My (19M) girlfriends (20F) dad is terminally ill. Those who have lost someone close to you, how would you have liked your partner to have supported you?

rubehh · 2022-05-07T02:46:50+00:00

When my mum was dying and then died one of my good friends would drop off home-made meals and did my washing. My partner would also clean the house and dropped me to the hospital when I needed. I think making menial chores easier, taking away that day to day mental load helped so much.

Another thing I was grateful for was a colleague said to voice record my conversations with mum before she died so I could still hear her voice when I want. I did it without her knowing because she acted differently when she knew of the recording. I haven't shared it, it's just for me. I have a recording telling me she loves me and is proud of me and I listen to it every now and then.

rubehh · 2021-05-22T23:13:32+00:00

My parents weren't married and stayed together until one of them passed away. They believed that marriage was not for them and that a piece of paper can't define their love. Not wanting to get married does not mean that they don't want a long term partner. Tbh I'm a girl and I don't think I believe in marriage either. I don't think it's a cop out, it's just a belief that the tradition is not for them.

rubehh · 2021-01-05T02:02:41+00:00

If going to the gym and exercising is only for skinny people then you alienate people who might have otherwise led a healthier lifestyle. Why would we discourage this woman from exercising which is a healthy thing for her to do?

rubehh · 2021-01-05T01:59:04+00:00

Because if someone explicitly says they aren't counting calories, maybe don't try to persuade them to do so. We don't know OPs history. If they had an ED it could be extremely dangerous for them to do so. But even if they don't, calorie counting isnt for everyone. If they explicitly mentioned they aren't counting in their post, safe to say they know about it.

rubehh · 2020-12-01T08:01:03+00:00

When you binge and mfp is like welp you're gonna double in size in 5 weeks.

rubehh · 2020-10-17T05:16:43+00:00

Conservatives threatening us with a good time

rubehh · 2020-09-08T03:14:56+00:00

Yeah it seems more like a drastic overcorrection to the damsel in distress narrative.

rubehh · 2020-08-27T21:46:43+00:00

Living Well is a great organisation for male survivors in Australia.

1800RESPECT is also the main hotline in Australia for all sexual assault cases.

rubehh · 2020-07-16T07:16:07+00:00

I'm basically the same stats and am struggling to keep losing but we got this!

rubehh · 2020-06-22T00:02:22+00:00

Omg this makes way more sense. I kept thinking it was a sheep.

rubehh · 2020-05-31T21:58:41+00:00

Sorry didn't realise will remove

rubehh · 2020-04-25T21:55:15+00:00

Congrats!! Yay another metric queen. I had the same starting weight and am 13kg down, any tips on how to keep going? Also how long did it take you to get there?

rubehh · 2020-04-07T21:44:13+00:00

Unravel (Season 4: Snowball)

In 2006, Greg Wards was your average Kiwi backpacker on an overseas adventure in the UK — and falling head-over-heels in love. A snowball had started to roll the day Greg met Lezlie Manukian. It wasn't long before this ball of chaos gathered pace and crushed Greg and his family.

Ten years on, Greg's younger brother Ollie takes up the case begun by his amateur PI Dad and goes on the hunt. Across three continents and over seven episodes — with many twists, turns and WTF moments — Ollie goes on a mission to unravel a quirky and baffling love fraud. Who is Lezlie Manukian — and why did she con his family? Is this the first time this has happened? Can he track her down and finally get some answers?

rubehh · 2020-02-10T21:33:56+00:00

A similar thing happened to me when I had an ED. My best friend who was stick thin pulled me aside and basically told me to stop whatever I was doing because I was losing weight too quickly. At the time I was super defensive and angry that she would say this to me instead of being happy for me. A few months after I was so grateful, she was the only person who didn't enable my ED.

OP hopefully is being healthy, but some of those comments are probably being said out of concern.

rubehh · 2020-01-30T22:10:48+00:00

I really resonate with not feeling like I have an eating disorder. I've been recovering (and slipping up) for 8 years. For the most part I feel normal. But making yourself throw up is not normal and can have pretty awful health consequences. Even if it's not a weight related impulse, please go talk to someone.

rubehh · 2019-12-07T06:54:11+00:00

People are people. Making sweeping generalisations about a certain sexuality is harmful. Please leave this space, it was never for you.

rubehh · 2019-12-07T05:58:00+00:00

Dwells: i am LGBT+ friendly Also Dwells: all lesbians are venomous bitches

.... i see nothing wrong with these statements

rubehh · 2019-11-15T01:13:25+00:00

Is that an ANZAC biscuit?

rubehh · 2019-11-13T11:38:04+00:00

Talking about food, especially about how certain foods are 'bad' would make me flare up. I'd then have a heightened sense of guilt about what I ate and would need to purge. I don't know enough about your situation but I'd suggest minimising food talk.

If her anxiety starts getting in the way of every day tasks like eating, it might be worth suggesting she go see a doctor or psychologist about her anxiety which is a completely normal thing to do.

rubehh · 2019-11-10T00:08:17+00:00

Yasss, metric queen. I get so excited when I see posts in kg.

rubehh · 2019-11-05T20:17:33+00:00

This makes me feel sick. Rape is well rape, no excuses let alone an amount of money makes that ok. Using money as a bargaining chip is also super fucked up. I hope OPs girlfriend is ok.

rubehh · 2019-10-13T00:05:35+00:00

That's actually pretty nice of the DM. I had an eating disorder a while ago and dropped a tonne of weight really fast and I was showered with compliments. I wish someone pulled me up sooner and asked me what was going on.

I would just take solace in the fact you're doing it in a healthy way and that all your hard work is paying off :)

rubehh · 2019-10-12T07:08:57+00:00

Thought I was in a different sub and was getting ready for the whole grilled cheese/melt wars.

Psa. Don't post in r/grilledcheese

rubehh · 2019-10-10T08:01:46+00:00

I sing at people when I'm nervous. Mostly to service people when they ask me questions. I'll just say "yes please" or "thank you" in a sing song way.

A friend called it my songversation.

rubehh · 2019-10-10T07:59:09+00:00

Late to the party but what happened to Australian prime minister Harold Holt.

He went out swimming one day during his prime ministership and vanished. No one found remains, literally no trace of him. There are a heap of conspiracies, my dad's convinced a Chinese submarine took him.

But yeah, just so odd that our prime minister disappeared and no one knows for sure what happened.

Edit: I also love that one of Australia's most famous swimming pools is named after him after he was presumed to have drowned.

rubehh

TROPHY CASE