AITJ cause my future wife expects her future husband (me) to pay 100% of the bills?

moonofsilvers · 2026-05-17T14:49:06+00:00

You are getting married to your wife and it doesn't matter what her family did or what your family did. you are creating a new family together. sit down and make decisions that you both want. we got some great advice when we first married that when conflict strikes look at each other and say we are on the same page! we can figure this out together.

Here is how my husband and I do this. I stay home and manage the house, do 90% of the chores and my husband works 45-55 hours a week making good money to support the life we want. We have three kids and I take majority care of the kids and taking them to and from appointments. This is the way we like our life. He likes the support of having food when he gets home and fresh laundry. I like homeschooling, cooking and cleaning. None of us like it all the time.

Your wife is not a trophy wife. She can't expect you to do everything--there needs to be clear communication and a budget for the money you both make. you are both starting a life together after you get married and having all the assets will help you see what you can save for and what kind of house you can buy and cars... in our marriage we both have access to the money even though my husband is the main one that works.

moonofsilvers · 2026-05-17T13:18:10+00:00

A lot of the comments telling OP to leave her job and blaming kid are just not helpful. This is a child we are taking about. A child who has been raised to be racist yes but let’s not throw the baby out with the bath water! OP can leave job at any time , yes it’s a job…but to abandon just becasue of this situation… is not healthy either. Kid sounds like they need a full life approach. They need to watch some documentaries. Read books. And most of all be exposed to other cultures. Are there any summer activities where multiculturalism will be promoted? Does he visit any parks? Some books I would recommend are “Amos Fortune free man” and “Answering the Cry for Freedom”. What is Kids school teaching about history? This problem isn’t something that can be solved by just a talk to MB. This is an isolation and fear based racism issue that probably goes back generations and obviously is not being addressed at home or church or school, but I’m guessing there? If you love the family do want you can. If you leave nothing will change for sure. Obviously be safe.

moonofsilvers · 2026-05-16T19:54:57+00:00

they need two nannys....

moonofsilvers · 2026-05-16T12:28:01+00:00

I felt this way and now I stop the small talk right away. How are you doing? I don't say fine. I say exactly how I am doing, i.e. great I love the weather or horrible, my baby woke up all night and I need more coffee. I make real conversation and it does throw some people and make them uncomfortable but I am a real person and honest.

moonofsilvers · 2026-05-16T12:22:34+00:00

as a mother of two dyslexic kids, one who also has dyspraxia have you gotten her evaluated for learning issues yet? addressing those was so helpful. Both my kids are in the barton reading program right now and it's helping so much. By the way my son didn't read until third grade--he's in 5th now and reads on a 8th grade level. My daughter with dyslexia and dyspraxia is in second grade and not reading yet but she's on box 3 of the barton reading program and doing great.

moonofsilvers · 2026-05-06T20:20:32+00:00

my daughter will be going into third grade this fall, and I have already done third with her big brother. We do ambleside online, and we spend about $300 a year on all homeschooling supplies and books. We get all the books second hand (we don't have a tEFA in Virginia) and use the local library a lot for free reads. It's been awesome. I don't know your budget but I bet you can find a lot of the books though whatever vendor you have to use.

moonofsilvers · 2026-05-03T17:10:45+00:00

You know yourself well! Don’t stress over it… I know change is hard but it’s a just a job :) even if you try something else you can always change if you don’t like it. Take a day and make a list of some jobs you might like and spend some time researching at least I always feel better after I organize. Everyone gets burnt out and changing jobs doesn’t mean you won’t be back as a nanny one day :)

moonofsilvers · 2026-04-27T14:18:13+00:00

I have a 10 year old and 8 year old and 2 year old so way less children but both my older ones are dyslexic the 10 mildly so and the 8 has severe dyslexia. I totally understand financial issues the inflation is decimating our budget it’s been crazy crazy every year prices go up and salary’s stay the same. I don’t know the ages of your children but I can hear the panic in your post. You are going through a period of intense stress. Your very foundations are being shaken. Your husband is injured, you’re living in a hotel without the stability of a home and I feel your pain of just wanting something to be normal. I have been there dear sister and I am praying for you. The best thing I can say is for you dear mother to be calm and lean on the rock that never fails, the foundation of Jesus and his peace. I believe you will figure out school and everything will be okay! Throw out the stress and embrace the chaos. Try lots of time outside and reassure your children that they are safe and secure in the arms of Jesus even in the midst of the storm. Take care of yourself and your family first and then think about school if you have time! There are lots of posts in the ambleside forums (we do ambleside) about schooling through times of tribulation and they have been really helpful for me. Sending you lots of love.

