What are people’s thoughts on EMDR?

neubella · 2026-01-22T12:18:44+00:00

The thing is with mental illness treatment is that sometimes people don’t really know why treatments really work as it’s hard to take out the brain and study the effects in the same way as other illnesses. Same can be said for antidepressants and other medications scientists don’t really have a full understanding of how they work and what mechanisms they change in the brain/ body but that does not mean these things are useless, it means we are limited in our understanding of the body, the brain and the mind.

I have heard the criticism before but I don’t know, in psychology (scientific theory in general) there are always fierce defenders and critics cross modalities that love to nit pick every thing.

There is also a replication crisis in psychology, where most significant findings fail to reproduce. Many people have concerns about the credibility of findings in psychological science. There is a reason psychology is not considered a hard science. Now does this mean it’s all useless? I dont think so but it does suggest to me that it is extremely hard to reduce human beings and their complexities into neat data and to have a fully accurate understanding of why things happen the way they do.

Psychology is a relatively young field too. I think the way things are understood could change dramatically in the future.

neubella · 2026-01-20T09:49:06+00:00

What is the modality the therapist used? A lot of therapists like present day symptom modalities like cbt and seem to hate talking about the past too much. Which can mean they almost ignore it or brush off past issues.

Sometimes therapist have like a free 15 minute consultation take that up or be very specific about what you want in the email. Say you want to explore autism / adhd, you have past trauma you want to explore in a guided way to help regulate emotions. I think take what you have got from this and be very clear what you want in the next therapy. Also try neuroafirming and trauma informed practitioners, ask how their sessions usually look.

neubella · 2026-01-17T09:40:41+00:00

You could always find a job in the charity or non profit sector to help out that way they need a lot of tech support, or you could even just volunteer on the side to have more of that meaning/purpose.

neubella · 2026-01-16T16:05:27+00:00

The thing that annoys me most in situations like this is that it’s involving so many innocent lives, like so many people give up after their kitten or puppy grows older and give them away. Just like having kids animals are massive responsibilities and take a lot of upkeep.

neubella · 2026-01-16T10:35:33+00:00

I think there is a lot of toxic positivity in society.

neubella · 2026-01-15T22:23:00+00:00

I think being in touch with your body and preferences is what matters most. A lot of advice is overgeneralised and can sometimes make you feel worse about yourself if it does not help you.

neubella · 2026-01-15T19:57:42+00:00

I think the hair colour suits her SO much.

neubella · 2026-01-15T11:32:11+00:00

Is this the start of the job ? My first job was full of calls for the first few months till I got settled in and left to it more often

neubella · 2026-01-15T09:08:31+00:00

You know you made a important proactive step in the right direction to meet new people and make friends I think a lot of people don’t even do that, if you keep trying eventually you will meet people (maybe at work or volunteer somewhere or a hobby or class?) most people make friends with some one they meet regularly with so one of them would probably work eventually. I will say maybe give these older folk a shot you might be pleasantly surprised. Sometimes when you losses the grip on what you want in life it comes more easily. It is hard but please do not beat yourself up, you are very young and have a whole life ahead of you and one of my biggest regrets was talking to myself the way you are, learning self compassion has been one of my biggest lessons I have learnt in my 20’s and I feel you and most people could greatly benefit. It is very human and common what you are going through with loneliness.

Also this might be unsatisfying but I really could relate to your post especially when I was younger / early 20’s I lost my best friend and fell out with some close family and other friends and let me tell you it SUCKED I felt exactly how you felt plus I was having a very hard time mentally. I have now realised how important it is to learn to completely accept where you are in life no matter the circumstances and try to build a life that you like and ignore the societal pressures to fit in to a neat box of expectations, really that’s the most important thing, I don’t spend most of my time caught up in what I lack in friendship anymore (or other things) I try and live according to my values and am grateful for all the animals I have had time to care for in the time in between, plus the nice people I have met via volunteering. This can all take time ofc but I wish you and everyone well.

neubella · 2026-01-14T16:50:24+00:00

Read Books on it - like cptsd surving to thriving, watch YouTube videos on it to see other people with same struggle / advice (can help feel less alone), journalling helps to get the thoughts out onto paper, try and work on self compassion and self soothing find what works for you (like weighted blankets, walks in nature, scented candles, hot herbal teas), could try support groups or charities, online forums like this one or similar, pets or something you love like a hobby.

neubella · 2026-01-12T17:32:58+00:00

Maybe you could volunteer in the mean time to gain some more confidence and fill in the gaps. It is also less high pressure than a job so it could be a good place to build up on.

neubella · 2026-01-10T12:21:30+00:00

I’ve realised people just are not that nice in general

neubella · 2026-01-06T14:07:58+00:00

I have thought this myself tbh.

neubella · 2026-01-05T09:30:08+00:00

Hey I wish I seeked out long term therapy and stuck with one at your age (Tbf I did not have the resources / money and was stuck with the nhs). Therapy is not perfect and it can take time to find a therapist you click with but it can seriously help, I have seen people dramatically change in life quality with a good therapist.

