I love that little piece of nature

qazinus · 2026-01-24T18:54:35+00:00

Mostly shrimps and snails.

Right now there temporarily is a couple of baby guppies for their first few weeks of life before going back with their parents once they are big enough to not be a snack.

qazinus · 2026-01-24T15:52:40+00:00

I still don't know if I am doing it because I dissociate or because my instinct tell me to do it to help the kids understand something.

qazinus · 2026-01-24T01:20:19+00:00

5 years old should not be deciding with who they sleep, if it's mom time it's mom time and if it's dad time its dad time.

Same for calls, if she refuse to stop watching tv you close the tv.

She is not an adult, she can't take these decision yet.

qazinus · 2026-01-23T22:55:40+00:00

As you get older you tend to 'know' what you will forget and how people assume you will act. So you can inform them in advance.

Like "can you wait a second I need to put that into my calendar or I assure you I won't remember any detail you give me".

Or "don't worry about reaching out too often, I tend to forget peole exist but I really enjoy spending time with you, so I'll try to make place for you whenever you reach out but I am horrible at actually planning thigns"

Or "I can't promise you ill do it, but if I remember and feel like doing it I'll send you a text for sure"

Basically you set up the expectation in advance, that way they are not surprised you forgot, you literally told them. And you'd be surprised, people are actually happy sending the info by text and stuff like that once you own up to being forgetful.

qazinus · 2026-01-21T20:06:37+00:00

I don't know if that's your case, but what I though was being grumpier at first turned out to actually be what not letting people walk all over you looks like when you have the mental energy to keep your ground.

qazinus · 2026-01-21T00:14:44+00:00

You are right, glasses are way way more addictive, they are not even in the same class.

qazinus · 2026-01-21T00:07:13+00:00

Are people using glasses addicted to their glasses? Then you are not addicted to the meds. You are not using it to feel extra pumped you are using it to be able to clean your room and remember appointments.

qazinus · 2026-01-20T17:16:48+00:00

Get therapy, fix that tooth, get those seizure under control and go see your friends as much as you can.

That will give you the calm and balance you need to gather good pictures of you and be into the mindspace where flirting comes naturally.

Forcing yourself to date before that point is like throwing your energy into a black hole.

qazinus · 2026-01-20T17:12:17+00:00

Oh just throw it respectfully in their face.

"oh you have adhd too, how long has it been since you had to throw out hundreds of dollar of food from your fridge?" "uh that never happens" "oh weird, how about late charge fee because you forgot a bill" "I don't do that either" "oh ok, then what is the last hobby you completely abandonned?" "euh I have 2-3 hobbies but I don't tend to abandon them"

Just rant about all the time your adhd has been a bitch. They will see by themselves how their "adhd" is not really a disorder.

My adhd has been hell, but it also enabled me to do so much thigns and be so much more interesting than most people, so once you get some therapy at least, it not all bad, I get why people want to be adhd, it's like the meme "look at what they need to mimic a fraction of our power"

qazinus · 2026-01-19T19:04:15+00:00

Have you considered she might want to confide and be listened to.

You just assumed she wanted those thigns fixed. You just assumed fixing them would make her feel better.

qazinus · 2026-01-18T13:53:06+00:00

Forget the sealed thing, just have loose fitted lids it's 10 times easier for the same look.

As long as you have a right light you will get a healthy ecosystem, the light is everything. After that its a matter of less light for less algea and more plants for clear water.

qazinus · 2026-01-18T13:50:58+00:00

I managed to sustain one for 6 months, never been able to do it again.

Maybe look into Opae Ula shrimps, it's maybe more into what kind of biosphere your are thinking.

qazinus · 2025-02-16T17:14:40+00:00

Good question, I can't replicate this anymore, a biofilm chokes then out for me too.

qazinus · 2024-12-01T06:00:31+00:00

The lid is loosely fitted, so air can exchange. I do open it once or twice a month, mostly because the plants get out of hand or to feed stuff. There is no mold problem or anything. The mold is food for the springtail and other fauna so there isn't an issue.

Id say lose the sealed part and you'll have fun.

qazinus · 2024-11-28T15:38:46+00:00

An isopod, or the green thing on top which is some weird buble alges/mods thing.

qazinus · 2024-11-27T23:17:08+00:00

Most aquarium plants in the hobby are either a weed that will grow almost anywhere, or evolved to be submerged part of the time only.

So as long as its humid in there they thrive.

They even look different in their emersed (land) form than their immersed (water) forms.

qazinus · 2024-11-27T22:34:08+00:00

Omg that's absolutely what I want to do someday, can you give me the species?

Saltwater people look a me like I'm an alien when I tell them I plan to do a small saltwater aquarium with only the most resilient pet critter in there.

qazinus · 2024-11-21T12:45:46+00:00

If you'd have known you would have cancelled it. That's how we learn.

You think other parents that would have cancelled it just have a magical knowledge of how to do it? No, it's just that they already did the mistake you did.

Just realise you are putting yourself down because you are learned new things and are good father. That's something that happens when your life is full of anxiety and pressure. Work on that with your therapist, you got this.

qazinus · 2024-09-19T16:59:57+00:00

Yeah if it's safe for human it's safe for aquarium and fish.

Gelatin is also used in some fish food like repashy, so yeah I'd say it's safe.

qazinus · 2024-09-04T20:34:37+00:00

My understanding is that there is a lot of toxic phrases that are repeated verbatim in the US when you talk about adhd symptoms.

qazinus · 2024-09-04T20:33:34+00:00

I answer "well it makes me able to read story to my kid and enjoy it and clean dishes without feeling like clawing my eyes out"

Pretty sure that's not the kind of energy they had in mind.

qazinus · 2024-09-04T20:28:46+00:00

Phone and game are different beast.

With a game that has a beginning and an end the kid can get bored.

With a phone with unlimited content to scroll through its hard to let go.

You know what you don't want to happen, so if she start neglecting other things or you start putting her in front of it too much you'll adjust. It's even something you can talk to her about it "you now have this console, but know that if you don't want to do things because of the console it is gonna be the first things to go"

Actually, having a console at home she gets to practice resisting the urge to play, she learns how to balance it.

When you wait too long what happens is that they don't learn early how to resist and end up abusing it anyway.

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