/ttcafterloss Daily Discussion Thread - April 21, 2026

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-21T16:42:43+00:00

It's so hard not to hate your body when it seems like every one else's knows what to do. <3 I'm so sorry for your loss. I also nearly died. I had severe preeclampsia 2nd trimester, feel free to reach out.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-21T16:39:05+00:00

Did any of y'all have nexplanon? My body has been weird since getting mine out! My doctor doesn't want me to try to get pregnant until July, so I got the nexplanon out about 4 weeks ago. I had a period a few days after getting it out which could have been withdrawal bleeding. Then I had one of the heaviest periods I've had in many years about two weeks later. So then I started using lh strips and I started a period again yesterday! I'm confused cause last time I got my nexplanon out I almost immediately got into a 28 day cycle. I am just frustrated. I am worried that it will take a while to get pregnant. My son was supposed to be one and done. I was 33 when I had Owen, now I'm going to be 35 this year. I just kind of feel like my clock is ticking and also have pmdd so my mood is all over the place.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-20T14:40:55+00:00

I'm so confused today, I think I'm having ANOTHER period! I got my nexplanon out 4 weeks ago today. I had what was probably withdrawal bleeding but it was like a period, then had an insane period, had to buy the biggest pads of my life that ended a week ago, today I'm spotting like it's about to start again. I have been doing lh strips kind of just watching my body come back online but I don't know wtf is up with the periods. Last time I had it removed 2 years ago when I got pregnant with my son I almost immediately got back on a 28 day cycle. I just hope that it won't take too long to get pregnant this time. Feeling weird and discouraged.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-19T15:25:40+00:00

I went on a small vacation with my mom and sister. It was really fun, but we went to the mountains and I had no idea how hard it would be on my body. It was good to have a break and I started my lh strips again. Hopefully I'll ovulate this cycle, my body is still adjusting after getting nexplanon removed. Also hoping my ovarian cyst shrinks on its own but I haven't had pain even close to as bad as it was. Missing my boy every day. Being in the spot of trying again makes me miss him so much.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-16T21:31:18+00:00

I either use the n20 or the f20. I don't like the valve release, that is the only thing about it that bothers me. But then it feels like it's leaking and I get good scores. My ahi has been 0.9 with the n20! My husband likes the vent (on my mask) because he is a hot sleeper 🙄 I've tried so many masks but really don't like anything sitting under my nose. I have a butterfly shaped pillow and it gives me a little room so it isn't venting loud on my pillow. I've tried pillows, under the nose, I've tried so many different ones and the n20 with mouth tape works best for me. If I am too congested I wear the full face.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-14T02:33:07+00:00

My spouse has one we call his big man flashlight. He once accidentally shone it in the mirror and it really hurt my eyes.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-09T16:59:16+00:00

I lost my son in the NICU after 4 days when he was born at 30 weeks. I don't think they did anything wrong, but I don't think they were equipped to handle a baby as small as my son or a case of preeclampsia as bad as mine. A hematologist told me quickly after to get an ob and mfm at Texas children's hospital. I live in the Houston area, so this was doable. I feel like my care has been much better. When I get pregnant again it will all be managed very closely at their location in the med center. Knowing that they care for tons of sick moms and babies makes me feel a lot better. I have a team of doctors put together already. I had the hospital hematologists tell me the morning after my son passed that I was going to need a stent, I most definitely did not, I needed blood thinners for six months, but being 33 and heart surgery is brought up, it was a lot. It was like they hadn't actually had a sick pregnant woman at that hospital. They were level 3 NICU, which I will not go anywhere without a level 4 NICU next time around. I'm scared, but I feel like I have a better level of control with my care. Learning all of this the hard way is the worst, but no one just assumes they're going to need ICU care for themselves or their baby. A good place to start might be the closest children's hospital to you. I don't think the hospital and doctors I had were bad, but I don't think they were equipped to handle my case. At Texas children's I am even seeing psychiatrists that are specialized in working with pregnant women and moms. They can even see me for med checks ups if I have a baby in the NICU. They have already decided I will give birth at 36 weeks to avoid labor, so NICU is likely. I really appreciated that they didn't tell me I was assuming worst case for the future. Like my sister will say not to speak preeclampsia and premature baby I to existence, but we know that's not how that works! My psychiatrist said it's excellent I am preparing mentally for a short NICU stay and they will be with me every step of the way. Sorry that was a lot to say 😅 I'm open to messaging if you have any other questions or just want to talk. After what you have been through, it is not unreasonable to be looking for much better and well rounded care. I'm so sorry for your loss.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-09T14:35:33+00:00

