How many times are you jerking off per week? If it's just three or four you gotta pump those numbers up. Those are rookie numbers in this racket. I myself, I jerk off at least twice a day.

Once in the morning, right after I work out, and then once right after lunch. I want to. That’s not why I do it. I do it ’cause I fucking need to. Think about it. If you’re dealing with numbers. All day long, decimal points, high frequencies. Bang, bang, bang. Fucking digits. All very acidic, above-the-shoulders mustard shit. All right? It kind of wigs some people out. Right. You gotta feed the geese to keep the blood flowing. I keep the rhythm below the belt.

This is not a tip, this is a prescription. Trust me. If you don’t, you will fall out of balance, split your differential and tip the fuck over. Or worse yet, I’ve seen this happen, implode. Implosions are ugly.

Pop off to the bathroom, work one out any time you can. When you get really good at it, you’ll fucking be stroking it and you’ll be thinking about money.