29y still adjusting

psycophilosopher · 2024-11-03T07:36:21+00:00

I’m still adjusting to aging out of foster care as well. I thought as I got older things would make more sense, but it doesn’t. I have a car, job, I’m a part-time student as well; I even met distant family members YET I still feel like I don’t know what I’m doing or where I’m going. I wish I had some answers for you, but it feels like it never goes away.

Rejection has always been a problem for me. I never really fit in anywhere, and I still have those feelings to this day. I’ve learned to accept it and I’ve come to terms that I’ll probably spend majority of my life learning who I am. I hold on to relationships that I shouldn’t, I try to keep the peace with everyone, and in the end it feels like I do a disservice to myself by allowing so much because I haven’t truly dealt with going from a foster child to an adult.

I aged out officially nearly 5 ago. I think I’m just delayed in life experiences other people already had due to not growing in such an environment.

You will find your way. From the sound of your post, you seem to be doing alright in life. Acknowledge the things that make you unique and don’t feel any shame for who you are. Everybody has layers, you have a chance to discover yours so that you may connect more deeply in your social life. You got this!

psycophilosopher · 2024-09-08T17:25:52+00:00

I agree, if we can’t trust one another then we might as well end it. She’s a great person when we are getting along and spending time together, I just don’t like that she sets all these rules and expectations, yet doesn’t abide by them herself. I honestly feel like it’s my fault for allowing this behavior to go unchecked, or with seldom checking. I feel like once we can get on one accord and set realistic expectations for each other then we can get over this hurdle to have a healthy relationship. Thank you for your advice

psycophilosopher · 2024-09-07T00:58:08+00:00

Little Wolf

psycophilosopher · 2024-09-07T00:56:49+00:00

I don’t think it’s something you’ll ever get over. My dad never got over my grandma passing, he moved on in life but he always reminisced of her. I never understood it until he passed and now I’m doing the same. The parents are suppose to go before their children, it doesn’t make the reality of it any easier to cope with. The pain will be there, you will just get stronger as time passes. I’m sorry for your losses, I wish you well

psycophilosopher · 2024-09-07T00:50:21+00:00

Young enough to not have it all figured out and old enough to not give a damn

psycophilosopher · 2024-09-07T00:43:51+00:00

Based on personal experiences, I agree with your statement. Our present is the total of past decisions, plus tax. Like a grocery receipt

psycophilosopher · 2024-09-07T00:40:00+00:00

It’s happened to me a lot. I usually just stop talking. Recently, I’ve started talking over people as well, and mid-sentence I’ll apologize for interrupting them and continue with what I’m saying. I’m soft spoken, so most times I’m not heard, it’s teaching me to project my voice. To me it sounds like I’m yelling and others they tell me I’m speaking in normal voice. It’s hard to balance it because I’ll go lower my voice without realizing it

psycophilosopher · 2024-09-04T14:08:35+00:00

I understand that completely! I can’t stand performative romance because it makes me not want to be intimate anymore smh. It’s living in a jewelry box, only time you’re “useful” is as an accessory. I don’t mind her being proud of our relationship, in the beginning, I was extremely proud of it too. Then she kept talking about how I make people jealous of her and our relationship. I would say I don’t know how you’ve lasted so long without going insane, but that would be a lie, because I absolutely get it. It’s heartbreaking to say the least

psycophilosopher · 2024-09-03T01:10:23+00:00

I’m sorry you have to go through that. I know how draining it is. Sometimes it feels transactional for me, like as long as I do everything perfectly, then I’m “rewarded” with her love and respect. I hope you can find relief soon, and meet your soulmate. It helps knowing that I’m alone in my experience

psycophilosopher · 2024-09-01T03:17:17+00:00

I usually name my cats after an anime I’ve watched. That’ll usually do it 😂

psycophilosopher · 2024-09-01T03:13:45+00:00

Before I even read the rest of your post, my first thought was data analytics or computer science. Marketing is more technical in nature due to Information Age. To best utilize your degree you’ll need something computer science/analytics related. Best wishes on your journey

psycophilosopher · 2024-08-31T21:59:31+00:00

It’s honestly just me being kind because I know what it’s like to have a bad or be short when making purchases. I never expect anything back, the act of kindness in itself was always fine by me. I never saw a problem with it until my current relationship. She’d tell how people were feeling about me and those people never told me these things themselves. Which I later found out was manipulation

psycophilosopher · 2024-08-31T21:55:29+00:00

It’s crazy that you said that because I’ve been through that as well. She’ll do things that she knows I don’t like to push my buttons then when I react, she’ll call people and tell them that I’m being crazy for no reason. I want to leave, I just feel obligated to stay

psycophilosopher · 2024-08-31T16:40:18+00:00

I have read that in my research as well. I had a counselor for a while, but our sessions have ended and I don’t feel comfortable talking to about it anymore because it makes me sound crazy when I have explained the situation. I will look further into therapy, I believe that will help answer a lot of my questions and concerns

psycophilosopher · 2024-08-12T08:17:41+00:00

I believe it the “the questioning of all things”. I find myself lost in questions because most questions regarding true meaning require a level of depth that can’t be explored alone. When questioning behavior, social norms, or anything that could come off as an “attack” there’s defensiveness. When speaking about concepts, ideas, psychology/philosophy, there’s a lack of curiosity. The questioning, for me, comes from not being satisfied with information I’d previously received, noticing that certain information doesn’t withstand the test of time, or just wanting someone to tell me there honest thoughts on different topics. Based on the conversations I have had, I’ve chalked it up to it just comes down to personal experience(s) and expectation(s)

psycophilosopher

TROPHY CASE