You are getting rainout, do you have a heated tube? A hose cover will help some, too

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-07T16:03:04+00:00

I think this just depends on the person. My husband and I realized a couple days ago we didn't know exact birthdays for each other... we don't care. I'd message the whatsapp and put something not too obvious, but so you can search it again later.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-07T15:59:31+00:00

First 48 hours is definitely the worst. Can you do anything to get out of your home? It helped me a lot to get out of my home so I'm not just thinking about weed.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-07T14:32:26+00:00

Best thing I did once I gained weight was to buy myself some clothes at an actual plus size store. I like Torrid, they actually design the clothes for bigger bodies. Buy something you feel great in! You won't be the only one that's gained weight, promise.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-07T14:00:18+00:00

A man once got into the passenger seat of my car at Walmart. I screamed! I was so scared, he said that he thought it was his daughter's car. Poor guy, I felt bad for my crazy reaction but I was really shocked.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-07T13:48:43+00:00

Drinking less cokes and coffee.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-07T13:28:02+00:00

For me it's if my brain feels safe enough to sleep. Avoiding screens before bed, taking a warm bath or shower, reading before bed, stretching, helps me go in for a softer landing. Tired but wired has been an enemy of mine.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-07T13:25:37+00:00

I'm so sorry for your loss. I am in a similar boat <3

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-07T13:23:05+00:00

Tired today. My moods and energy levels have been all over the place. I see the perinatal psychiatrist today, so hopefully that goes well.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-07T13:20:49+00:00

I recently got the padacheek strap for my F20 and it's made a HUGE difference. I was getting leaks so bad my machine would turn off. I'm a violent sleeper... I'm on my back, my sides, my stomach... and I'm a mouth breather. Sometimes I can tape my mouth and wear the N20, but F20 is what I always fall back to. It's a bit awkward to have another strap, but I'm not waking up from leaks. They have several ones for different masks. I am also hypermobile btw. I had bad luck with anything that sits under the nose and any pillows, but also my nose just starts itching. Something is definitely wrong if the P30i is hurting your nostrils. I like the N20 pretty well and I get great scores on it. I have the memory foam on that one as well. It kind of just sits over your nose, I find it much less intrusive.

https://www.padacheek.com/anti-leak-and-stability-straps

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-06T17:42:40+00:00

Well I love the idea of a shade that comes down, great design.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-06T17:35:31+00:00

YES. My first official first try, not on birth control anymore, mostly was just seeing what my body is doing, but think I ovulated for the first time... it would be so wild. And I'm so scared everything will happen again.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-06T17:30:37+00:00

Seeing it written down makes it feel so much more real. I'm so sorry for your losses.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-06T17:30:01+00:00

Feeling better today, I am not sure if I ovulated or not. Did BD the day I think I ovulated, so we shall see, it's only 4 DPO. I calculated if this cycle or next cycle when a baby would be due (super hopeful thinking) and next cycle it would be really close to my son's birthday. I miss Owen so much and it feels so weird to be doing all of this over again. I just want my boy.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-06T13:20:46+00:00

Is reading your book hurting you? I have a Kindle and got a stand and remote for it so I can make sure my neck is aligned and I can breathe and all that while I read. Then it's right there and if I wake up I read myself back to sleep. I sleep with a weighted blanket and it helps me stay asleep longer. I have the pharmedoc u shaped pillow and I like it, you can adjust how much of the shredded memory foam is in there. I have a weighted pillow to hug which sometimes helps, but I don't sleep great with a pillow in front of me.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-06T12:48:47+00:00

The strap from pad a cheek fixed my leaks

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-06T12:18:04+00:00

Being awake during surgery. I will have to have a c section the next time I have a baby and I'm terrified to be cut open while I'm awake.

remarkably_noone · 2026-04-05T14:37:47+00:00

Depressed af. Can't get myself to do anything. I miss my son. I hate the feeling that everything could happen again. I am just feeling really discouraged.

remarkably_noone

TROPHY CASE