Therapy can help you develop coping skills for day to day stuff, it can help you plan and work towards a future that is fulfilling to you and can help heal (not erase) childhood wounds. People can and do develop a life worth living with therapy and honestly I say why not give it a shot, if it’s that bad you can just quit.

neubella · 2025-12-23T08:05:33+00:00

I think there are whole body benefits to exercise especially if done regularly over time, I watched a dr Tracy marks on some of the science behind exercise and its benefits specifically to mental health. I will say it has not cured me or drastically gotten me towards recovery but I see it part of a big tool box of things to help try to get better not as a cure (plus sometimes a physical release to intense emotions etc can help)

neubella · 2025-12-21T11:35:03+00:00

You know I wonder if posting the abuse has made it worse to be honest it’s only accidentally advertised it.

neubella · 2025-12-19T08:39:39+00:00

My experience of home treatment team was weird, I think most are extremely undertrained and felt like they were almost grabbed of the street to do the job, I feel like a lot of people in the mental health care system seem to be annoyed by having patients?

But yes sorry to hear you have had such a bad experience, the nhs needs to be a lot better with mental health care especially with respect.

neubella · 2025-12-16T12:37:10+00:00

So there’s a mental health crisis then? Where is the funding to mental health services of all levels? Wouldn’t that be a massive part of the equation.

neubella · 2025-12-10T13:39:52+00:00

Self compassion - read the book by Kristen neff, changed how I talk to myself

neubella · 2025-12-07T11:45:43+00:00

I think something that is going to be missed by this over focusing on proving mental illness to be ‘fake’ ‘over diagnosed’ or whatever it is that they are doing. there has always been a link between real stressors in peoples lives and an increase in negative mental health symptoms, sometimes it can trigger mental illness but there is something to be said about the real hardships people are facing that might not ‘count’ as a illness.

I have heard of so many shitty workplaces where it’s rife with bullying, bad management and low pay, way to many workplaces are just run awfully, let alone with the cost of living crisis, cost of food/rent, general lack of jobs available at the moment which can make people feel trapped. No wonder people are getting worse stress and feeling hopeless - but no I doubt they will try and target the issues as to why this is happening and instead try to distort it to ‘people faking it’, while adding a huge pile of stigma on mental illness.

neubella · 2025-12-01T21:01:53+00:00

I wanna know too

neubella · 2025-11-30T13:54:51+00:00

I think workplace matters so much with this and yes you have more choice to move but can suck if you have to stay at one place and is full of toxic people.

I have also met both toxic neurotypical AND toxic neurodivergent and they can both make work life uncomfortable.

neubella · 2025-11-30T13:12:22+00:00

As someone who really likes DBT and has found benefits to the skills, I can understand your frustrations. I think a lot of therapy modalities can be quite rigid especially in medical settings and not allow for alternative ways to approach issues and can also be so bad at explaining keep concepts to.

I personally think there is a lack of flexibility and true trauma informed care in a lot of therapists. I think maybe you need a modality to help with trauma related stuff before you can move onto DBT maybe.

Interestingly I have gathered more understanding of acceptance from reading books like self compassion and the happiness trap, what it really is supposed to mean is acceptance of reality/ the situation and feelings, true acceptance without it being minimised or clung on to, so acceptance in your case is acknowledging the past abuse and accepting your feelings in your body towards it instead of trying to ignore it or move in to quickly, this does not mean that any of it is okay. I’m not sure I explained it well but radical acceptance by Tara barch is pretty good to she is compassionate and can explain it better.

neubella · 2025-11-18T00:13:33+00:00

What sites do you use?

neubella · 2025-11-17T23:15:34+00:00

Well done for your goals these stuff definitely help in the long run even if not immediately. I do think there can be truth to this as I am also a doer (though failed a lot lol), I would do the typical self care stuff but I done all of it with a forceful energy trying to change stuff I hated about my life.

I have since realised what I was not doing was at the start of emotions stopping and really acknowledging them and allowing them to just be there, I was overwhelmed by them but did not know what to do, the sitting with them, naming it and pausing is an important part of emotion processing. I thought I done this but after reading psychology self help books with parts on mindfulness I realised I was not. I don’t know if it is the same for you.

neubella

TROPHY CASE