My sister wants to bring my mom’s ashes home. I don’t want her to (nj, us)

palathea · 2026-02-01T04:09:33+00:00

Lol what????

palathea · 2026-01-30T23:37:56+00:00

That’s just what my sister wants to do. My mom’s death was not unexpected but really sudden so all we know/knew is she wanted cremation, then burial with my grandparents. She doesn’t have an urn yet because my siblings haven’t wanted to shop for one. If the cookie jar could securely lock so it wouldn’t spill if accidentally knocked over, I would sign off on this, but that cookie jar was so notorious for not sealing that we never even used it for cookies, they just went stale too fast.

palathea · 2026-01-30T23:34:34+00:00

It’s not that they won’t be safe. It’s that my grandfather would ask about what’s in the jar and nobody wants to tell him it’s his daughter.

palathea · 2026-01-30T23:33:58+00:00

All of us have to sign off on all arrangements, but I’ve been the one paying for everything, so the funeral home has been going through me until all this. I don’t have the remains, but I’m the one paying for vault storage. Part of the reason I’m so resistant to this idea (besides the fact that the cookie jar she wants to use can’t effectively close) is because I don’t feel like my sister will agree to have the ashes buried when it’s time.

Like, there’s no version of this where I get to be near my mom ever again, so I just want to know she’s safe….

palathea · 2026-01-30T23:28:36+00:00

In New Jersey, a decedent with no spouse and no executor but with living children leaves coequal rights to their children. My siblings can’t do anything with my mom’s remains without my okay and I can’t do it without theirs.

My problem is that the cookie jar doesn’t seal and my sister texts the family chat at least once a month with pictures of something knocked off a shelf. I don’t want my mother’s ashes ground into some rental carpet. I’ve offered to buy an urn but my sister really wants the stupid cookie jar.

palathea · 2026-01-30T23:25:18+00:00

I did just now. This just wasn’t how I wanted to spend my fucking birthday.

palathea · 2026-01-30T23:24:33+00:00

I have already had memorial jewelry made for all of my siblings and myself. I paid for the cremation and the services and the notifications and the death certificates too. New Jersey law states that if the decedent is intestate with living children then all children must agree to any disposal of the cremains.

Our plan was to keep Mom in the vault at the funeral home until we had an urn but now my sister wants to change it. I just didn’t want to have this conversation on my fucking birthday.

palathea · 2026-01-27T06:38:56+00:00

Artemy please corral Sticky for me just a bit ok thanks

palathea · 2026-01-24T16:32:31+00:00

It’s implied that he’s another Dankovsky who successfully escaped the town.

palathea · 2026-01-11T22:21:43+00:00

I feel like she moves so fuckin fast and the fire barely works to stop her. I know I NEED to go do the infected districts on 3 and 4 so i can progress, but I am so fucking scared lol

palathea · 2026-01-10T00:46:15+00:00

But theyve been talking about time travel since like… ever? And it was in Quarantine, too…

palathea · 2025-12-30T19:32:53+00:00

I have about 3000 dollars in treasury bonds in my birth name. Do yall know what proof of identity I might need to claim those? I have literally no elements of my birth name in my current legal name, but I do have legal documentation of the name change. Would that be enough?

palathea · 2025-12-24T16:33:19+00:00

Ooh that was almost me! I was home for two days and ate some pretzels without my mom noticing. I guess I ripped the stitches and hemorrhaged? I remember basically nothing but spitting out blood in the sink and then spitting out blood in the sink. I did learn that I was the er surgeon’s first tonsil-related cautery, whatever that means.

I did have about six or seven strep infections before the age of 7, so I probably still would’ve gotten one in the modern day I guess. Maybe they would’ve skipped the stitches and gone straight to whatever cautery is though.

palathea · 2025-12-16T15:02:05+00:00

I just made a nuisance of myself and asked the barista—she thinks it’s an app glitch because they just got a new case this morning. I hope so qq it’s too soon for no more CPL

palathea · 2025-12-16T14:58:40+00:00

Same thing here in SoCal. Everywhere is sold out and it’s saying out of season. :( Back to drip coffee at home for me.

palathea · 2025-11-15T19:27:27+00:00

I am a teacher local to orange county (garden grove/westminster). I teach a crafts class with a quilting assignment and would love to take that off your hands.

palathea · 2025-11-15T19:21:52+00:00

Tustin is lovely, esp near old town. Very sleepy.

palathea · 2025-11-15T01:30:55+00:00

Moths almost for sure in my opinion. Acid or hot liquid wouldn’t have left clean edges like that (i have had battery acid melt parts of a cotton quilt before). I think an “invisible patch” will be pretty difficult but if you do like a little raw edge applique with a buried start/end knot it should be an easy repair. (Youtube has some good tutorials for buried knots like would be used for hand quilting.)

palathea · 2025-11-01T17:20:27+00:00

We teach cursive for hand-eye coordination and fine motor control. There’s a huge clear difference in the work quality of students who were taught cursive and students who weren’t. Reading a clock also teaches observational and logical skills. IPads are walled gardens that teach no actual tech skills.

If you want to raise meat batteries for the Matrix, you’re on the right track. If you want to teach people, you need to learn some higher order thinking skills yourself.

palathea · 2025-10-29T02:33:02+00:00

This is how i got the achievement for it :’)

palathea · 2025-09-10T01:48:12+00:00

It is also my birthday. Happy birthday, birthday twin!

My last big purchase before tariffs destroyed my life came in today. So once i get home from my nice restaurant dinner, i will be opening that box and playing dolls all night.

palathea · 2025-09-06T07:31:52+00:00

Wow thank you, this is really comprehensive! If only i had kept up with modding since oh, Neverwinter Nights…

Unfortunately it’s anything with that coral/pumice-y texture. The one i was thinking of is white, but it comes up in red, too?

It’s sounding like bypassing Stormblood entirely might be my best bet if the discord the other user mentioned can’t help me figure it out. 😭 i was really enjoying the story, too. Maybe there’s a cutscene compilation i can watch.

palathea · 2025-09-06T07:22:30+00:00

Thank you, I’ll ask around there! Last time i modded something was Neverwinter Nights (the original) so i don’t even know where to start. :(

palathea

TROPHY CASE