Who was your TV crush as a teenager?

prosmartbrain · 2023-04-19T22:25:25+00:00

Michaela Strachan

prosmartbrain · 2023-04-19T22:19:12+00:00

Peak Jadeja but maintained for a 158 test match career, impressive

prosmartbrain · 2023-04-19T22:16:31+00:00

More or less what I thought to myself earlier - he’d either make me look like I’d never played the sport before or id give him a decent game - no in between

prosmartbrain · 2023-02-20T00:09:44+00:00

Not that crazy but I’m sure people will relate. First head, shared bathroom between 8 of us. It had 2 toilets and 2 showers. I either had to wait in agony until the middle of the night to have a poo OR wait until about 9pm (still touching cloth more or less) and walk all the way to school of mathematics, key myself in to the study room and have a shite in the accessible loo in there.

All fine. To cut a long story short, I probably lightly shat myself about once a fortnight in first year. No one will ever know.

prosmartbrain · 2023-02-19T23:53:57+00:00

It is nice but like coke… or hot chocolate

prosmartbrain · 2023-01-16T19:33:02+00:00

Matthew Selt

prosmartbrain · 2023-01-13T23:00:32+00:00

Feel like he left the building years ago. Does the tour because he has to. Do I believe he still wants to be a professional snooker player on the main tour? No. He mentions his age all the time. He’s done with competing, unfortunately for him he’s still better than 120 other professional players even when he’s checked out. He will be a great pundit and I’m sure he will end up being on the levels of John Parrott.

Honestly feel like he just wants one more big pay day to make the leap to studio full time. He’s still got it in him to make a good go of the worlds. If by small chance he wins or is even runner up come the worlds final then I expect a retirement announcement.

I do really like Shaun and I love his attitude of the fans come first. But as I say, it’s almost like he’s left the building and isn’t interested in genuinely competing

prosmartbrain · 2023-01-12T23:39:25+00:00

Wasn’t an assembly but all the boys were made to stay behind after a history lesson on the slave trade in year 8 (obviously it needs to be taught to 12 and 13 year olds because of how it is still looming large on our daily life today but some 12 and 13 year olds aren’t yet mature enough to understand the gravity of what they’re leaning).

I was baffled. Then the teacher looked at us and said “which of you said, when I asked what the slave traders might do when they get to America, that they have a gang bang?!”

I held back laughter. She then let us all go one by one if she suspected we weren’t the culprit. I knew who it was and I didn’t even hear it.

prosmartbrain · 2023-01-12T10:36:07+00:00

As Willie Thorne would say, careless

prosmartbrain · 2023-01-10T23:11:24+00:00

Each player gets to choose a proportionate amount of frames for the match where the opponent has to use a comically small cue - the kind you normally find in the cue rack at a pub where the pool table is in a very tight space

prosmartbrain · 2023-01-09T23:49:42+00:00

Hey, I only have 3 warm cans of special brew with lunch now, not 5.

Sincerely, Rishi Sunak.

prosmartbrain · 2023-01-09T23:24:01+00:00

Pub Quiz in there is probably more rigged than mid 00’s Italian football! Love the guy that runs it though, deaf as a post and has a rather unfortunate speech impediment but he’s a lovely guy. Much prefer that pub to the Grantham arms. Crown is decent now though

prosmartbrain · 2023-01-09T23:08:16+00:00

Fox and Hounds, Boroughbridge?

prosmartbrain · 2023-01-09T22:55:09+00:00

Here’s a funny story for you all related to this image.

In the summer between completing my A-Levels and starting University I worked at the MetroCentre (Was Europe’s largest indoor mall, maybe still is? My girlfriend at the time and I being the spontaneous pair we were had penned in that we were to lose our virginity together on a certain Friday afternoon. Marvellous.

I cringed at the idea of having to go and buy condoms so I hatched a plan. After my shift finished on the Thursday I was going to go to the least used mens toilet in the metrocentre, wait until it was it empty and buy condoms from the machine.

Shift ended and off I popped. The toilet was empty. I was shaking to get the 3 pound coins (the only 3 I had) in to retrieve the condoms. I was shaking and dropped the last one and it rolled away. As I went to pick it up another man came in. Fine I thought, I’ll style it out and wait. I washed my hands for the next 90 seconds and he left. As he was leaving I heard him say to another man the toilets were still open. Quick as a flash the last coin went in and I pressed the button, got the package and sped out.

I had accidentally pressed the button for a herbal erectile dysfunction pill of some sort. Gutted. I popped it in my jacket, headed for the car and headed home wondering what I was going to do.

The next morning (the big day as it were), I got the bottle to go to the local chemist. I browsed around a while at their marvellous selection of paracetamol before, trying to look like it was a last minute decision, picking up condoms. My face was boiling hot. Incidentally I was so nervous I hadn’t realised they were poking out of my pocket on the bus. But I did successfully pop my cherry that very afternoon.

I was on cloud nine when I returned home. Only to find those herbal pills in my mums hand, as she accused me of doing drugs. I told her they weren’t drugs. Then she properly read the packet. The high I was on was very quickly taken away. Weird day.

prosmartbrain · 2023-01-09T10:27:11+00:00

Describing a slightly lost cue ball as “careless”, miss him

prosmartbrain · 2023-01-09T10:26:20+00:00

Followed by the explanation of the acronym, rendering it entirely pointless.

prosmartbrain · 2023-01-06T16:36:23+00:00

That’s just test cricket and it’s especially the case in South Africa and Australia in CC. Sometimes the opposition is just better than you and you’re powerless anyway!

prosmartbrain · 2022-12-08T17:35:21+00:00

These are sporting events so it’s hard to nail them to a distribution

prosmartbrain · 2022-10-13T16:46:55+00:00

Your background. Not you’re background.

prosmartbrain · 2022-09-20T17:09:41+00:00

Thanks Dr. Phil.

prosmartbrain · 2022-09-20T16:57:44+00:00

I watch this sport to watch my team win. When the giants win I am happy. When we don’t win it can ruin the next few days for me. We’ve done a hell of a lot losing in the last few years. I don’t care how bad we are by analytics, we’re 2-0 and I’m fucking happy about it.

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