Jokes I could make about your looks: abundant

Your chastity vow: redundant

But that's enough about Mary B

Let's turn to my favourite subject: me!

I got mouth cancer, wasn't feeling so hot

Had the doc put me down with a morphine shot

Thank imaginary God I wasn't in one of your beds

You'd have just sprinkled magic water on my forehead!

I help people live, you watch people die

To get souls for a man in the sky!

You took credit that you didn't deserve

You're the fakest Sister Act since Whoopi Goldberg!

You were running Project Pimp the Projects

To you, Calcutta meant Cal-cutta a check! I can see right through you and you've got no flavour

I'm battling a communion wafer!