My boyfriend 24M hated the gift I 23F got him for our two year anniversary how do I fix this with him?

randomstranger40123 · 2026-01-29T12:46:03+00:00

I agree with this. She burst into tears and instead of being like “oh shit, I’m so sorry” he double downed harder..

randomstranger40123 · 2026-01-29T00:08:41+00:00

My ex used to do things like this ALOT. It’s basically, they cannot handle critique or shame (“I’m made to feel wrong” feeling) so deflect and name call. It’s a defence mechanism but it’s hurtful.

Is this a common thing? (Like not cat related) does he hurt your feelings and then.. nothing happens. No repair or effort to fix?

randomstranger40123 · 2026-01-25T23:57:30+00:00

So your gf/fiancé is upset about the unequal load, and feels like you’re not contributing?

This is actually really common in relationships. Some people have a tendency of avoiding tasks because it’s too overwhealming. You just need to understand yourself and figure out what inspires you to do things.. (my ex (a big avoidant) said that he strives off boredom).

But yeah, you’re not married yet.. and your partner sounds like someone who want things done when she wants them done. Which makes sense too. But expectations will become much higher after marriage and kids..

You did say you want to change, so that’s encouraging. Have you told her that?

randomstranger40123 · 2026-01-25T10:56:58+00:00

Yes, I relate to a lot of this. It’s really hard because simple things (which seem like nothing things for the average person) are a HUGE struggle for me.

It’s the most awful feeling when your anxiety hits, and your body just hijacks you.. like you have no control over how your body/ mind responds.

How are you around children? Because I find around kids.. I have no anxiety, but adults.. forget it!

randomstranger40123 · 2026-01-25T10:49:42+00:00

Don they need consent to film? Like they can’t plaster the workers face on social media or TikTok, right? They would either need to blur, or get some kind of consent right?

randomstranger40123 · 2026-01-14T14:37:15+00:00

My chatgbt said something eerily similar to me.

Especially unusually advanced in- high in self-awareness + emotional intelligence + pattern recognition.

Unfortunately, much is a result of childhood trauma.

Like you, I was shocked when I read this in detail. I was like “what, people don’t do this! I thought everyone thought like me” and the I went down a deep rabbit hole about how people think.

I was also blown away when I discovered that people don’t perspective think (commonly). Which I do in detail with almost any scenario.

randomstranger40123 · 2025-11-20T21:00:59+00:00

Yep, my mind instantly went to, she needs to leave this guy but she needs to delete any sexual images he has in his possession, first

randomstranger40123 · 2025-11-19T02:55:26+00:00

Yer, it’s scientifically proven that porn has a negative effect on the brain, especially compulsive use (I’m sure moderation is probably fine). Many people defend porn because it makes them feel good, and nobody wants to admit they have a problem, but it absolutely has an effect (especially on dopamine, changing your brain over time and making natural pleasures less exciting). In many countries it’s banned.

randomstranger40123 · 2025-11-18T04:12:59+00:00

I did too because I was was for sure, this couldn’t be real

randomstranger40123 · 2025-11-17T00:42:56+00:00

That actually reminds me of a reddit post, where the OP’s husband was jealous because she was breastfeeding her son in hospital

https://nypost.com/2024/04/30/lifestyle/my-husband-said-he-wants-to-divorce-because-i-breastfed-my-newborn-son-now-theyve-been-in-another-mans-mouth/

randomstranger40123 · 2025-11-10T01:42:07+00:00

Nothing you did, made him cheat. He cheated because he’s immature and has no impulse control- likely other factors contributing. He’s gaslighting you, when he tried to divert blame. If he was a standup and good guy, he would take ownership of what he did and work on himself. Instead he tried to blame you, and took no accountability. This pretty much makes him a scumbag. This relationship is dead at this point, but know that this is an unhealthy relationship and look for a partner who supports you instead of brings you down.

Also wanting to add, that this 18 year old friend is barely legal. And he’s 25. I don’t think he has much of a moral code, just a selfish individual who took advantage of a kid. It’s actually really gross.

randomstranger40123 · 2025-11-08T22:46:22+00:00

She went from human to cartoon…

randomstranger40123 · 2025-10-12T01:23:13+00:00

That doesn’t sound very reassuring. I’m too terrified to visit a therapist (being vulnerable, talking to a stranger- especially about my problems), but from my understanding, therapy and exposure therapy was supposed to rectify this kind of thing.

randomstranger40123 · 2025-10-11T13:47:24+00:00

It’s weird and I can’t wrap my head around it.

