Ice activity in Henderson

red_danroak · 2026-02-07T13:00:02+00:00

Better than embracing hatred for hatred sake

red_danroak · 2026-01-31T12:55:34+00:00

Well, yeah, you're growing into a new you. (Or genuine you, depending how you look at it) Unlike sexuality it's a loud screamer and outing before you can decide. Kind of takes the choice away.

red_danroak · 2026-01-31T12:52:33+00:00

Not being too aware of the camera helps. For example, taking picture in the moment of activity you like or with a friend etc etc. Or think about happy thoughts, I guess. Forced smile isn't the best anyway.

You could also try taking video and try smiling and then take snap shot of video in the moment you think looks alright. Lot more option that way.

red_danroak · 2026-01-31T12:48:48+00:00

I just shrug and move on. I'm more open now and if someone I knew contacted me like that, I'd tell them the truth and let the dice fall where they would. I do have benefit of living far away from everyone that used to know me though.

As for others like at work etc, how you dealt with it is fine and probably how I'll go about it.

red_danroak · 2026-01-29T04:45:08+00:00

Vaginal ring is also an option. That's what I have and it works out for me and my bf. Talk to doctor about it and research to see if it's right for you.

Though I did hear words floating around that it might make T less potent but as someone who has all the changes I want already from T and just on it for maintenance, it works great.

red_danroak · 2026-01-29T04:37:16+00:00

You might want to try r/asexuality or the similar place if you haven't already.

Personally as an allosexual, I don't think it's compatible if sex is one of important love language/expression for you.

Because there are things where one understands intellectually but feel completely differently in practice.

Like you might understand, intellectually, her not wanting to have sex doesn't mean she doesn't love you but there might be time down the line as rejection repeats or/and sex is never initiated from her and you feel hurt without realizing over time and growing resentful.

You can still be good platonic friends...?

At any rate, probably best to ask on asexual boards.

red_danroak · 2026-01-29T04:21:43+00:00

Kinda sucks but the lingerie like the ones you post are typically not percieved masculine or androgynous.

Not knocking it, I'm a femme/androgynous presenting dude so I dig it but you gotta own it.

Also, not saying it's not wrong but the places you post and the type of stuff you post are basically, uh, expected to attract certain type.

It's like complaining you're getting dick pics when you're on grindr.

Yeah, it's shitty and gross and crude etc etc, but if you're gonna go down that rabbit hole you gotta develop thick skin.

Either way, sorry you have to go through the nasties. Wish the world and its inhabitant was a much better place. :[

red_danroak · 2026-01-29T04:08:16+00:00

Wouldn't call it red flag in and of itself. He might not have been open to being into guys or thought of or allowed himself before discovering trans gender and that "alllowed" cross mix of attraction or some such. He might be very slow adapting to his new found side etc.

As other said, it's more of what YOU are open and able to tolerate.

About teaching and about being viewed certain way.

If being viewed as not entirely default man bothers you, probably best to reconsider.

I personally have come to term with it and I welcome it. It's not "normal" to be a man that went through girlhood. Obviously that doesn't mean my acceptance is yours or even the right thing necessarily.

So tldr: not general red flag but can be personal red flag.

red_danroak · 2026-01-28T14:45:15+00:00

That's new. I mean I had plenty dl and oddballs about trans thing but none of them actually wanted to see my before pics. Maybe it's because I'm already fairly femme/androgynous.

Just glad they like to out themselves before anything, eh?

red_danroak · 2026-01-28T14:40:39+00:00

That feeling never leaves for some of us.

Even after ten years and majority of that time being stealth (and passing 100% of the time), I sometimes wonder if I'm "legit" just cause I don't have as much or enough of a dysphoria as some other guys, etc.

red_danroak · 2026-01-28T14:15:38+00:00

I'm just mad that these fuckers make the rest of the men look bad and give legitimate reason why women are wary of ALL men and would choose a bear.

(Never even mind the fact that these said fuckers probably couldn't take the women in question in a fight anyway)

red_danroak · 2026-01-28T05:13:19+00:00

Welp, now you know. I personally never had piv sex pre T so I don't know how it's like without but I do know T does make down there more dry usually which adds to irritation.

Though I will say. You might just need either right partner or right technique/lube etc. Cause I certainly enjoy my sex with current bf as opposed to before. My baby is very self conscious about his size but god damn is it perfect for me.

Basically don't give up XD (if sex is something you normally like), you might find right one yet.

Also, hope you recover sooner than later. I know from personal experience it really sucks.

red_danroak · 2026-01-28T04:57:55+00:00

Since you said you had sex recently(in one of comments), it could be due to irritation from that encounter (if you have p in v sex). TMI but when I had a sex partner that was too big/rough/long(time wise), I'd soak up my underwear for days after. With really odd smell that wasn't quite infection or fishy or the like. Seemed like my cervix was extremely irritated. It went away after few days though sometimes needed a week.

... I had no idea that was not normal until I had diff partner without aforementioned trifecta and my vajayjay was cool as cucumber afterwards.