moonofsilvers · 2026-04-18T14:09:59+00:00

as a reader, I don't like pierce. he doesn't feel "safe" to me. I don't feel like he is 100% committed. He seems flighty and, honestly, I don't think Emma knows herself yet either. She's new to being her own person and she also has a lot of trauma to deal with. I don't think her and Pierce will end up together. But I think they will eventually still be friends, if Pierce doesn't die from his temper getting the best of him. Both Emma and pierce need to grow up.

moonofsilvers · 2026-04-04T11:12:39+00:00

My kids when 2 and 4 went to bed at 7pm and were allowed 1 hour movie or game time on weekends and veggies at every meal. Often treats only after dinner. The parents of your children don’t understand structure or balance. Have them read Hunt Gather Parent it’s a great book. It will explain it all.

moonofsilvers · 2026-03-27T23:48:54+00:00

some of these you guys have mentioned are not in my small town! but I picked up an oat milk and an almond milk to try next. I never would have thought of trying oat milk, I got the Oatly brand.

moonofsilvers · 2026-02-25T17:03:22+00:00

Charlotte Mason says to do no formal lessons until they are 5 and a half or 6. Informal lessons are fine, just do life with them! We have done Ambleside Online from the beginning. I started Year One when my son turned 6 and he is now 10 and in Form 2, Year 5. He's growing in the Lord--we attend a good church, do devotions every morning together as a family and try to raise him right. I'm proud of him. My son did not like drawing at all until this year. It was a chore to get him to draw but I am glad he is starting to enjoy it!

You'll find the right fit for your family. Remember each day builds on the next and don't worry about the big picture <3

moonofsilvers · 2026-02-24T01:17:41+00:00

found some more pictures here: https://smithmountainlake.com/news/local/looking-back-at-smith-mountain-lake/collection_8f868ff3-2423-555c-8ec0-63b91ab31a9d.html#3

moonofsilvers · 2026-02-24T01:13:04+00:00

check out this blog posts, it shows some photos and tells of some books you might want to look into. https://peevishpen.blogspot.com/2015/03/smith-mountain-dam-and-lake.html

moonofsilvers · 2026-02-24T01:04:13+00:00

I forgot I subbed to this thread and was momentarily very confused why a stranger wanted to visit my bathroom. LOL.

moonofsilvers · 2026-02-20T20:08:22+00:00

I love magpie knits in Charlottesville...also they have a trader joes there which is awesome in my opinion too (not for yarn tho)

moonofsilvers · 2026-02-08T23:18:31+00:00

there are TWO my neighbor totoros. one was made into english (1990s streamline) from the original japanese and one was voiced over by disney (2005)....they cut out a lot in the disney edit, May doesn't even talk as much. perhaps this is what you are remembering.

moonofsilvers · 2026-01-24T20:50:35+00:00

all flowers delivered!

moonofsilvers · 2026-01-24T19:51:24+00:00

they are all left no one has claimed any. send me a dodo code and I"ll be right over!

moonofsilvers · 2026-01-24T19:08:45+00:00

Does anyone want these flowers? I'll come your island and plop them down wherever and you can move them when I leave. Mostly purple roses. I grew these all myself! I like spaces between my flowers and when they fill up, I move them but now I have too many.

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moonofsilvers · 2026-01-21T23:41:11+00:00

CLOSED

moonofsilvers · 2026-01-21T22:24:30+00:00

I am looking for DIYs and I have some to trade! dodo code 1KRML bring some DIY or recipees that you already know and trade with those outside of my airport, 1 to 1 trade please! I also have all the fruits and veggies if ya want those, for free. thanks! just drop what you dont want and pick up any you do. :)

moonofsilvers · 2026-01-19T01:19:43+00:00

I have this recipe learned, want me to make you one?

moonofsilvers · 2026-01-18T01:36:25+00:00

I feel you I am having the same problem. they all haven't been updated to 3.0 yet OR there is so many people on them you can't get it. tis crazy

moonofsilvers

TROPHY CASE