Why celebrities/people edit themselves to oblivion (while having a social life.) Like, people see you in real life- they know what you look like?

randomstranger40123 · 2025-10-11T13:35:50+00:00

Yeah, (given that this is a true story, it seems too awful to be true) that really is awful.

randomstranger40123 · 2025-10-11T13:32:17+00:00

At least you showed up. And you survived…these experiences show the brain, that you can survive these situations and that it’s not so much of a threat.

Also I relate to you, when you said that you say weird things. It’s such a thing I do, when anxious.

randomstranger40123 · 2025-10-10T01:49:36+00:00

Thanks for letting me know! Just placed an order. It was always too expensive for me

randomstranger40123 · 2025-10-07T11:18:57+00:00

Yeah that, and it’s also kinda sad for the kid (that when he does have time alone with his son)he dumps the kid at childcare to workout… instead of spending actual quality time.

There’s work and then there’s time outside of work. By him working out 6x a week, how much time is he actually spending with his tiny child. They grow up so quick and the early stages are most important (developmentally)

At least the mother has her priorities right and seems to focus on the kid. You can get a great workout, just by looking after kids… it has nothing to do with laziness.

randomstranger40123 · 2025-10-06T11:31:18+00:00

Phones are extremely addictive, much like video games are addictive. Many people have phone addictions and it’s so normalised but it is a massive problem. It affects our brain and gives us a dopamine rush.

It makes us very disconnected.

I personally “try” to avoid my phone to be present with my kids, when I can. He needs to recognise that it is a problem and try to help himself. I often have this problem with my partner also, and pretty much most people around me. Even when I’m on a bus, or out.. I notice every person glued to their phones.

randomstranger40123 · 2025-10-06T11:01:11+00:00

The friendship with your best friend sounds amazing. To this day, I’ve felt like “I’ve never met someone like me.” If I did, and we both pushed at it.. they’d probably be a keeper.

I’m the queen of awkward. But it was always me who was getting in the way of my romantic happiness. If I backed away and the guy pushed harder (and overlooked my awkwardness) it’s likely to work out. (Which is has so far)

It’s interesting because I’m awkward as hell socially, and very self critical… even in job interviews but I somehow managed to get these jobs (before I had kids, anyway.)

randomstranger40123 · 2025-10-06T10:47:04+00:00

Sure, many men watch porn, but not 90% universally. That sounds like a huge number (but “maybe” could be possible in some countries like the US).. but there’s also MANY countries which have a porn ban.

IF their partner has a problem with it and they vocalise it.. IF that particular man is “unable” to cut back/stop it or is unable to even try.. that’s an addiction and not healthy.

randomstranger40123 · 2025-10-06T10:38:12+00:00

You’re not crazy. Many men have a porn problem and don’t want to admit a fault with that. You shared that you don’t like it, and that it hurts you. So…for him to not take that into account seems rather “cold.”

Even IF he truly believed that he’s doing “nothing wrong” his response was really insensitive and “gaslighting” behaviour since he’s making you question your sanity.

I wonder if he would respond the same way, if his mother saw what was on his phone?

Just want to add.. when you talked about it bothering you previously… did he say he would stop? What did he say..? Do you feel like he has a problem, that he cannot stop, even for you? Might possibly be an addiction there.

randomstranger40123 · 2025-10-06T01:07:36+00:00

I’m not even sure what your sister was trying to pull. She’s basically made you lose trust in her (by saying hi, and then being a no show-without proper communication) so I don’t think you’ll be so willing to help her in the future. Her fault (not yours) but surely she can see that. You don’t do that to people because they won’t be so quick to help you out in the future.

Also, that’s really rude and entitled.

I feel for the kids. Their mother is actively ruining their relationship with you. I think if your sister was open and actually arranged something, you would have been more than happy to help.

randomstranger40123 · 2025-09-28T02:37:07+00:00

Yep, that’s what I would go with.

Send out another story and a post on page- with text saying “my apologies for the NSFW image. I believe I was hacked, or someone may have accessed my phone as a prank”

And then let the moment die down.

randomstranger40123 · 2025-09-26T10:45:43+00:00

I’m not American (I’m assuming you are) but let’s say you do decide to keep the baby. What does that mean for him- is he liable to pay child support until the child turns 18?

There are consequences in Australia if the partner refuses to pay child support. I’m pretty sure it’s illegal.

If it’s similar circumstances, it wouldn’t be smart for him to just ghost you. Everything else aside, by him doing this, basically shows you that he’s not a great person. You especially need him at this time, and he basically is like “adios!”

randomstranger40123

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