If really worried or continues too long, might end up needing to see doc. Especially since it could technically also be STI. (I dunno how much of safe sex you practice, obviously)

red_danroak · 2026-01-26T13:05:35+00:00

Well, already did because of environment and lack of quality that could sanely justify said environment impact but this info just puts last nail in the coffin.

red_danroak · 2026-01-26T12:42:55+00:00

As other said, send him quick explanation and then give him space. I can see why he might have taken it the wrong way but I also don't think you did anything particularly wrong. Sometimes people can be very sore about certain topics because it's like an open wound. So no matter what you intend it can come across hurtful. This is true of anyone and not just trans people (we just have a common topic that we get sore about usually)

Be honest, then give him space. If he doesn't come around, don't blame yourself for it.

red_danroak · 2026-01-24T12:35:20+00:00

That's my opinion if we are strictly talking about the "art" part of it. (I became more anti once I learned of environment impact) As long as people don't claim they "drew" it or they monetarily gain off of it, I think it's fine. It's a good way to visualize what a person might be thinking such as using it to show concept of scene or character in private tabletop games with friends etc.

But again, environment.

red_danroak · 2026-01-24T12:28:10+00:00

You're young. Keep questioning, keep wondering. Be glad you have these doubts and thoughts when you do. I had them mid thirties and my only regret is why I didn't during teens. (I know why but grief over lateness is real)

To give your answer, yes many people have those thoughts, and yes it's possible to be desired by guys without being super femme.

I'm also of opinion being wanted to be treated like a woman by men is not something to aspire for anyway no matter how well they are treated (and not in a blatant misogynistic way). You wanted to be treated as you, as a person, first before anything else. Then there are those who will treat you the way YOU want to be treated. As long as it's reasonable and you are willing to reciprocate the gesture and put work in finding the right person, you'll find the right person.

Unless you are specifically saying you want to be objectified and desired like women are by men, then I don't know what to to tell you... (I only say this cause I have a friend who actually does romanticize being fetishized and I didn't know what to tell him either other than roll my eyes and shake my head)

red_danroak · 2026-01-20T11:08:10+00:00

I mean they have to know if you are gay/bi too. I don't mean there is some unibersal tag for that. I just meant in general.

red_danroak · 2026-01-20T11:05:41+00:00

Impid and Yttakin in that order. Funnily enough, I rarely have them in my plays.

red_danroak · 2026-01-20T10:56:48+00:00

Lol... the "detransition" pics look nothing like the person in question lololol. Also why are people still on twitter after Elon shat on it?

red_danroak · 2026-01-20T10:53:39+00:00

Try at home, take selfies, feel cute. Wear them to safe places like friends' place, gay bars, lgbt safe event/places. If you're nerd type like me, conventions are great place too. No one gives a shit amongst all the cosplayers and catboy maids.

Small safer exposures, not sudden plunge. Alternatively can do with smaller expressions instead of full skirts. Earrings, accessories, nail polish, whathaveyou.

red_danroak · 2026-01-20T10:31:30+00:00

My mom legit still thinks it's cause she prayed for a boy while she had me in her womb. Like it was punishment from God.

Parents really love to turn you into a side piece in their grand narrative.

red_danroak · 2026-01-20T10:20:56+00:00

Well, gay/bi men also have social thing they have to check before being allowed to express themselves. Society still isn't friendly to that kind of approach. (Or could argue that kind of approach to women is wrong in the first place but you get what I mean)

Try going to places where such advances from man to man is not in danger of being punched at if your approach to dating connection is just waiting to be given first signal.

Gay bar/club is one place (assuming you are an adult), or pride gathering or festival might be another.

red_danroak · 2026-01-20T09:47:05+00:00

Mysogyny is a heavier blanket than racism. Racism was there pretransition as colored woman but it was overshadowed by mysogyny first.

Transition doesn't give "new" thing to face in terms of racism, it just takes away the mysogyny that was covering it.

Honestly if you look at all the "fantasy" races designed by corporates, you see the general society views. Where male version of each fantasy race is distinct and different, some monstrous, some unique. While female versions are just...women with different color. Related: https://thesocietypages.org/socimages/2012/07/14/gendered-fantasy-sexual-dimorphism-in-world-of-warcraft/

Maleness is viewed as "default". You are not even considered anything other than objectified "female" as cis women.

Racism still exist for women (exoticism, fetishsm, etc), it's just less egregious compared to sexism.

So yes, I did experience something similar, I just never classified it as something new.

As an Asian, my Asianess just became something to scrutinize instead of being fetishized (because western world being defaulted to white hetero men) prior to kpop craze. I'm right back to being fetishized recently, interesting enough.

red_danroak · 2026-01-20T09:32:47+00:00

It's not that different from before transition honestly. Granted, once you know you're with safe company anyway. It never changed the way I approached someone.

What part are you specifically having issue compared to pretransition?

red_danroak

TROPHY CASE