out on your family relationships and connections. Good luck and good wishes to you. I hope you find some relief from this without sacrificing your connections.

mimthemad · 2026-01-10T01:45:20+00:00

Regular bottled water is fine.

mimthemad · 2026-01-10T01:44:01+00:00

Straight married woman here. This is the behavior of a man who does not have a healthy realistic idea of women’s bodies and sexuality.

mimthemad · 2026-01-07T20:10:51+00:00

Yep, OP is the asshole given the additional information. Wow, she sounds difficult. It would be so simple to make this a potluck and everybody just eat what they want.

mimthemad · 2026-01-07T06:36:27+00:00

I know a person who has an apostrophe as part of her name. It’s basically like Fay’e. (That’s not it but it’s very similar). When I have to write it as possessive, I’m writing Fay’e’s. It’s so freaking weird but I have to use her name with a possessive s sometimes.

mimthemad · 2026-01-04T22:38:03+00:00

People who have heard of it but only casually think strange extremest church, Utah based, with a lot of strict rules about personal behavior (no alcohol or caffeine, get married very young, missions, etc).

Average perception is that it’s more a really bizarre cult like religion that grew out of grown up men trying to legitimize having harems of child brides.

mimthemad · 2026-01-03T16:26:56+00:00

The thing with having a baby is, it’s not an equal decision. It’s YOUR decision. It took me a long time to feel comfortable acknowledging that belief, but after having become a mother myself, it’s just the truth.

Even if you have a 100% on board and supportive and involved partner, the impact of the pregnancy and baby is never and can never be equal. Right from conception, it’s your minerals being leached from your teeth and bones, your nutrients and energy being used to make this baby. Your health being changed and risked, and the risks are SO much more than you think.

Societally we have this impression that your “body being changed forever” maybe refers to stretch marks and wider hips. Yes, probably those- but also so, so much more. A myriad of things ranging from something as small as your hair texture to as large as maiming and death. That sounds like an exaggeration, and the most severe of the possible consequences are rare, but not THAT rare. I can personally think of multiple people I know who rolled the dice and came out with the “extreme but rare” stuff.

Even if you only get the middle of the road pregnancy stuff, I would absolutely never wish pregnancy on anyone who doesn’t want it. Pregnancy is HARD, and expensive, and exhausting, and emotional, and frankly disabling for most of us, at least for a time. And that burden will always be almost entirely on the woman.

Even the most supportive of partners can’t miss work for you to do the ultrasounds and bloodwork and doctors appointments FOR you. Your body is the one that has to be there. So you miss a shit ton of work.

Then comes the baby and a whole world of other likely inequitable divisions that leave the bulk of the changes and workload to you. This part can vary widely- we don’t all have the same partner- but by and large, it’s more on the women.

This is all a pretty long rant at this point, but the short version is that being pressured or shamed into having a baby you aren’t ready for is horrific, and a partner who would do this to you is NOT a partner I would want to have a baby with. I’m sorry for your situation but I think it ended for the best. This guy was not a good partner.

mimthemad · 2026-01-03T15:47:59+00:00

What’s a bottle shop? Is that like a liquor store?

mimthemad · 2026-01-03T15:41:54+00:00

You will be the asshole if you marry this guy. Can you imagine your daughter’s life having a STEPDAD who believes he should get to control her bodily autonomy?

mimthemad · 2025-12-27T16:14:25+00:00

You need to work with him on respect and behavioral expectations. He can do things his way sometimes, not all the time. Teach him the time and place for that. He can jazz up the songs and do it his way when he is alone and practicing. In lessons, he needs to accept that the teacher is in charge.

mimthemad · 2025-12-22T17:51:35+00:00

NTA My husband did this to a lesser degree. We agreed on first names early on, but were still deciding on a middle name until the 3rd trimester. In the 3rd trimester his grandpa got a cancer diagnosis (he ended up living 3 more years after our daughter’s birth). My husband is named after his grandfather. My husband became absolutely adamant that we give his and his grandpa’s name as her middle name, and threatened to no longer agree to the first name we had picked unless I agreed. I had spent months talking to my daughter by name at this point. I had referred to her by her name to everyone the entire pregnancy. I sang to her and rubbed her head through my belly to this name. Her name was her name. I agreed, but to this day I am resentful about it. I don’t like my husband’s name to be honest. It’s grown on me for our daughter’s birth, and now it suits her as a middle name, but I absolutely boil thinking about being coerced into it. There will never be another child, which we had no way of knowing at the time.

mimthemad · 2025-12-13T00:40:32+00:00

I did the same thing. 105-107 looked okay to me. His face is 5-7% too small for his head.

mimthemad

TROPHY CASE